Alzheimer abuse

Discussion in 'General Health & Wellness' started by palgram, May 1, 2010.

  1. palgram

    palgram New Member

    HELP! 24 hours ago I found out my Alzheimer father's lady friend of 6 weeks
    talked my father into marrying her. She did this 3 weeks ago. Got on all
    his accouts and had him get a new Will naming her primary. Anyone ever
    heard of this happening to someone they know?
  2. TigerLilea

    TigerLilea Active Member

    Have you considered contacting a lawyer? Legally there might be something you can do to get this overturned if your father is not mentally competant to be signing legal documents.
  3. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    Yeah, I would think there would be something you could do.
    Where does your Dad live? Does your Dad still live on his own? I'm assuming so since he was able to get out to get married and go to the bank etc. with her?
    Do you have documentation from a Dr. or something saying he is mentally incompetent?
    Hopefully he has a guardian?

    I would certainly take the necessary steps quickly before this woman does anything - not trying to panic you but for someone to rush in like that and get her name on accts etc. would make me wonder what was going on.

    Are you on any accounts? Is any money missing? Can you get any money? I might not let them get wind of anything to ensure no one tries to get any money out. You need to protect your Dad's assets since he can't right now. He's obviously in love or believes he is.
  4. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    First thing to do would be to see an elder care attorney to find out what the laws are in your state and what preliminary actions you would need to take, if any.

    It would be important to obtain medical records indicating that he is in a stage of Alzheimer's where he is incompetent to marry and incompetent to give non-family access to his accounts, etc. The problem is that HIPPA prevents many doctors from discussing your father's situation (particularly if his new wife has taken over and specifically designated that), but the attorney may be able to work around that to get you contact and medical records for your Dad. If you Dad has been deemed as competent to get married and is competent to do what he wants with his life, then you're out of luck.

    If you Dad is deemed in the medical records and by the doctors to be incompetent and unable to marry and incompetent to do what he wants with his life, then the attorney will have to contact the doctors to be sure they will back up the medical records for a court case. If so, then the attorney will take over, probably file emergency papers with the court to have a judge freeze all assets, etc., halt the new wife from any actions (including raiding the house of items, or moving your Dad to another State, etc.), and start a lawsuit to declare your Dad as legally incompetent, annul the marriage on the basis that your Dad was legally incompetent to enter into such, declare the will as invalid because your Dad was legally incompetent at the time, and have you declared as his sole Guardian until he either passes or the Court decides otherwise.

    I'm very sorry to find out you are in the midst of this. This is the problem with some that go into forms of dementia/Alzheimer's. To all out there, get your docments completed by a good lawyer as soon as the loved one is diagnosed early and make it so that outsiders cannot walk in and do something like this. Good luck and prayers.

    Just as an addendum, after you have it all straightened out, because your Dad is this vulnerable to the outside world of crooks, realize that cleaning people, people stopping by seeking work, etc. could come to the home and pull the same thing on him that the lady did. It may be time to consider assisted living where he will be safe, be looked after, have an apartment and will be safe from the bad people in the outside world.

    [This Message was Edited on 05/02/2010]
  5. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    Have you decided what you will do? I ask because your situation does happen and elders do get taken advantage of and steps you take may help others. Good luck with this.