Anyone here a guardian for a sibling?

Discussion in 'Caregivers' started by EllenComstock, Oct 7, 2004.

  1. EllenComstock

    EllenComstock New Member

    I see that this board isn't as active as the FM/CFIDS board, but I am hopeful I will get a response. My parents have both passed away and I am guardian for my 47-year-old brother who lives in a group home a half-hour from me.

    He is off his medication again because he ran out. The doctor's office put him on new medication that Medicare doesn't cover so they were giving him sample. I found out several weeks later that he wasn't on anything again. It takes several weeks of being off meds before my brother gets worse again. He has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

    I am thinking of putting him in another group home, but there aren't a lot of good ones in my area and I may have to wait awhile. He just isn't getting good quality care at the home he's in. The owner doesn't believe in meds although he can see how bad he gets when he's not on anything. This is very frustrating.

    I have fibromyalgia, endometriosis, hypothyroidism, I.C. and irritable bladder syndrome so I have my plate full with my own health issues. I have another brother but he is bi-polar so not a lot of help. I also have a sister who hasn't shown a lot of interest in my brother (except to try and get his money from his inheritance).

    I guess I just needed to vent and see if there was anyone else here who is in a similar situation-guardian to a sibling and dealing with their own health issues.



    JEANSKI New Member

    My situation is not as bad...yet.
    My sister is bipolar and trying to get on disability, I too have FM and limited resources to help her. I feel like the only one. It has always been me and her against the world. But I need to be taken care of and can't seem to be superwoman and take care of her too. I feel so overwhelmed.

    Your situation is in a much more advanced state than mine. I hope you can research online to find out what is available for people with ocd. Like this website took some finding, i'm sure there has to be some info out there!

    Just remember to take one day at a time. Don't worry about what you cannot change right away but work constructively to remedy the situation and take care the best you can. I will be thinking about you.
    I know from the fm board you have really championed your cause at that you have won a few battles there, you can put some of that energy to helping your brother. You already have experiance as a fighter/survivor so you are not new to the battle. At least it won't be as painful as when you were first starting out with fighting w/ the fm. I guess what I am trying to say is you know how to fight these sort of battles so you hopefully can cut out some unnecessary stuff and get to the heart of the matter.
    I hear you Ellen.
  3. EllenComstock

    EllenComstock New Member

    and thanks for answering my post. I just got back to work from having surgery (no computer at home) so am now just getting your message. I can really feel for you with dealing with your sister. As you can see from my message, my other brother has bi-polar. Is your sister good about staying on her meds? Neither one of my brothers are.

    The group home I wanted to put Jim in that isn't too far from my house has closed. I talked to Jim's caseworker and there are no new group homes in this area. The other ones here are really bad. I may have to put Jim in a group home that is farther away. But for now, he will have to stay where he is. There are times when I have to put myself first. I figure if I don't take care of myself, then I won't be of any use to help Jim. And I really can't force him to take his meds. I talked to him yesterday and he is refusing to take them. He thinks the herbs will help him.

    I am still recovering from this surgery and have another surgery scheduled for next month. Yes, I think most of us here are used to fighting battles in dealing with our health issues. One of the positives that has come out for me having FM is that I am becoming much more assertive!

    Well, you take care. Write to me when you need to. We can certainly appreciate how difficult this is.