A TYPICAL day....or not

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by tedebear, Nov 5, 2002.

  1. tedebear

    tedebear New Member

    My husband says when he walks through the door "Nothing done again today?" I am wondering what a lot of you do on a typical daily basis. The pain we endure at times prevents us from having "typical days" but on average what do some of you do regularly in 24 hrs.? My husband says I don't do enough. I'm lucky with the discomfort to accomplish little things.
    Thanks for the input and very very soft hugs today.

    EX: Get up and make the coffee
    Read the paper, feed the dog, let the dog out
    Take a hot bath, wash my hair.
    Wash a load of laundry.
    Go to the grocers. Prepare dinner. Wash the dishes.
    Hot bath again. Go to bed and hope to get at least
    4 hrs. sleep.
    [This Message was Edited on 11/06/2002]
    [This Message was Edited on 11/06/2002]
  2. tedebear

    tedebear New Member

    My husband says when he walks through the door "Nothing done again today?" I am wondering what a lot of you do on a typical daily basis. The pain we endure at times prevents us from having "typical days" but on average what do some of you do regularly in 24 hrs.? My husband says I don't do enough. I'm lucky with the discomfort to accomplish little things.
    Thanks for the input and very very soft hugs today.

    EX: Get up and make the coffee
    Read the paper, feed the dog, let the dog out
    Take a hot bath, wash my hair.
    Wash a load of laundry.
    Go to the grocers. Prepare dinner. Wash the dishes.
    Hot bath again. Go to bed and hope to get at least
    4 hrs. sleep.
    [This Message was Edited on 11/06/2002]
    [This Message was Edited on 11/06/2002]
  3. joyof3

    joyof3 New Member

    My boyfriend said the same thing to me last night.his words "what have you done today the house is a mess".
    best wishes .





    first I have three kid two i have to get ready for school.

    make coffee
    make lunches
    get them something to eat
    dishes
    vaccum not everyday
    make bed
    make dinner
    give kids bath
    put kids to bed
    shower at night
    stephanie
  4. tedebear

    tedebear New Member

    To joy of 3

    Wow, even a day with 3 children. Hats off to you!!!!
    My grandchildren wear me out when they visit and they are 2 boys 7 and 11. My kids are grown and out of the house.
    It's tough.
    Come on guys...let's get your typical day (those of you with FM).
    Very soft hugs folks.
  5. LisaMay

    LisaMay New Member

    I don't have any children, but I do have 6 animals (dogs, cats & bird) and 2 tanks of fish, and a husband. We own a 4BR home on 3.50 acres including a pool, orchard, and multiple flower gardens. I work 3 days a week for 3-4 hours (mostly to maintain my feeling of usefulness). I have learned that I cannot complete all my housekeeping chores in 1 day and that is a major thing for me. It takes me all week to get things done.

    I give you both "thumbs up" for your daily tasks! I'm certain if the tables were turned, your men would be surprised at what you do accomplish in just one day and would be damn proud of it.

    Life is short. Lisa
  6. EllenComstock

    EllenComstock New Member

    Hi, Tedebear:

    It sounds like you are doing the best you can. After reading over your activities, it sounds like you are doing quite a bit during the day. I think just going to the grocery store is exhausting and I dread it every week. I take it you are no longer working outside the home. I know I push myself more than I should, but here's my typical day:

    I get up at 6:00 a.m. - do some housework like maybe last night's dishes (too tired to do them most evenings), maybe pay some bills. Also feed my three cats. Some mornings I might run the vacuum or do some dusting. I do these activities for about 45 minutes. Then I exercise (we have exercise equipment in the basement) for half hour. Then get ready for work. Work all day. Some nights I run errands after work like pick up prescriptions, get groceries, go to the bank, etc. When I get home I get dinner ready. I also go through the mail, read newspaper, feed cats.

    I also have family responsibilities. I am guardian for my mentally ill brother who lives in a group home. So I need to reserve time to see him, plus there is some paperwork to do at times. My mother just passed away last month so I now have estate things to do (I am executor). I am in the midst of cleaning out her house and selling it. I think I have a buyer. So I am just trying to pace myself right now.

