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Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by zion1971, Dec 23, 2005.

  1. zion1971

    zion1971 New Member

    Hi

    I am wondering if anyone knows a good counselor in South Carolina (Columbia) that I can see. I have suffered from CFIDS/FM for the past seven years. In fact, I became ill on Christmas morning 1998. I have never been the same. I am married and have one child. The problem is I have no emotional support. I feel so lonely. I fight depression everyday.

    My husband has stayed with me. He admits that he feels sorry for me and may have left a while ago but I have no one. I am only close to my parents on a superficial level. I cannot count on them to take care of me if needed. I have had to be more of a grown up than they have at times. My mom betrayed me in the past, and though I have forgiven and her and moved on, I cannot count on her to really be there for me.

    The majority of my family "pretends" that I am fine. They never ask how I am doing. Over the years, I have missed sooo many events, but my family acts as if I am away because I have a cold or something.

    My husband supports me and I am thankful. He just can't give any emotional support. He is the most compassionate man I know until it comes to me. He just doesn't show any emotions or feelings. We also don't discuss my illness.

    Friends have told me that I just need counseling. They can't understand why a doctor can't fix me.

    I HAVE NO EMOTIONAL SUPPORT! I am so lonely most days. Support groups in my area form and then dissolve. I am depressed and don't know how my life will ever change. I had to quit my job and feel like a shell of my former self.

    I do need counseling at this point. How do you survive when you can't count on one human being to "be there" with you while you suffer. I feel guilty because I know that others are suffering more than I am. But some days I can't even lift my arms. I sit on the sofa like a zombie.

    For those of you connected to the SC area, I am desperate for resources or referrals.
    [This Message was Edited on 12/23/2005]
  2. lolee

    lolee New Member

    I can SO relate to your no emtional support situation. I am sorry. so truly sorry that you are going through this. I am not in SC, but in CA. Do you have insurance? I was truly blessed by God when I found my counsler. I looked up on the internet my insurances' providers and printed out a page for each one: e.e.: their specialties, areas of practice, etc. picked off the things that applied to me and "she" pretty much chose herself! LOL

    I was sexually abused and neglected as a child although I have a gap of about 7 years and do not remember the actual acts. I have also been raped and stabbed (this was in ONE event, yuck!) and have coninually chosen men who are just not available emotionally . . . . .so . . . . .now, along with my PTSD dx I now have FMS, have suffered for years "but it was all in my head" or "your just faking it for attention (shut up Mom! LOL)

    Be your own best friends, do not feel guilty! I am very neew to this board but am AWESTRUCK every day I come here to read and it helps!! You have stumbled on to THE MOST LOVING neighborhood in the world!!!!

    hugs, prayers, virtual shoulder to lean on,

    Lolee
  3. dononagin

    dononagin New Member

    You have made a good start by coming to this forum.. for most of us we don't know anyone that we see in "real" life that truly understands what we are dealing with.

    We are lucky to find support here. I think my on-line friends with cfs and fibro are truly the only ones who understand what I go through.

    I try to come here rather than whine at work or drive my family insane with my whining.. I know though they may care they become numb after a while to "I don't feel good"...

    it's like after a while they are immune to it and they can't really understand unless they have been through it.

    I listen to my co-workers talk about a lady who works here who has a chronic pain condition and they act like she is a hypochondriac.

    They don't understand because it is not their reality. However it is ours.

    As far as finding a couselor, you may want to call your local mental health and ask for a referral. Also your regular doctor could help you find one as well. My Rhumie said if it ever got too much for me there are counselors that specialize in living with chronic pain.

    Zion, your truly not alone. Hang around and get to know the board. There is really some good support here.

    Hugs!!
    dona
  4. dononagin

    dononagin New Member

    I see that you are also new here.. Welcome!!