3 PM, Pacific Time, pray for me PLEASE

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by zerped, Feb 5, 2006.

  1. zerped

    zerped New Member

    Well, I have my hearing in front of a judge this afternoon. I'm glad to be finally making my case, but there is some fear, of course. I am probably most afraid of not being turned down, per se, but of having to wait and prepare for yet another year of this. It's been almost four years now that I've been sick, and I know the illness will never be over, but having this whole process hanging over my head is killing me! I'm tired of telling people at the credit card company that "I have this SSDI process going and I'll find out in the next year if I'm approved or not, and..."

    As I said, any and all kind thoughts, prayers, voodoo curses, etc. would be appreciated. THANKS!
  2. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    I do pray things go well. Take care...try not to worry (easy for me to say!)...let us know what happens.

  3. zerped

    zerped New Member

    I appreciate your thoughts. The way I grew up was that we worried a lot, about everything. Things always turned out to be not that big a deal, but the theory was, "That's because we worried a sufficient amount to cause tht to happen. If we had worried just a hair less, all would be lost." I've been breaking myself of this pattern, and I realise now that as long as I'M not in charge, everything will work out. Thanks again.
  4. motomom412

    motomom412 New Member

    I'll keep you in my prayers. Good luck!

  5. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    came and went so I pray that it came your way and if it didn'y strength to fight on.

    Love ANNE
  6. ilovecats94

    ilovecats94 New Member

    Many prayers for everything to work out with your SSD case. I'll be thinking of you at 6 PM EST today. Best of luck!

  7. Sandyz

    Sandyz New Member

    Sending prayers up for you today. I hope all goes well.

  8. pepper

    pepper New Member

    I cannot imagine the stress you have been under waiting all this time for this hearing. I had to wait 2 yrs and I thought I was going to go crazy.

    Praying that all goes well.
  9. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    Eager to hear the results.

  10. hopeful4

    hopeful4 New Member

    Hope it all went well...let us know!

  11. Inishfree

    Inishfree New Member

    Praying for you especially that you will. Am in the same boat - waiting for a hearing for 2 1/2 hears going nuts and am broke.
    Please God please let you win and have the yoke removed from you.

    God Bless you. Tomorrow we will CELEBRATE!
  12. chopindog

    chopindog New Member

    I hope you won!!!!!!!!!!
  13. zerped

    zerped New Member

    I want to thank everyone for their support and report on how it went, but I'm not really sure I know myself just what took place!

    It was as informal and non-threatening as something like this could be (non-threatening but cold and impersonal). The judge asked some questions, followed by the statement, "You know don't you that many doctors (I don't remember if he said "doctors" or simply "people") believe that CFIDS is entirely psychosomatic?" I replied about the NIH and CDC and he cut me off, saying, "I'm aware of their stance on this." Oooh-boy, good start, huh?

    He seemed rational and non-emotional about the whole thing, but several times asked why I haven't seen a psychiatrist for some form of therapy that would correct the psychosomatic root of my symptoms. I told him that I had done that very thing with the therapist who had been my counselor for 3 years before I got sick.

    I said that I asked him specifically to identify anything he could find as an indicator of psychosomatic behavior, and that my therapist had said, "I have spent the last hour looking for what you asked. There are five specific things I look for and I need to find at least one with you to begin investigating possible psychosomatic behavior. You have NONE of the five indicators. This isn't psychosomatic." I also told him that I had tried to use my mental health benefit at Kaiser but they didn't want to do anything that sounded like an evaluation to be used in a federal situation.

    He made some statement towards the end of the hearing that he would have to take any personality disorder into consideration, but since I didn't have any... I jumped in and said, "Dr. G's report stated I had seven disorders..."

    He jumped in with "You were not diagnosed with any disorders." I wasn't about to get pushy, but I asked him about a table on the page where the psych. gives his final summary and findings. The judge looked at the table I made reference to and said, "These aren't a diagnosis. He's just saying you have some of the traits of these. He didn't diagnose you with any disorder."

