Anyone else here in their 20's?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by JD99, Aug 13, 2008.

  1. JD99

    JD99 New Member

    No, I'm not trying to run a singles ad. Lol. But I read a lot of posts by people who mention having spouses or live in households with family members. I was just wondering if anyone else here is like me - in their 20's, single, living alone. My idea of a great evening is snuggling with a heating pad on my shoulders while others my age are out drinking or whatever. Makes it hard to have any sort of social interaction, you know?
  2. Rafiki

    Rafiki New Member

    many others, unfortunately. I'm not one of them. Keep this bumped and they will find you.

    Peace out,
  3. jaba520

    jaba520 New Member

  4. Roxie14

    Roxie14 New Member

    I'm 27, newly married and newly diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I do agree that it's really hard to get myself moving and ready to go out sometimes. I especially hate it when friends from out of town come home for the weekend and want to meet up for a bit. I hate saying no because I really do miss them and want to see them but I just can't do it sometimes. I feel bad about it because I know they really probably don't understand how it is. I know how you feel, really.
  5. fkm

    fkm New Member

    Yep, 29 so count me in!

    I think CFS does present slightly different set of challenges to those in their 20's. It's a period when we should be out enjoying ourselves, socialising and getting the most out of life. I know exactly what you mean here. I too have had issues with socialising having before been one who went out quite often. Turning down countless social opportunities can often be a demoralising experience!

    Furthermore, an inability to socialise or reluctance to date decreases ones changes of finding a potential partner/spouse. These are often a source of support and comfort for those lucky enough to have them. Thus, I'm sure many in their 20's are increasingly likely to be single and can find themselves somewhat isolated. Mind you, there isn't the pressure of looking after a demanding family of 8 children or so!
  6. ajl338

    ajl338 New Member

    I'm 29 but i have had ME/CFS since i was 18 (after my 1st term at university)
    I live on my own which i actually enjoy. I used to live with my parents but it was hard work. They used to try and make me get out of bed at 8am (because it was good for me) and it was never quiet.

    The good part of living on my own is if i feel rubbish i can go to bed at 6pm and if i want to lay on the sofa all night i can and if i want to go out i can even if i come back 10 mins later without anyone commenting.

    Yes i miss out on a lot of social stuff but i am lucky enough to live where i work and there are a lot of other people living on site with me. Most arent paid very much so they cant afford to go out drinking every night so we have games nights so i end up going next door to play board games etc which is good because i can go home when i feel like it.

    When i was really ill and not living where i live now i found out there were actually quite a lot of people living close to me that had ME/CFS and we ended up organising a meet up at the pub in the afternoon. We had an orange juice and sometimes played pool. Other times we met up for a picnic in the park.I wasnt up to doing stuff in the evening but mid afternoon was ok.

  7. cczub

    cczub New Member

    Don't come here as much as I used to but figured I'd chime in. I'll be 30 in September. I am married with 2 children, one 8 y/o son and one 1 y/o daughter. I love them and my wife to death but most times I feel like a waste of space. When I was in my 20's (and still do)I too spent my nights in bed or on the recliner with a heating pad on my my back. While our friends were out partying I was at home. I try to go out and have a "wild" night with the friends and my wife but boy do I pay for it. Last time I had to call it quits and felt bad for my wife.

    Fibro is a bummer. You never know when it's really going to hit you hard and take you out of action. I have days that start off great and I think I'll take on the world only to have noon come around and knock me out.

    Hang in there. Luckily the meds I'm on (Lyrica, trazadone, vicoden (for break through) and fenttyal patch) let me lead a 70% normal life most of the time.
    I haven't been 100% since 2002....
  8. JD99

    JD99 New Member

    I think marriage is overrated at times, too. I'm not itching to be married or date much for that matter ("sorry honey I'd rather snuggle the heating pad" probably wouldn't do very well).

    I think my main thing is that I don't have anyone around me who has FMS, my age or otherwise, and what friends I still have - a lot dropped away when I got sick - mean well but don't understand it. One of them likes to joke that I'm the oldest young person he knows and that's not really a joke. On those days when I do actually feel I could do something it would be nice to have people I could go to that wouldn't want the night to turn into a drinking/smoking/loud torture run. I really, really hate it when someone pulls the "You're too young to not be..." or "You're young, you should be..." crap on me. I went to a concert last year and it took me like a week to recover.

    But I absolutely love living on my own - probably too much. I'd be in the grave right now if I hadn't gotten a place when I did, away from parents and noise and all of that. It's only a drag when cleaning needs to be done or in the winter when I need to get to work and there's ice and snow in the driveway.

    Thanks for answering, guys. :) It's nice to see you.
  9. MrLund

    MrLund New Member

    Hey , I am 24 ,read my story, I am going through the same thing as you did. More trouble than anything.

    I actually wanted to go back to school and get into med school, but that doesn't seem like it.. After graduating, I thought about going back to school, know going to school for next 10 years , just doesn't seem like it.

    everyday, I am up with headaches, fatigue, dizzy & light head and much more..

    I can't really communicate this disease with many people, because they don't seem to understand much about it.

    oh well, that is life...Hope one day, I should be fine...

    I am gonna try all kinds of herbal stuff, see which works... So far try this.

    Fish Oil
    Vitamin B Complex
    Oil of Oregano ( Tablets )
    Magnesium 500 mg ( not the oxide )
    Adderall ( Medicine, to keep you focus, if you need it )

    Avoid Vitamin C - it seems to activate immune system, more frequent causing fatigue.