    Fortunately my husband is doing the laundry and he does the mowing, but there are times I wish he would help more. I get frustrated when he leaves things around the house. I hate clutter, but don't like to pick up after him. I have spoken to him about it and he sometimes remembers to pick up after himself. He will be layed off soon for three months. Last year he did do more housework at this time such as doing dishes, but I never get to cut back on doing housework myself even though I work full-time.

    So how does your husband help you? Or does he not really understand your physical limitations? My husband is finally coming around. He used to say things like, "Things will get better. We just have to figure out how to fix you". I just got a book in the mail yesterday that I order from Amazon.com called "Fibromyalgia for Dummies". I noticed while fixing dinner that the hubby had picked it up and was leafing through it. I looked at a little of it later and think it will be a good book and easy to understand.

    Sorry to ramble on. I guess I needed to do a little venting, too!

    Ellen
  7. silverbullet

    silverbullet New Member

    Hi Tedebear

    My husband is understanding and doesn't seem to care if the house work gets done, as long as the dishes are done. Don't use the FM excuse alot, does not seem to bother me as much as the numbing I have in half my back and both arms and getting worse in arms each day.

    I have 2 girls 5 and 22 mths, I'm a spare school bus driver and take care of my husband's and my home base businesses, paper work, computer stuff etc.

    Get Up and shower
    Feed girls
    Check e-mail
    Work on computer for my business
    Do dishes and laundry
    Make lunch
    Put daughter on school bus
    2nd daughter goes for nap
    My Time
    Get dinner ready and do dishes
    Give kids a bath
    Deliver the Avon Orders
    Put oldest to bed
    My youngest gets me up in the night til 3-4am

    Donna
  8. pamela

    pamela New Member

    STARTS W/ GETTING UP AT 4:45 TO 5:00 A.M. THEN TAKE HOT BATH TO SOAK THE PAIN AND FATIGUE DOWN A BIT. GET READY FOR WORK, DO DISHES, COOK BREAKFAST FOR ME AND HUBBY. MAKE LUNCHES FOR HUBBY AND ME, DRIVE THROUGH AUSTIN TRAFFIC 1 HR AND ARRIVE AT WORK AT 7:30 A.M. WORK ALL DAY IN A INSURANCE/CASHIER OFFICE AND OR PHARMACY DEPENDING WHO SHOWS UP FOR WORK. GO HOME AT 4:30 P.M. AND ON THE WAY (IF I HAVE TO) GO TO THE GROCERY STORE, AND OR BANK. THEN GET HOME, DO DISHES TAKE HOT BATH AND GET INTO BED W/ T.V. LIGHTS OUT AT 8:30-9:30 P.M.

    SOME DAYS I'M TO SICK AND JUST BARELY GET TO WORK AND GO HOME AND CLIMB INTO BED.

    MY HUSBAND IS GREAT...IF I CAN'T GET TO ANYTHING LIKE HOUSE WORK OR COOKING HE DOES IT. HE HAS THE ENERGY OF 4 PEOPLE IN A GIVEN DAY. LOTS OF HUGS!!! PAMELA
  9. tedebear

    tedebear New Member

    And to all of you for that matter.
    That is a heavy load to carry.

    No, I don't work anymore. Can't with the RSD and Fibro and arthritis. Worked 32 years as an Administrative Assistant.
    Husband works too hard. Lucky if I get 1-2 hours out of him on the weekend. Taking out the garbage at my request once a week is a big deal.
    To all of you out there, thanks for responding and keep on truckin' as they say.
    Very soft hugs.
    [This Message was Edited on 11/06/2002]
  10. achy

    achy New Member

    We have 3 BR home on 12 acres - kid grown & far away
    Veggie/Flower gardens

    Up at 6:30 - I quit working in June
    Drink coffee while hubby gets ready to leave
    hubby makes his own breakfast/lunch

    Feed animals 2 dogs (inside) 4 cats (outside)
    wash breakfast dishes

    Sit/Lay down & rest

    straighten house
    make bed

    Sit/Lay down & rest

    1 chore like:
    do laundry (every other day)
    vacuum (every other day)
    dust 1x wk

    Sit/Lay down & rest

    If I have energy/pain allows I try & do a fun thing like
    sew, light gardening, take dogs for walk around property