    I didn't push the issue at that point, but after the hearing I looked at the page in question and the psych gives the heading to a table of names, "DSM-IV Diagnoses." The table then lists 5 disorders in "Axis I," one disorder under "axis II" and one disorder under "Axis III." Does "diagnosis" sometimes mean something I'm not aware of?

    He then asked for the input from a vocational something-or-other specialist. After the usual, "How long have you been doing evaluations?" etc. he asked for her description of my past work history. After that, he put a "hypothetical" situation to her. Would this "hypothetical" person be able to work at all, and if so, what kind of job. She said the hypothetical person could do X, Y, and Z.

    He seemed to be getting ready to go somewhere else with this as he asked, "In your opinion, based on blah-blah-blah, would Mr. DePrez be able to work consistently at any of these jobs enough to make a living as the law defines it?" Her answer was, "No your honor, I don't believe he could." This seemed to catch him off guard and he ended the hearing with that, telling me "Thank you and good luck."

    Checking my medical records in my file before the hearing, I found out that the naturopath I saw in 2004 wrote a letter stating that, in his profesional opion, I am in physical condition to do any kind of labor fulltime. It would be better if this had come from a specialist in neurology at Stanford Med. Ctr. or Cedars-Sinai Hospital, but it's an opinion from not only a naturopath, but the dean of faculty at one of the most well-known and respected accupuncture and naturopathy teaching institutions in the U.S.

    Adding to that the voc. spec.'s flat out "No," and the statement by the judge that the disorders listed by the psych. under the heading "Diagnoses" were not, in fact, diagnoses, it sounds to me like the judge has no choice but to rule in my favor, as much as it may pain him to do so.

    If he should rule against me, I have the items above to present to the panel, and these should be sufficient to have a negative ruling overturned, wouldn't it? As insurance, I will be contacting the office of my Congressman and asking for assistance/intervention on my behalf. I have tons of contacts in the local media, who would publicise the good congressman's efforts to obtain a successful claim. I will make sure his office is aware that May 12 is "International ME/CFIDS Awareness Day," and this would make media coverage for his good work even more likely. Finally, May 12 is also just before or just after the Oregon primary, when our representatives are up for re-election. This would not be a good time to be mentioned in the press at having turned away an unfortunate constituent like myself.

    Whether today's events warrant it or not, I am optimistic. I believe he is forced to rule on my behalf based on the testimony of the expert today. If he doesn't, and maintains that I have not been diagnosed with anything, his decision should be reversed by the appeals panel. What do you think?

    Thank you for letting me go on and on here, and thanks again for the prayers and good thoughts.

    [This Message was Edited on 02/07/2006]
  14. justlooking

    justlooking New Member

    I came on here right now to see if you had updated us on your hearing. I have read several of your recent posts on your upcoming hearing (now past hearing) and wanted to see how it went.

    Thanks for the detailed account of your hearing. You must have a pretty good memory, because I couldn't remember anything for days after, it took time to recall my hearing. I'm sure more things will come to mind over the next few days as you say "oh I should have said this" or "I shouldn't have said that". I think we all do that after the hearing. If you think of things the judge said that you didn't agree with or things you wish you had said, write them down/ make notations, just in case. It helps while your mind is still fresh from the hearing. Hopefully you won't ever have to use those notations!

    Did you have an attorney? If so he/she should have a pretty good sense about the judge and how they feel it all went.

    I would have to say it is probably favorable to you that their "job specialist" couldn't find a job you could do. I didn't have one of them in my hearing, just me, my attorney, the judge and an SSA Dr. so I can't give you any idea of how that fits into the decision.

    I hope things turn out well for you. I know the feeling of winning your case is such relief but the waiting can drive you insane. I actually won a bench approval but I still was paranoid something would change (an internal SSA review board can overturn the judges decision) before I recieved my letter and money.

    Well don't stress too much awaiting the final decision. I hope you get the decision you are hoping for!!


    I hope this all makes sense, my brains gone bad today =) Anyway, again good luck, I'll say an extra prayer for you.
  15. justlooking

    justlooking New Member

    bump bump bump

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