About friendships

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by LauraLea, Dec 27, 2002.

  1. LauraLea

    LauraLea New Member

    I get these tips of the and thought this one was worth posting

    Tip of the Day for December 27, 2002

    When you have a chronic illness such as CFS and/or FM, friendships vary in tolerance of illness-related issues. Some continue relatively unchanged, some become closer, and some dissolve.

    A balance of ill and healthy friends offers both the support only others with your illness can provide, as well as contact with the outside world.

    Characteristics of friendships vary, with some revolving around shared interests or activities and others based on common traits or professions. Some are just for fun - humor, movies, leisure activities. Deeper relationships will involved more intimate sharing, of course. Having a variety of friends will help reduce boredom and loneliness

  2. contessa

    contessa New Member

    Your real friends will remain, though the relationship may change. My closest friend developed MS 10 years ago and I confess I didn't understand what was happening. She has emotional issues as well. I though she was always making excuses, expecially after she acquired a nice but useless boyfield 30 years her senior. We drifted apart, she moved several times, she discovered the boyfriend dead on the sofa and called me. Thank goodness for email or we wouldn't be able to contact at all. Too expensive.

    Now I'm sick and I have all the excuses she had - although I'm the emotionally stable one with the terrific husband. But I finally understand her and I did apologize to her for my oversights. My other friend is working two jobs and she has severe heart disease and the can't remember the name - the disease where you fall asleep anyplace, anytime. We also don't get to see one another. She feels I abandoned her when I quit working with her. And we adore each other.

    Never having had many true friends I had none to really lose, just a bunch of work aquaintances that I wouldn't trust for 10 minutes. My true friends are still friends even if we haven't seen each other for 10 years or more. Recently my hubby and I developed a really great friendship with one of my old boyfriends and his long-time lady.

    But being home does get lonely and boring. Wish I had something to do but I can't keep schedules because of the fatique cycle. And I tend to type too much - sorry. Good luck to anyone going through the loss of a friendship - but new ones will come along, new interests will arise, live can and will get better with effort. Wish I could say the same about our health!!
  3. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    That is very good, something like; 'when in Rome do as the Roman's do' motto.

    I do have friends that I only discuss certain subjects with, like politics, religion,books, history, illness, those who I knew when we were 'young', those are the 'memory lane' friends.
    Even my three children are all different, each has his/her own interest. Thats what we discuss when we speak, one is in college, the other loves Harley's, my daughter is big with fashion, her job, books, actually her are I are great friends we discuss a lot of differnt subjects including my problem with Fibro.

    Then there is the friend that you can tell just about anything too. Those are few and far between!

    Thanks for the 'Tip of the Day', it is a great one.

    Shalom, Shirl

  4. LauraLea

    LauraLea New Member

    Bumping up