    Those are for sure working pills.


  10. binxi

    binxi New Member

    i'm 29, single and living alone.
    i really want to get better soon so i can find a husband and procreate! i'm a bit scared of missing the boat, but i think i'm improving so hopefully i'm not out of the race yet!
  11. JoFMS

    JoFMS New Member

    Hi, I'm 29 but feel 90!

    I'm married but have had this DD since I was 23yrs so I do feell I have missed out on many things. My husband is 16yrs older than me and it's just as well as I feel his age. I couldn't cope with someone younger as they would have to much energy lol.

    I don't go out, go to bed at 8pm and generally act like an old woman and do miss the young me but maybe I will feel better one day and young again!
  12. JD99

    JD99 New Member

    I take fish oil, I started that a while ago, as well as vitamin B. I don't take any extra vitamin C except for what is in my multi-vitamin. I've noticed that if I eat or drink anything with citrus it causes a bad reaction - don't know why, I just noticed it and avoid it.

    I guess in a way I'm lucky I've always felt older than I am. Maybe because I'm an only child. I was running my own business from my home as well as my day to day job and that's really gone in a hole since I got sick. It's still here but I don't do anything to help it anymore. I think that bothers me a bit more than the whole dating thing. I don't mind being on my own (except when I need or want to do things I can't) but I do mind the things I'm passionate about being that much harder to pursue.

    I got a BA in psychology in 2004. I had thought then I might go for a masters but I definitely don't see that happening now.
  13. sillybee

    sillybee New Member

    JD -

    i can completely relate to where you are coming from. I am feeling much better off curled up with a book or falling asleep watching a movie rather than out partying with my friends.

    However, on the flip side of things... I am very recently diagnosed (as in yesterday!) and this is not exactly how I want to be spending my life. Considering that I am already making modifications to my routine, switching classes from on-campus to online due to inabilities to handle the sitting for three hours, makes this a hard pill. I am a crazy positive person but it is kind of difficult when you have so many dreams and goals for yourself and you can't get out of bed unless you know you have to go to work because it hurts so f-ing bad.
  14. babyk902

    babyk902 New Member

    i've had cfs for about four years now, came down with it when i was 18, but have been slightly improving a little bit each year (knock on wood) it's really tough especially at this age where all of my friends are always wanting to go out, and i can barely make it out one night a weekend, forget about drinking every night.. but im lucky to have a boyfriend who somewhat understands.
  15. hatbox121

    hatbox121 New Member

    I'm 27. I'm not single though. I am married with 2 kids. But I still know what you are saying. I should be in my prime but well I'm too tired and achy to do much of anything.
  16. MandaJ

    MandaJ New Member

    I'm a new member here, but hoping to find people who understand what I am going through because my husband doesn't and my close friends feel bad for me, but sympathy isn't what I need!

    I was diagnosed a few months ago after suffering for 7 years following a serious car accident that damaged my spinal column and my spinal cord. It took many visits to the doctor, massage therapist, chiropractor and even a neurologist to get things figured out.

    Most of the time my FM doesn't affect my life, but lately (thanks to added stresses of sick parents, spouses and work worries) it has been affecting every part of my life from tying my shoes to working a full 10-hour shift. Some days my hands hurt so bad I can barely work a stapler, much less write and edit all day.

    Somedays I feel so alone and wrapped up in my own pain that I forget others out there (my age, even!) know what this is like. So don't feel like you are alone! Maybe we can form an old maids with good books club to help us cope :)
  17. JD99

    JD99 New Member

    We could form a 20's with Heating Pads group. :p

    I write more than I read but my friend turned me onto a site called GoodReads where you can rate and list all the books you've read recently. Your friends do the same and everyone can look at each other's lists and see what's out there. I don't really know the rules of this board, if you're allowed to post website addresses or not, but it shouldn't be too hard to find. Of course, not knowing each other's email addresses, it'd be hard to find each other there, probably.

    I know it's hard especially when you're first diagnosed. In my case I was relieved when I first got it (which was about 4 months ago) because I'd been in and out of offices getting test after test for 3 years. It was nice to finally have a name to put to my problems after one doctor in particular kept telling me it was just IBS and stress and I ought to just take anti-depressants. The initial relief kind of wore thin the more it set with me, of course. You do start to feel you'll never get back to doing anything you want to do. It's a lot of give and take. I tell myself that I CAN do anything I want to do but in moderation or with as much preparation as possible. I don't always have the hang of that but I try to plan ahead - like when I went to that ooncert. I made sure I'd taken the next week off work because I knew I'd be wiped out.

    But there's more to life than clubbing and drinking and all those things. Small moments where you feel okay and see something beautiful in the world. Those small moments are really all life is about anyway, I think.

  18. JD99

    JD99 New Member

    It's on the fifth page already! :p
  19. bikrgrl

    bikrgrl New Member

    i'm not single but i wish i was. All not being single means is there is someone there expecting you to take care of them, to cook for them, to clean up after them. etc etc.
    Someone to complain that you are sore or tired or rolls his eyes when you say you are too sore to do something.
    I too feel robbed of the supposed "best years of my life"
  20. hopeliveshere

    hopeliveshere New Member

    I use to feel alone ...however I am getting my life back thanks to the Marshall Protocol. You might want to checkout and

    Take care all of you, Hopeliveshere