Back from vaca. think another flare is starting

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by CinCA, Mar 26, 2006.

  1. CinCA

    CinCA New Member

    Good vacation, bad return. Went with hubby and our 4 y.o. daughter on a work trip. Had a very nice time, and the warm temps and humidity did wonders for my general energy and the awful dry skin I've been fighting since our relo. I finally felt somewhat hydrated, although I've been back 24 hours and the skin is cracking and peeling again (esp. my hands...ouch! They hurt). Hubby and I still fought...I actually had much more fun the days he was in meetings for 12 hours...but our daughter did very well and was absolutely wonderful on the plane, which really was a nice treat (we've had her scream for hours on many a long-haul flight). So I think we are making progress, with her, at least. :)

    Of course, I bawled on the car ride home and had hit sensory overload within minutes of finally just getting to baggage claim (we flew out of a very crowded, crazy airport and got in late last evening). The trip solidified just how much I cannot stand where I am living and also really made my feelings about my marriage crystal clear. But with all the CFS flares and ill health, there is no way I can support myself or even be able to win my fair share in a custody battle, etc. if I were to file. It's a mess.

    I felt good during the trip, like I was maybe making progress re: detox, etc., but today's been another downward spiral. I'm hoping it's just jet lag, although it's a minimal time difference. We'll see how the week goes. I keep toying with calling the local FFC...but expenses are such an issue, and our insurance will be changing (as it stands now) from COBRA to a new policy in a couple of months. But I really dislike all this being stuck in limbo. For now, I just hope getting back into all the craziness doesn't throw me back into another flare...I can feel it trying to creep up on me.

    I hope everyone had a good week...sounds like it was challenging for many. I hope this coming week brings happiness and good things, really, for all of you. Thank you as always for your wonderful wishes and support.

    C.
    [This Message was Edited on 03/26/2006]
  2. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    i am glad you got some repreive while the hubby was working..soundslike the flight in general went very well...

    as for help for getting a divorce there may be some for you in a non profit org,

    and i know that many times when a woman files for divorce and she can not afford an attoney the judge will order the husband or the working parent to pay for the attorney fees...

    well i hope you can come up with the money for fcc that would be nice...

    well thinking of you and your daughter


    jodie
  3. CinCA

    CinCA New Member

    Back home, staying up way past my bedtime again. But thank you for your reply to my rambling post. Yes, the trip was so nice, and daughter and I saw lots of "critters"...sea turtles, humpback whales playing (so cool), "crabby crabs" (no, not me!), cows, horses, goats, sheep. We also took her to see the volcanoes (we were on the Big Island, Hawai'i), although of course hubby gave us the "look" and made comments when we picked a couple berries to offer Pele, the Hawai'ian goddess of fire/volcanoes. Belief in her is very strong in the islands, and being visitors there and staying in a hotel built on an old lava flow, I figured it wouldn't hurt to play it conservative and give Madam Pele a small token of our appreciation for keeping us safe. :)

    The trip really hit home the power of Mother Nature and how small we all are in the scheme of things. It was very healing for me on several levels, as I am big into fresh air, sunshine, and a simpler, "purer" life. I have to admit this evening I've had fantasies of leaving hubby and moving there (or some other Pacific island), getting some random job at a resort or something. Think it was the humidity (which felt so good on my dry skin), warm ocean, and loads of beautiful but empty (undeveloped) spaces that really hooked me. But it's very expensive there, so I don't see us getting back in the near term even for a vacation (we only went 'cause we could tag along for a work trip and found cheap flights).

    We tried to get out and explore and not hang out at the hotel too much, and it helped that our daughter made a little same-aged girlfriend who stayed almost as long as we were there. But it made coming home that much worse. I wonder if the CFS flares are linked to low moods/changes. I have such a hard time transitioning from one place to another now. It was really disorienting and disturbing coming "home" to our new house after the trip, even getting on the freeway and going the "wrong" way (we're now north of the airport instead of south). There had a flight leaving to go to our old local airport right before ours, and I was so sad, 'cause I miss our old place, more than anything I think because it's "safe" and familiar. I hate how "out of it" I feel so often now, although I know it's part of the whole CFS scheme of things, and how I just cannot process change at all. Again, at this point I am just trying to stave off a flare, so I should get to bed, wired as I am 'cause of the 2 hour time difference.

    Thanks much!
    C.
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    [This Message was Edited on 03/26/2006]