911-prayers needed for my daughter and our family

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by griswoldgirl, Mar 29, 2002.

  1. griswoldgirl

    griswoldgirl New Member

    My 13 year old daughter tried to jump off our 3rd floor balcony today. The police came and she has been admitted to a mental health facility. A lot of anger is stored in this child and she was "just trying to get my attention" she says. she is angry at me for being sick all the time and tired of it. She is just plain angry and throwing at whomever will accept it.

    I am praying I did the right thing by agreeing to admit her. I tried to talk her off the rail and get her down, but she would not listen so I had no choice but to call 911 and the rest is a very long story. 6 hours in the emergency room and a abulance transport later to a behavioral health facility. I am finally home at 11;30 pm. This fiasco started at 11 am this am and I am exhausted.

    My pastor has been contacted and I am gathering all the prayer that I can. Please pray for understanding on her part and clarity to see what you do has conciquences. She says it was only to get my attention and that she would not really have done it. She would have only broken her back or legs, not high enough to kill herself. She is on antidepresants and has fibro as well and i think it is all too much for her and me.

    Thank you in advance for praying that God's will will be done and that I may have the courage and clarity of mind and the physical strength and mental strength to hang in there. Pray that my daughter will make some breakthrough on just why she is so angry.

    I am not feeling like a very good mother at the moment, my illness has taken a lot of the attention away from her that she does deserve. But on the other hand. I know I do my best and my best is better thatn a lot of other parents out there.

    In a lot of pain and termoil tonight and exhausted. Going to go to bed and hope for a better tommarrow.

    cathy
  2. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    Oh Cathy, how terribly sad. You must be in a terrible state right now.

    Thirteen is such a hard age! I raised three children, and from 13 to 17 I lived in panic and fear, I doubt if they are I would have made it without the Lord! I didn't know what was coming next everyday of our lives.

    I will join you in prayer for her, and will pray for you also. What a stressful day you must have had!

    Please let me know how she is doing, and you too. Please try to get some sleep, and know that you have my sincere prayers untill I hear from you that all is well.

    God Bless!

    Shalom, Shirl


    [This Message was Edited on 03/29/2002]
  3. Jen F

    Jen F New Member

    I'm sorry for you, your daughter, your family.

    13 can be a very difficult and selfish age, I think.

    I can just imagine how flattened you might feel by all this and extremely concerned for your daughter.

    I will be thinking of you both.
  4. Ellie

    Ellie New Member

    Back almost 4 years ago my 13 year old started cutting her wrist and then one night she was so stressed out that she lock herself in a room and would not come out. I had call the police and they too couldn't get her out. When they said that they were going to kick the door in she opened it. She then was transported by the police to a er and then strapped down and in a ambluance to a mental hospital. She was released in three days. Since then we have had a lot of problems, she is a good kid just doesn't know right from wrong she now is back on her meds and I pray that she stays on them. She has stolen money from my bank, caught shoplifting and many of other things. You did the right thing it's hard now but it will get better. Try not to baby her too much. Tough love is the answer. I am always telling my daughter that to (every action there is going to be a reaction) I pray for your peace of mind and that your daughter gets the help she needs. She can also e-mail my daughter if she needs to. She is almost 17 now and is finnaly growing up. Aloha to you Ellie
  5. Harmony

    Harmony New Member

    Cathy,
    Words cannot express how sorry I am for what you have gone through. I have 3 children and one is 15 and I know that is a very hard age. You must be exhausted and drained!

    We can be thankful that she did not jump and that God protected her from that. We can also be thankful that she is getting the medical/emotional care in the hospital she needs at this time. I know at a time like this it is very hard to be thankful for anything but those two things came to my mind.

    Remember, you are not to blame and you have been a very good mother. Our kids make their own decisions and some things we just don't have control over.

    Remember also, that God is right there with you at this moment and with your daughter. He will take care of her and I believe she will be OK.

    I will pray for you, your daughter and your family, that God will give you His strength and you will feel His arms of love around you all.

    God bless you and try to take care of yourself!

