Calling Seniors & the "Aging Process"............

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by caroleye, Jan 24, 2006.

  1. caroleye

    caroleye New Member

    Having dealt with this illness in different stages for over 20 years, I'm now looking severely at the "aging" process.

    In my 60's, and I never had a rolemodel to see how they do it.

    Having had a near death experience, and being angry at having to come back doesn't help my motivational level either. It feels like hell not only to have to deal with all of our illness symptoms, but then add "aging" onto it.

    Our society has been so youth-oriented, that I don't think many of us learned that path.

    Curious as to how you're doing it. I don't have a supportive family, so that's "out".

    Thanks & LIGHT*************carole
  2. greatgran

    greatgran Member

    I can't offer any suggestions except relate to how you feel..I am 63 and never thought about how to deal with aging and I must admit I am having a hard time dealing with the aging issue..I get very depressed thinking about it..Wondering were time went and what to do now..

    I got out some old pictures and was going to do each of my children, gran and great an album and got so depressed I started crying had to put them back in the boxes..
    There were so many happy memories I just want things to be like they use to be..

    I wonder if its the dd that causes this because I see people everyday that is my age and older and seem happy go lucky, the way I was years ago..I do not have anyone to teach me how to do this or would teaching be the word..

    Will be watching the post and hope for some good advise, sorry all I can do is relate...

    greatgran

  3. CATHYRG

    CATHYRG New Member

    hi, i too am in my early sixties,but i am much more accepting and also enjoying life. i am retired.
    i see very little difference in how i feel today as to how i felt 6 years ago. i did my mourning for my losses at that time. example - energy-memory loss and the aches and pains that had stated at age 53. i refuse to give in or up. this year i have been hospitolized 2 times for blood clots and heart problems.this is not a perfect world for anyone. we need to have faith,put one foot in front of the other and keep moving.....having said that, today is not a good day for me so i will be resting for a few hours this afternoon and hope tomorrow will be better,most of us have good days and bad days we should exercise as much as possible to keep the natural endorophens going and keep the depression in check. i do volunteer work and also i am on our local library board. i travel when the opportunity and $$ permits. cathy ps i am sensitive to most meds and other then placquinel i take nothing but tylenol occasionally. my pain tolerance is being tested daily.
  4. janieb

    janieb New Member

    Ladies and Gentlemen - My fibro began 18 years ago when I had our 3 year old granddaughter and my 70 year old mother with alzheimers living with us. My father also had alzheimers, but needed to be in a nursing home. I, also, had a career that required about 50 hours a week, plus evening meetings and some travel. For three years they told me my pain was depression, and since there was plenty of reason for depression, I believed them. Later, when Dr. Nye, who is suppose to be well-known on that subject, diagnosed me with fibro (all 18 points), it was a relief. Realizing I wouldn't be able to work much longer, I was able to negotiate an early retirement contract and that was a blessing.

    Now there is just my husband myself living in our house, but my granddaughter who is now 17 mentioned to me the other day that "you never feel good." That was in response to her request to go shopping. I felt so bad because she's right! There has never been a time when she could remember me feeling well enough to do the things she wants to do for very long. Now that's depressing.

    However, I'm fortunate to have great support on both sides of our families. Sometimes I don't think my husband realizes my limitations like he should, but he's beginning to. Yes, I look fine, but that doesn't mean I can pull myself together and go shopping 35 miles away; or that I can stand around Menards for an hour while he browses.

    I'm trying to find a doctor in the Eau Claire, Wisconsin area who has used The guai protocol by Dr. St. Armand, but have had no success. I also realize that at my age, I will probably die before detoxing. Seem to be losing out so fast. We're very fortunate to have health insurance supplied by my previous employer and a good pension system,so I shouldn't complain. But, I feel like crap.

    This is the first group of people in my age range who are in my situation and for you, I'm very grateful. Thanks for listening and bless you all.

    Mary
  5. Dee50

    Dee50 New Member

    Hi there Carole,
    All I know is that my Mom is 70 and she does tons more than I can do and her mind is in about the same place as mine.

    I've had this stuff since I was 16 and I'm now 50. I must say than I'm not dealing with this aging deal very well. It seems to me that my mind should be sharper than my Mom's being that she is 70 and I'm only 50 but...that's not the case and boy does she have me physically beat and she has beat cancer 2 times. Wish I had more of her genes!!

