Can fam. doc. be in over his head?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by ireland813, Oct 15, 2002.

  1. ireland813

    ireland813 New Member

    Hi...I haven't written in a while. Not too much to say. I'd been waiting for my psych appointment at the end of November and in the meantime keep meeting with my counsellor and see my family doc every two weeks. I thought I had been doing quite well. Still not working but doing small tasks everyday, pushing myself to do more and more. I am helping my sister with her baby, going for walks, reading, trying some crafts etc. Nothing huge, but enough to keep me busy. I actually felt that last week I did a little too much. Once I reached a point during the day that I was tired and felt I couldn't do anymore I would do one more thing. By the weekend I was exhausted and on a bit of a downturn. You know what the roller coaster is like.

    Well, today I plummeted. I saw my family doc for a check up and he blasted me. He asked me what I had been doing and I told him how I'd been keeping busy. He said I need to quit sitting around doing nothing all day. It was if he hadn't even listened! I told him that I was trying meditation for anxiety but I still had small attacks. I told him how overwhelmed I was feeling just with everyday things. For example when I wash the dishes I notice how filthy the sink is, then the cupboards, then the stove etc. I had finally trained myself to leave things and am now trying to do one thing at a time without "freaking out". His response was "well you can't be a slob either". When I told him that my anxiety and worry gets so bad that I think how if I just had some kind of "accident" it would all go away he told me not to worry so much. I told him I was trying cognitive therapy and that it's tough to break these thought patterns immediately he told me that probably 80% of what I think about isn't a problem. He said stop worrying so much about things. You are one of those people that just think too much.

    Two weeks ago he raised my paxil to 40mg. The past week I have had to take 1mg of ativan a day. Once at bedtime and then when I wake up in the middle of the night. He says I should be better in 2 weeks and plan to be back at work at the end of the month. I do not feel my confidence or my self esteem is anywhere near ready for that. It takes all I have to get through my days the way they are now, with small tasks. I feel as though he didn't listen to a word I told him. My counsellor told me I am on the right track. Why can't my family doc see this? I was devasted and felt horrible about myself. Doubting that I'm trying hard enough to get better. I was hoping my family doc would just monitor me until the psychiatrist was able to see me and better determine what course of action I should be on. Isn't a possibilty that I'm not even on the right meds?

    I'm sorry for rambling but I was really thrown for a loop today. Any suggestions would be welcome. Thank-you.
  2. ireland813

    ireland813 New Member

    Hi...I haven't written in a while. Not too much to say. I'd been waiting for my psych appointment at the end of November and in the meantime keep meeting with my counsellor and see my family doc every two weeks. I thought I had been doing quite well. Still not working but doing small tasks everyday, pushing myself to do more and more. I am helping my sister with her baby, going for walks, reading, trying some crafts etc. Nothing huge, but enough to keep me busy. I actually felt that last week I did a little too much. Once I reached a point during the day that I was tired and felt I couldn't do anymore I would do one more thing. By the weekend I was exhausted and on a bit of a downturn. You know what the roller coaster is like.

    Well, today I plummeted. I saw my family doc for a check up and he blasted me. He asked me what I had been doing and I told him how I'd been keeping busy. He said I need to quit sitting around doing nothing all day. It was if he hadn't even listened! I told him that I was trying meditation for anxiety but I still had small attacks. I told him how overwhelmed I was feeling just with everyday things. For example when I wash the dishes I notice how filthy the sink is, then the cupboards, then the stove etc. I had finally trained myself to leave things and am now trying to do one thing at a time without "freaking out". His response was "well you can't be a slob either". When I told him that my anxiety and worry gets so bad that I think how if I just had some kind of "accident" it would all go away he told me not to worry so much. I told him I was trying cognitive therapy and that it's tough to break these thought patterns immediately he told me that probably 80% of what I think about isn't a problem. He said stop worrying so much about things. You are one of those people that just think too much.

    Two weeks ago he raised my paxil to 40mg. The past week I have had to take 1mg of ativan a day. Once at bedtime and then when I wake up in the middle of the night. He says I should be better in 2 weeks and plan to be back at work at the end of the month. I do not feel my confidence or my self esteem is anywhere near ready for that. It takes all I have to get through my days the way they are now, with small tasks. I feel as though he didn't listen to a word I told him. My counsellor told me I am on the right track. Why can't my family doc see this? I was devasted and felt horrible about myself. Doubting that I'm trying hard enough to get better. I was hoping my family doc would just monitor me until the psychiatrist was able to see me and better determine what course of action I should be on. Isn't a possibilty that I'm not even on the right meds?

    I'm sorry for rambling but I was really thrown for a loop today. Any suggestions would be welcome. Thank-you.
  3. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    labelled you as a crock and he has a mindset that you are exaggerating and/or crazy....I've seen and been employed by his type. You are giving every warning signal as a person in crisis and he is neglecting you. PLEASE, seek other help...don't subject yourself to that kind of abuse. I KNOW doctors and he has incorrectly pegged you as a loser and you do not deserve this. The comment about the accident worries me...are you having suicidal thoughts? PLEASE know that there WILL be better days and better months ahead; it just takes time with these chronic illnesses. I feel that God does let us see sunshine in the midst of the clouds.....please talk to us and let us support you. You don't need to think the M.D.= GOD...he is a pr_ _ _ in my book and I'm pissed for you!!!!
    OK, I'm on a tangent, I'm leaving...for some reason, I feel very protective of you....take care of yourself and let us help!

    Love,
    Kady
  4. ireland813

    ireland813 New Member

    Thank-you so much for your kind words. They are truly appreciated! I will continue to post here. It is nice to have a place to go for support!
  5. karen2002

    karen2002 New Member

    The post above is quite correct, in my thinking. I too, had a primary physician that was condescending, and just plain gave me h&^*. When I told him symptoms, he would raise his eyebrows, in disbelief. He would throw a few tacky comments in, and then at the end of the appointment, he would say sarcastically, "Well, What
    do you want me to do for you". Needless to say, if he didn't know the correct answer to that, was "Make me well", then I needn't ever see him again.
    You do not have to put up with this from a physician. There are physicians out there, who are truly concerned about your plight, who are interested in taking on patients that are challenging. You must find someone who is willing to be an advocate for you. Use the resources here, such as the Good Doctors List, ask Support Group members whom they recommend, find out when you locate a Doctor, how many patients he/ or she treats with the same conditions, as you.
    The answer to a patient who says something about their own demise--is not and never will be....Don't worry.
    Please let us know how you are doing--
    Karen
  6. TracyV

    TracyV New Member

    Kadywill and Karen, This doctor is doing you a disservice. He is causing you more anxiety than you already have. I hope you will find another doctor to give your hard earned money to, you should not be paying someone to make you feel this way. So many of us just let these doctors talk to us any kind of way, when most of us would not even let our love ones talk to us like this. Maybe you should talk to your conserlor about this, and they could recomend someone better to treat your problem. I think when I found a new doctor I would let him know why.
    Hugs,
    Tracy

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