    Many hugs,
    Harmony
  6. Pixie

    Pixie New Member

    Cathy, so sorry to hear of your bad experiance, or it may be the best thing that ever happened, as it was for me, my daughter is 40 years old is just now getting the right treatment for the illness that she has, have posted my story before but feel it may be helpful to you for me to post it again, we and the doctors thought she had fms/cfs, gave med after med, she was in bed most of the time, gained weight, could not function, I was taking care of her 3 children most of the time, one day she said she did not want to live any longer, that's when I called The Harbor, which is a mental inst. here in Fl, came home 3 days later with right treatment for the illness she has, which is bipolar, hyper mannia, NOW, this girl is doing soooooo good, never was this good in all her life, she is on depkote,and will be probably all her life, I cannot say enough good that has come out of this ordeal, but thank God that I have my daughter with a functional mind, she is loosing weight, just yesterday she went to hairdresser, when I say that about her, it is different, before, she could care less, there is hope, there is meds for these illnesses, and my hope and prayers are that your daughter will get the help she needs from this, I do believe she is in the right place to get help.
    As far as her not understanding your illness, I don't think most children do, when I was mabe from 7 to 10 my aunt kept telling me, "your poor mother is not gonna live much longer if you don't start helping her" to me that did not go togather. I have read many of your post, and believe you have posted to and from my youngest daughter Willow
    and from what I read, you have been a good mother, take her to church, etc. we cannot blame ourselves, the lack of knowledge and understanding with your illness is what causes your daughter and the public to react the way they do, more and more every day, this awful illness is gainning attention, and the public awarness that will make the world have a better understanding.
    Cathy, I will pray that your daughter finds the treatment needed for what ever illness she has, and that your bad experiance will turn out as a good one as mine has.
    God bless, and please keep us posted as to her progress, I do care
  7. maxex

    maxex New Member

    This really angers me. Not at you. It is my opinion that these kids should only be on ANY type of drugs only under very very rare circumstances. And these "candy store" MD's are just legal drug dealers. Not all, but many. When I hear of kids on prozac or zoloft, and welbutrin sr. it makes me sick. I know, I have taken them, they are not good, I don't care what your MD says. I took welbutrin sr once, and it literally made me want to kill somebody. I had to be locked in a room for 12 hours until it wore off. Then my doctor told me to try to take another one, that the violent side affects would subside, I told him to Kiss my behind and never called him again. Alot of these kids can't do what I did. The doctor give's it to the parents and the parents shove them down their throtes even against the kids wish's many times. I have heard of other kids that were having problems with violent behavior, and they are on welbutrin. Be very careful. Do you think Jesus want's your daughter on drugs????? legal or not, any drugs???? NO!!!!! The Holy Spirit does not need drugs to act for your daughter. Satan love's drugs, remember that. The HS works through the mind, if the mind is clouded It can not work. Get your daughter out of the "world" and into the arms of Jesus. Get her into a good Christian based, drug free progam a.s.a.p. period.
    Help yes, drugs no. And if your pastor is not telling you the same, find a new pastor. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but I am very passionate about this. I have a 12 y.o. son that like me has been handed depression. As long as he is a child and under my ex-wifes and my care, drugs will never cross his lips. And I don't want to be a hypocrit, I do self medicate for myself, I smoke pot (very small amounts) for my depression, but I will be the first to addmit, it is not the best thing. But I was introduced to it 25 years ago, and old habits are hard to break. And I know the HS is working on me for it.
    Keep her off of ANY drugs, legal or not. Look up Exodus 15:26 What does it say??

    "For I the Lord am your healer"

    It's very simple. That's it. He is the doctor. Believe it, stand on it. And He does not need prozac to get it done.....Did you read my post to you about my ankle? Now what if I would have listend to that doctor, my leg would be gone, now I have my leg and it is healed. All I wanted that doctor to do was to put it back together, Jesus did the rest.
  8. griswoldgirl

    griswoldgirl New Member

    I must admit this morning I am very drained. i do knoe that I did the right thing. She was totaly out of control and I had to do what I did. I know God is right here beside my family. When I dropped off her clothes last night I enclosed a note telling her what we were celebrating this weekend and reminded her that becuse of what Jesus did for us, we do not have to be perfect adn that I loved her very much and that is WHY I did what I did.

    I am sad this morning. It was funny I woke up and went into her room and wanted to cry. i had forgotten her best friend was sleeping in there. She took care of my son(she is 16 and well grounded) while all this was going on. When I saw her face, I realized that She was lucky. we have not had any other trouble with drugs, sex, shoplifting or any of the other things teenagers do. We just have a power struggle going on continually. She is always so independant and has her own opinion about everything, even the things I give direction about. She has anexcuse or a fight for every request no matter how simple it is. Her behavior is manioc in sorts, she goes from giddy and uncontroable laughter when you cannot calm her down to deep depression.

