THANK YOU, THANK YOU to all for the wonderful responses and the support. I read each one and appreicate it all so much. I am very sorry that in the process, I brought back to you some bad past memories that some of you had and my heart goes out to you. Shelby the cat has gone to bed with me and stayed all night, every night, since I posted. She is like a guardian. Cesar the cat stays with me like velcro all day and if I lay down on the sofa, I have a cat on my chest and one up against the side of my chest. The cat on top of my chest stares into my eyes doing "The CAT scan." I finished my shower and was drying off and Shelby amazingly got up from the doorway and walked right up to me in the bathroom and I was still wet (cats abhor wet). It was as if she was saying: "You are late for your 7:00 AM CAT Scan. Please proceed as soon as practicably possible to your bed, lie down, and a Feline Physican will be with you shortly for a quick and painless CAT Scan. Thank you for following your Feline Physician's Orders so we don't have to call in the Cat Mafia Associates to take over." I got in bed and a cat is on top of me staring at me for the CAT scan, and I know dogs and cats have incredible senses and they can tell your pulse, your blood pressure, whether you have a fever, whether you have anxiety or depression. Their senses are so much greater than a human. I apparently passed the CAT scan and the cats stretched out and it was 10 minutes of kitty purring and me scratching them before I got up to get dressed. I have been going out and I went and scootered around a local public sitting place, garden I haven't been to and it turns out it is right at the center for the arts and I went in their gift shop and it was amazing what they have in there. Outside they were setting up for an Art Fest and were putting up stands and lighting and all that yesterday. It was interesting and there's even a fountain there that I didn't know existed. So again, thank you so much for your help and I have forgiven Mom, but not forgotten. She had a serious mental illness that her mother, Mom and apparently her brother now has. Back when Mom's was growing up and was a young adult, people were put into insitutions that had mental health problems and not helped out at home. This may have been part of why Mom could not reach out for help at an earlier time when this started taking hold when I was a child.