Another "New One"

Discussion in 'Caregivers' started by louojae, Jun 19, 2004.

  1. louojae

    louojae New Member

    Hello, All---
    I am another "New One" to this. GlAD to have found this place to talk to others in the same (or similar) boat. I'm taking care of my 75 yr old husband who has Alzheimers. I am 50, we've been together 28 yrs - I was 23 and he was 48 when we first met. We have no children together. (I have none at all) I think he is entering into the moderate level now because he is starting to have behavioral problems - mistrust of me, paranoia, etc. This is so heart-breaking, but I'm dealing with it. I work full-time and am trying to juggle his care with my work. We have no family near by to help, and he doesnt want anyone else's help. We have a big issue with control since he is so used to "taking care" of me (due to our age difference) and he is used to "calling the shots". I have an appointment with an attorney in 10 days or so so I can obtain durable power of attorney - which is the next step I think I need to take. I want to place him in day care or have someone come to our home while I am at work - not for this minute but we will probably need it in the near future. I am lucky in that the company I work for will pay for everything, daycare, in-home care, an altimately - a nursing home or assisted living home. The company already pays 100% of his med's - which he takes 15 pills per day (believe me- we would have been bankrupt if it werent for my job's benefits)The last 2 days have been good ones for him - but last weekend was the "Weekend From Hell". I had to call the police one day (I was going to have him admitted to the psych ward until I could get a nursing home from him - but when the police arrived he wasnt exhibiting any bad behavior so they could do nothing.) and another day he was "lost" for 7 hrs. He took the car and I didnt know where he was (he ended up calling me from a gas station only 2-3 miles away to come get him cuz he couldnt find his way home)It has been an experience to say the least. Anything that anyone can tell me to help would be greatly appreciated.
  2. jayhawker

    jayhawker New Member

    I posted to you on the alzheimers board, but haven't heard back from you.

    You and I are in the same boat in many ways. I am 53, my husband is 72, has severe dementia with no firm diagnosis. We have been through a great deal.

    I am on leave of absence right now because he can no longer be left alone. I also cannot afford to lose my job, so am looking for a way to get back to my job and care for him.

    I hope you come back to the board. I would love to hear from you

    My heart goes out to you. You are in a tight spot. Many left feedback for you on the other AD message board.

    Take Care