    Mental illness gallops in our family. MY father was psizofrenic(sp?0) and my mother in law was manic. My husband has very deep clinacal depression and so does his sister, my mother was hospitalized in college with a "nervous breakdown" no one ever released the details to me. She has been gone since I was 17. so geneticaly she his hosed.

    Hine site is always 20/20- her first psychiatrist suggested a 2-3 week treatment program months ago and we opted top just beef up the meetings with her therapist. I guess God woke us up and we finally did the right thing.

    As for me, I am weary, but I am strong at the same time. I have you guys and a great support system through church and my friends. They all have been praying and helping in any way they can. My hubby usually does not come home until mondays from work and he is coming home tomarrow so we can attend a meeting with her councelor on Monday morning.

    As for the dude with his evil medicines and drug lecture. May the lord bless you and you are entitled to your opinion, but sir, pot is also a drug and you are a hypocrit! I appreciate your words of wisdom, sir, but you need to look in the mirror. I will pray for you.

    cathy
  9. Deb J

    Deb J New Member

    You did the right thing. Don't ever doubt that. Thirteen is a very rough hormonal age and she is reacting to the world around her. Unfortunately, her world is not perfect....but then again nobody's world is perfect. She will realize it but it may take some time. Her venting to you and getting into a therapeutic, safe setting is the best thing for both of you!! It really is! This is only temporary and she will come back with a wisdom she has never known. I've seen it with one of the most unruly child I have ever known. It was tough for her Mom and Dad (divorced) but she is now an adult who is doing great and got her act together.
    Hang in there...and my prayers go out for you and your family.
    Hugs,
    Deb J
  10. homeskillet19

    homeskillet19 New Member

    Honey, I am so sorry that your family is in this distress at this moment!!!!
    You did the right thing, always take these threats seriously!!!!
    your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
    Your friend,
    Denise
  11. maxex

    maxex New Member

    Admitted it?
    A hypocrit is one that does not admit it and then behind your back does what he says not to do. I am open and honest. I am not a hypocrit. I am open about it and confess it out in the open. Truth hurts and I can tell by your response it hit a nerve. What you think of me (the "Dude") is not important. I would just encourage you to read the bible and actually believe it as true. Believe is a big word. It means you may have to put it into practice. It is my opinion that at least 75% of today's so called "Christians" do not. When it get's hard they run. Especially here in the U.S. The actual statistics are very high, I can't give an exact # but most "Christians" have never read, and do not actually study the bible. Satan know's Gods word inside and out, and he uses it. If you don't know it for yourself, you are in big trouble. How did Satan approch Jesus at the temptation, All Gods word twisted. Do you think he does not do the same to us. With this in mind I feel led to ask you to read this scripture...

    Galatians 5 16-26 and in verse 20 remember that the word sorcery in the greek is pharmacy meaning drugs.........Drugs are Drugs, legal or not.

    Satan is corupting the church from the INSIDE out. The demise of the church is well laid out in Rev. Don't fall into the trap. Remember it is either better to be hot or cold, if you are just warm He will spit you out, which are you? Running your daughter to a pshyciatrist to have her put on drugs I have to wonder. But again it is neither here nor there what I think. And no I am not judging you, it's only an observation, from the info you have given. And I will not be affraid to say that any Pastor that is coaching you to do so, he is the one you should be praying for not me.....thanks.

    P.S. as I sit here right now I am drug free and have been for awhile. But I wanted to be completely clean, even about my past.

    The Dude.
  12. griswoldgirl

    griswoldgirl New Member

    you-honesty is a breath of fresh air I am always willing to breathe. take good care of yourself

    cathy
  13. Sheli

    Sheli New Member

    I am so sorry that you and your family are having such a difficult time right now. As Harmony said earlier, please take comfort in the fact that God is there, and he kept your daughter from jumping and helped you both through the difficult time following, and through your decision making process. I know that at this moment you said that you are not feeling like that good of a mother, but please know that because you are doing the things you are doing right now, and giving her the help and support that she needs, and loving her through it, that she has a great Mom! I am praying for you, and your health, as well as your daughters. I am praying for clarity and strength and healing, and I pray that you can learn together what is making her act out so, and that together, with God's help, you overcome it very soon. Take care, and keep us posted. God bless you.