    I an ususally whipped by time hubby gets home at 4....
    dinner
    dishes
    bath
    bed

    not necessarilty in that order...
    Some days, not at all
    Achy
  11. Hapier1

    Hapier1 New Member

    Hi, New to this, but when I read your typical day it sounded so familiar. I have FM and I have been on unpaid disability for a year and a half (SSD not approved, yet!)so of course I do nothing. I get the same thing from my Fiance when he gets home from work. "What do you do all day!" I finally gave up outside work at the end of this summer after I rolled the riding lawnmower and it landed on top of me. My house isn't as clean as I use to keep it, but I manage to still do most of it myself. I have a 3 BDR house on a half acre. I have a nine year old daughter who I get ready for school,then I clean up the kitchen after breakfast mess and whatever was eaten after dinner dishes the night before. Start by cleaning one thing a day bathrooms,bedrooms, dust, ? I don't vacuum much anymore, my fiance does it. Depending on how I feel depends on what gets done. All day everyday I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOO tired! I fight to stay awake. And of course there is the pain... With FM you don't have typical days. My typical day is waking up not knowing what is going to hurt today. [This Message was Edited on 11/06/2002]
  12. Spoonerpaws

    Spoonerpaws New Member

    I used to be the energizer bunny, now I am lucky if I get my house vaccuumed.

    It takes me all week to clean my house!

  13. nini

    nini New Member

    Don't worry about what other people think is my advise. My husband often comes home and says mmmm had a bad day today hun? What can I do for you? Yeah I know sounds corny but he's a real brick. On the days when I feel I just can't do anything - I DON"T. I have given up feeling bad about it too. The best thing you can do on days like this is rest and take care of yourself.
    nini
  14. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    I guess I have been where most of you youngsters are now, and then things got worst, or maybe better!

    My children are all grown, on their own, so thats out of the way!

    I ran a Child Care Center for ten years with this Fibro, and thats over with.

    I was one of the main pillows of the Church I attended, thats history too.

    Now this is my life now;

    Husband works for an oil company, works six months out of the year, in a few months, weeks, days, and gone the same amount of time.

    Live in a large two story house 2500 sq.feet, on 5 acres of land, have my son do the grounds, and my husband does the big shopping (he stocks up so I don't have to leave the house too much when he is gone or carry heavy stuff).

    Wake up at eight, drink my one cup of strong coffee (one cup coffee pot on the bedside table). Let the dogs out, have five, three in two out.

    In an hour I get up make toast, then sit and watch the news for another hour.

    Then do the vacuuming, put the dishes up from the dishwasher.

    Take a nap or sit down for a half hour.

    Feed and water the dogs, clean the patio, take my walk (the mailbox is a block from the house, so I kill two birds with one stone here). Feed the wild birds, hose the plants, then;

    Take a nap or sit for half and hour.

    Fix myself something to eat, then do the laundry. Take a bath/shower.

    Take another nap or sit for half and hour!

    Dust the house when I can, vacuuming the whole house takes a whole week, one room at a time!

    This is a usual routine when husband is off-shore and I am alone.

    When he is home he does the major mopping, sweeping and vacuuming, and the major shopping for me. I just keep it up a little while he is gone.

    When he is gone, I sleep in the library, as it is a chore to climb the stairs everyday just to sleep in the master bedroom. Anyway it stays clean that way! I put a Sleigh bed in the library, along with the computer, tv, and the fireplace is also in here. I love this room, its my sanctuary, and close to the kitchen.

    Off and on during the day I am on the board, probably about 6 hours a day now (since the spider bit me, I still have three numb finger tips, so I read more than I respond for the time being).

    Am usually on the board from about 4pm till about 11pm consistently, and pop in off and on during the day too.

    I used to be up till 3 or 4 in the morning, but since Mel convinced me to try the ZMA, I now go to bed about 12am, and sleep till 8pm.

    When I get off the board, or take my naps, I read, big on Serial killers right now!

    When my husband is home, we eat out a lot, and take rides and I shop in small stores, less stressful, and I don't get as tired. He takes over the dogs and the dishes when he is here, can't do that and go out too.

    So for we have our routine down pretty good.
    Now, when I have those 'bad' days, I simply take care of the dogs, and blow off anything that does not need to be done! Thats when the house gets into a bit of a mess. I do try to pick up as I go along, as I know that I can't do a big job, so I try to keep up that nothing gets into a major mess! Not easy sometimes.