    I seem to just keep getting sicker nowdays. Able to do less and less as time marches on..
    Take care,
    Dee50
  6. Adl123

    Adl123 New Member

    Dear Carol,
    I'm soon to be 69. My mom died 6 1/2 years ago, and that really impacted me. I took care of her for the last 20 or so years of her life. At the end I was too sick,so , shortly before she died (as it turned out) I had to put her in a skilled nursing facility. She taught me a lot.

    Because I'm pretty much alone, I'm free to do what I can without anyone having expectations, pretty much. I live in a little cottage that I hope to remain in, that has no stairs and is very small, so it is easy to navigate.

    I've gotten an assistance dog to help me, and I have friends who check on me from time to time.

    Financially, I don't have much money, but I've written a living will, and a regular will, and have given instructions as to what to do when I die, to my friends and relatives, and doctor (do not resusitate). I have those instructions taped on the inside of the refrig.. I also have my meds and allergy list taped there , too.

    My "funeral" plans are taped on the inside of the frig.. (a crowded place - LOL)

    Is this what you meant? When I can save up the money I hope to insert one of those bath tubs that one can sit in, into my bathroom. Otherwise, I don't need to remodel. If it turns out that I can't afford to put in a new tub, (and I can no longer lift my leg to get it over the side), I plan to have a "hole" cut into the side of the tub that's there, treat it as a stand-up shower, and put a chair in it. I bought this cottage with my old age in mind.

    I purchased a collapsable scooter that I can put in the car and use for the mall, Costco, etc... I inherited a regular scooter that I'm not using now, but am keeping if there is some time I cannot drive.

    Spiritually, I'm praparing for my death by honing my meditation skills,trying to set things right with those I've offended, and am doing what little I can for the elderly in my town. It is very little, but every little bit helps, I guess. I would love to help out with children, like at the school, but I need to keep away from them, as they are very generous virus carriers, and I cannot take the chance of getting an upper respiratory infection.

    Well, I hope this helps. My death has been om my mind ever since my mom died, so I've been preparing little by little. It's a very peceful and happy thing,(the preparing for death, I mean). I get depressed whenever I'm reminded that I can't do the things I've waited all my life to do, or the things I've been looking for, and which I've finally found, but can't participate in.Some days I can't even stand up straight or walk erect, I'm so depressed and tired. If I could lay down I would,( and curl up in a blanket). But I can't even do that.


    P.S. I put a little money in the bank and am leaving it there, in case I need home care. I'm also figuring out what things I can sell should I have to. Our town has a hospice, and I plan on contacting them to find out if they have home care, and if I can pay little by little, in avance.

    I was lucky enough to have an out of body experience after a surgery, a while ago, an it haas given me great comfort and hope. I look on it as a blessing, as it allowed me to strengthen my faith and gave me comfort.

    Take care of yourself,
    Hugs,
    Terry

    [This Message was Edited on 01/24/2006]
  7. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Had been working part-time for 20 years. Got CFS at 40.

    So now I have lots of free time, but no energy or money to take advantage of it. No big change really. I feel the disease made me prematurely old 20-some years ago.

    About the only good thing I've noticed about old age is that I no longer worry about what other people think. I just don't care anymore.
  8. Yucca13

    Yucca13 Member

    I am fortunate to have a great husband to share my older years with - have two great kids and two of our kids have not spoken with us for 10 months so that hasn't helped the overall scheme of things.
    My mother is 85 and going strong - no illness to speak of. She does way more than me and can outwalk me any day.
    Lately I've had a constant headache (blinding for most of the day actually) and am really getting discouraged. I go to the pain doc and an ENT doctor tomorrow (ENT for the first time to see if he can figure it out). I've had pain for so many years that I am very grateful when I have a few weeks of feeling good.
    I'll be 59 soon and don't look anywhere near as bad as I feel, so that is a blessing.
    Guess we will have to muddle through and take it one day at a time.
    Any time you need some support, you can write to me.
    Val
  9. darude

    darude New Member

    I'm 55 but feel 95!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was well at 52 and felt great then this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! boy have things changed. Oh well just soldier on I guess. Can't imagine what it will be like in ten years.