    Love and prayers,
    Sheli
  14. teach6

    teach6 New Member

    I can realy relate to what you have been through. Last summer my son returned from NY City, where he had been looking for a job and was acting weird. Within 24 hours we were at the emergency room with him. I was the only one he trusted, thank God. Because he is 22 we had to convince him to commit himself. That is not an easy task, but beat the alternative. He was psychotic. When he finally agreed to be medicated I was able to convince him that admitting himself was the best thing. It was such an awful experience.

    When he was released over a week later his meds were wrong (he's bipolar and was on an antidepressant, which made him psychotic again). So less than a week later an hour before his dad was to pick him up to go for his day program he took my car to drive to a friend's. Then he decided he wanted to go home, so he closed his eyes and let go of the wheel. Obviously he didn't get home, but nobody was injured. Then he drove the car to my house and ran with his backpack. I was in the shower all this time.

    Police showed up at my door and I ended up filling a missing persons report. Two grueling hours later he was found and my pastor met me where the police had him. The officers were so wonderful in the way they handled the situation.

    My heart goes out to you. I know how difficult this is. You will live through it, but it will be tough. If you have the energy to find a support group for parents, do so, or find a therapist for yourself. Above all, take care of yourself so you will be able to take care of your daughter.

    This same son is now back in NY working and reported happily this weekend he has found an apartment to share. He had been staying with friends.

    You are in my prayers and I an sending you and your daughter out to my own network of prayer warriors.

    With hugs and love,
    Barbara
  15. teach6

    teach6 New Member

    Frecs asked me to pass this on to you since she is having trouble logging on.

    Barbara

    I don't know why, but that website doesn't let me post
    from home...I think it is an interface problem. Could
    you do me a favor and post this for me to her thread?:


    I am so sorry for the painful events that have filled
    your life.

    It is very important that you feel confident in the
    professionals who are caring for your daughter. If
    these people don't seem to have their act together,
    you may want to consider another situation for your
    daughter.

    Don't allow your daughter to draw you into explaining
    to her why you choose to remain married. It is not
    for her to tell you how to live your life. Rather
    than argue with her or try to rationalize with her,
    calmly tell her that it is not her right to dictate
    how you live and if she doesn't change the subject you
    will leave. Be prepared to do just that. Without
    drama. Without looking back. Without carrying the
    guilt out with you.

    I have worked in a PRTF (Psychiatric Residential
    Treatment Facility) for teenage girls as a Mental
    Health Associate. They are incredibly good at
    manipulation. Nothing is ever their fault. I even
    had one girl, 14 years old, who wanted her parents to
    divorce. She wanted her mother's full time attention
    24/7. Before being placed in the PRTF, she had even
    attempted to injure her father.

    I won't ask why your daughter claims to want you to
    get a divorce. She probably has a laundry list of
    reasons...all to benefit her egocentric reality.

    It is important that you are able to work with the
    professional team. That is why if you don't have
    confidence in them or for whatever reason you don't
    feel that you can work with them, you need to seek
    another facility. You and the professional staff must
    present a united front. What part is your husband
    taking in this situation? You shouldn't have to
    shoulder this alone. It is also important for you and
    your husband to present a united front. If your
    daughter thinks she can get inbetween you two and
    "divide and conquer"...she will, big time.

    I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
  16. pepper

    pepper New Member

    I'm so sorry about what you and your daughter are going through. You sound like a wonderful, caring mom. Taking care of teenagers, even for a healthy person, is a formidable task. Being ill makes it an incredible challenge. You did the right thing for her; I just want you to know that you will both be in my prayers.
    ((((HUGS)))) Pepper
  17. kasha

    kasha New Member

    Dearest Cathy, Just read your post and I wantto tell you thatiam praying for you and your daughter. I hope you read the posting i left for you about my son. Keep your faith and pray.
    This is a very difficult age to deal with. When she comes home do not let her manipulate you because she will then know you questioned your actions and use it against you at will Believe me she will. I have gone thru much trauma with my 15 yr. old son a few years ago and had to send him away after exhausting all avenues for help. He is now a resposible 19 yr old with much love and compassion, very independent. Prior to that he was a master of manipulation which he played on me and my x with perfection. these kids are good to do this. Just stand your ground no matter how much your heart is hurting and you will see everything willturn out ok. It will take awhile and inthe meantime we willbe hear to help you get thru the rough times. God Bless and praying for you. Love Kathy