    This is easy for me, I really don't have anymore real responsibilities, but I know where you all with children are coming from, I lived with the Fibro and the children for twenty years or more.

    We moved to the country, I am from New Orleans, now live in a small Country town in Louisiana called Ponchatoula. My two sons are at least 60 to 70 miles away, but my daughter is just 5 miles from me. She also helps when I need her.

    I have been a lot better getting away from the stress of the city and the people too. Its peaceful out here, and no one bothers me.

    I think I am writing 'War and Peace' here! Sorry, didn't realize how long this got!

    Shalom, Shirl





  15. lease79

    lease79 New Member

    I wake up around 7am when dh gets up for work :)
    He gives the kids breakfast
    I then -
    Have a cup of tea
    Dress the kids
    Get them ready for Kindy or Occasional Care (if it's one of those days, eldest has kindy twice a week, middle child has Occasional Care once a week.)
    Bundle them all into the car
    Drop child/ren off
    Pay any bills that might need paying
    Come home
    Check e-mail & other sites
    Get whichever children are at home lunch
    Put youngest child down with a bottle for afternoon nap
    Maybe do the washing, or the vacuuming
    Pray that the house is still standing when DH comes home from work
    Drive to the kindy & pick up eldest child
    Come home & utterly collapse on the lounge
    DH comes home, & tentatively asks "How was you day hon?"
    Children are gotten tea, bathed & put to bed
    DH & I have tea & attempt to straighten the house which inevidably HAS fallen down during the day
    Come online & post a little
    Collapse into bed!

    Lease
  16. teach6

    teach6 New Member

    Here's how I spent my day.

    10 AM woke up, showered, dressed, dried hair, put on makeup and curled stick straight hair. "Walked" my dog, on my scooter, ate breakfast about 11:30.

    Checked email, went for manicure and pedicure where I almost fell asleep. Then I rushed to my massage where I almost fell asleep again. Went home, ate lunch at 4 PM and went to sleep for an hour. Would have been longer, but it was getting late.

    Scooter walked my dog again, went out to dinner with my son and stopped at Home Depot and grocery for quick trips on way home.

    Made phone calls, worked on some paperwork, came online.

    That was my day, and probably fairly typical as for the amount I accomplished. Tomorrow I'll be hanging around home more. I'll also be sleeping more!

    Barbara
  17. Rain122865

    Rain122865 New Member

    I thought a good day was getting up and taking a shower and getting dressed...now I feel like a slackard!
  18. lease79

    lease79 New Member

    Please don't feel like that :(
    We all suffer with these dd's in varying degree's.
    Believe you me I have those days that having a shower & actually getting out of bed are a major accomplishment.
    But most days because we have NO help with the children I have no choice but to soldier on, & pray that I will make it through the day until dh gets home.
    **hugs**

    Lease
  19. domesticgoddess

    domesticgoddess New Member

    Hubby usually wakes me up at 7:30 am.

    Jump out of bed, wash face, apply make-up, scramble for clothes to wear to work.

    At work by at least 8:30 am. Leave at 4 pm. Arrive at home by 4:30. STRIP all my clothes & put on Nightie. Fix a weak Gin with Diet Tonic Water.

    Head to office to catch up on emails. Hubby arrives around 5:30. He fixes dinner & is ready around 7 to 7:30 pm. Back in office for further catch up on emails.

    9:30 pm off for long hot soak in bathtub with Epsoms Salts & Hydrogen Perioxide. Back on net - still catching up on all emails (700 a day!).

    Nitey Nite is around midnite & up the next morning to routine. Have same weekly housekeeper for 12 yrs. She vaccums, dusts, cleans bathrooms & replaces our bed with clean sheets.

    Hmmm Gee Pretty Proud Of My Self - Able to work out of the home 4 days a week! Weekends - I crash! Nothing strenious just lay low on the weekends.

    Gentleness


  20. tedebear

    tedebear New Member

    Thanks for all the insights. From what I can see most of us enjoy energizing by staying home and chilling a lot. The one downside of always being home and not able to do things is it is so discouraging that I feel like a vegetable. Does it ever get better?????
    ::::::Soft hugs:::::::::