ARGUMENT WITH HUSBAND-COULD NOT MOVE

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by sharon5650, Aug 26, 2003.

  1. sharon5650

    sharon5650 New Member

    I MUST TELL YOU GUYS, I HAD A BIG ARGUMENT WITH MY HUSBAND THE OTHER NIGHT, IT LASTED FOR A GOOD PART OF THE NIGHT. AFTER THINGS SETTLED DOWN AND THE FOLLOWING DAY I REALLY COULD NOT MOVE. I TRIED TO GET UP IN THE MORNING, ONLY TO FIND OUT I HAD TO VOMIT, I WAS SO NAUSEA, AND I WAS IN SO MUCH PAIN PHYSICALLY I THOUGHT I WOULD HAVE TO GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM AGAIN. THE LAST TIME I WENT I HAD AN ARGUMENT WITH MY SON, I GOT UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND WAS VOMITING SO MUCH I COULD NOT STOP, THEN THE PAIN SET IN SO MAD I THOUGHT I HAD DEVELOPED BONE CANCER DURING THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. THE HOSPITAL KEPT ME OVER NIGHT, THEY SAID IT WAS VIRAL, AND PUT ME ON MORPHINE FOR PAIN, AND DID NOT LET ME GO UNTIL I COULD KEEP SOMETHING DOWN. I DON;T KNOW IF IT WAS THE STRESS OR THE FLU, I DID NOT HAVE A FEVER...........I AM SO FED UP WITH THIS THING, IT HAS CHANGED MY WHOLE WORLD, AND THE WAY I LOOK AT THINGS NOW, I FIND MY PERSONALITY HAS CHANGED ALOT. I KNOW LONGER FEEL LIKE BEING SOCIALABLE LIKE I ONCE DID. I DO NOT GO TO MANY PLACES NOW, BECAUSE I MIGHT GET TIRED AND WANT TO LAY DOWN IMMEDIATELY, OR A MOOD SWING MIGHT COME OVER ME. ANYWAYS I WON;T GIVE UP, I WILL PUT UP A FIGHT, JUST LIKE I DO WITH MY HUSBAND AND MY SON WHEN THEY WANT TO CHALLANGE ME, BUT SOMETIMES I AM SO TIRED OF EVERYTHING..............SHARON28
  2. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    You may have won the battle, but you are going to lose the war!

    All what you described is stress related, and you have to get your husband and your son to realized that causing you to get yourself that upset over whatever it is that you are fighting about is detrimental to your health.

    Whatever it was that caused the trouble, I am sure could have been resolved in a better way than arguing all night. You could have a stroke or heart attack from all that stress, that could happen to a perfectly healthy person.

    Its a wonder your doctor did not want to see your husband and your son to explain this to them.

    No treatment that you are on is going to help your health much, untill you get the stress out of your life.

    All of you seem to need some lifestyle changes, it won't work unless everyone helps either.

    I used to argue like you, but I have found out that its not the other guy I am hurting, but myself. So I manage to get things done, or resolved without the fighting. Rarely do we have a dispute like that anymore.

    I have even removed Toxic people out of my life because they angered me.

    My family, husband, son's and daughter do not go out of their way to upset me anymore. Those who do, I do not speak too these days.

    I have a DIL that is so toxic, that I only speak to her when absolutely necessary, I do not even vist them because of this. When she does come to my home, she is on my turf, therefore no problems. She knows better.

    Sit your husband and son down, have a talk with them. See if you can't get some understanding what all this is doing to you, or have your doctor do so.

    Take care, keep the temper down, remember you are only hurting yourself, not healthy people!

    Shalom, Shirl


    PS. I wanted to let you know, that I have never, in my life ran from a fight or an augment, I have a terrible temper, BUT I have LEARNED to control it. Because of this illness.
    I admire those people who can just walk away from a dispute, but it was a hard lesson for me to learn. I am in control now, not other people and not my hair-trigger temper either!

    Give it a try, you will be surprised how good it makes you feel when you can control yourself. Self disipline is the hardest lesson in this world to learn to do.
    [This Message was Edited on 08/26/2003]
  3. rockyjs

    rockyjs Member

    Sharon,

    I'll share a story that helps my friends and family understand my reactions. Several years ago we lived on a small farm that had a somewhat shallow well. If you turned on the water to get a drink you were fine, but if you did a load of laundry and then tried to take a shower it would spit out red mud. I think that's kind of how my body functions. I can get around okay normally, but add the least bit of stress (even happy stress) and I run out of "water." I gradually learned how to pace myself, but when I got into a stressful situation I would start vomiting and feel weak and sick for several hours or even days.

    We finally found out that whatever strain of virus caused my initial CFIDS, it apparently damaged part of my pituitary gland and I quit making vasopressin (which helps your circulatory system respond to stress). One of the ways the body compensates for low vasopressin is vomiting. Taking the replacement med (DDAVP) didn't really help, so I found other ways to cope.

    The best treatment I've found so far is to squeeze a small amount of fresh lemon juice into about 4 ounces of water and add salt. It doesn't sound very good, but it will stop the vomiting reaction for me. I have had to increase my salt intake considerably (no high blood pressure) during times of stress, sort of like with Addison's Disease, but I don't have clinical Addison's. The other combination I found (don't laugh - it's weird but it works) is one scrambled egg with salt and a very small piece of chocolate like from a Hershey's bar. Sometimes I throw it up, but then afterwards I'm fine and the "siege" is over. I have no idea why it works but it does.

    You may have to experiment to find your own fix - just get creative and don't worry about how it looks :)

    Jan