A Letter from the Dog A MUST read for all dog lovers

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by ckball, Jul 18, 2008.

  1. ckball

    ckball New Member

    TO: GOD

    Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever,
    smell one another?

    Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

    Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the
    cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?

    Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no
    human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

    Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal structions,
    hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What dohumans understand?

    Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

    Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

    Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things Imust remember to be a good dog.

    1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or
    after they throw it up.

    2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.,
    just because I like the way they smell.

    3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.

    4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.

    5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

    6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when
    he's on the toilet.

    7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'.

    8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm
    under the coffee table.

    9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before
    entering the house - not after.

    10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag
    my butt.

    11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and
    lick my crotch.

    12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with
    him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

    P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my
    testicles back?

    This was too good not to share, do you need a kleenex or a maxi pad due to leakage- Carla

  2. poets

    poets Member

    So cute. And very accurate.

  3. springwater

    springwater Well-Known Member

    Yay! dogs...Bestest critters in the world.

    I have to add....

    13. I will not wander into the living room when theres company and deposit a dried up frog carcass i found in the garden at said compnays feet for said company to admire.

    14. I will not use moms kitchen chair legs as a gnawing post.

    15. If theres more than one of me at home, I will not have a 'sprinkling' contest in room corners to show whos territory is whos.

    God Bless All the Dogs of the World and us

  4. sisland

    sisland New Member

    Is Wonderful carla and all!,,,,,,,lolol,,Thanks for the lolol's,,,Sis
  5. Marta608

    Marta608 Member

    It brings back memories.

  6. fibromickster

    fibromickster New Member

    I love the doogie jokes. I betcha Missy and Twy told you those. LOL

    Love ya too!!! Saw you mssg on the Brunette Jokes I posted. LOL

    [This Message was Edited on 07/19/2008]
  7. windblade

    windblade Active Member

    Laughed all the way through! This is a keeper.
  8. findmind

    findmind New Member

    Wonderful! So so true; they are so much smarter than we are and this is o so cute.

    Thanks for posting it, carla, now I think I'll ask my dog to read it and get a good laugh from it.

  9. Greenbean7

    Greenbean7 New Member

    Thank you, I will be in the bathroom fixing my make up now!

  10. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member


    Now those are just to cute and funny.

    Did Missy and Twy tell you those after or before they disappeared temporarily?? So glad that you got them back !!!



  11. ckball

    ckball New Member

    I thought some of you would appreciate this. I have now recorded it and play for the girls 3 times a day,LOL.

    Springwater, loved your additions too, mine no longer bring me "presents" the know I don't give them back :)

    Thanks for reading and glad it gave you a giggle-Carla

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