Can not keep up with housework. Anyone know of help available?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by fmfriend, May 9, 2014.

  1. fmfriend

    fmfriend Member

    I have been down for a while, in so much overwhelming pain and bone crushing fatigue. I'm pushing myself just to get out of bed each day. I haven't been able to get out in weeks, even to go to the grocery store never mind being able to clean my house. My husband helps out so much ,bless his heart, but he can't do what i need done. The stress of the disorganization, household chores undone ect.. are adding to my pain, stress, and general lack of well being. Being that most of us face these issues I wondered if anyone has found any way of attaining household help. I would think there would be a way to have medicare help since I have been deemed permanently, totally disabled under their criteria yet in the past even when I was in the wheel chair I was only able to have a nurse, home healthaide for personal care which didn't include house work, Even a homemaker could only care for my shower area and make my bed. I need more help then that. I have major organization issues, due to not being able to do activities of daily living, days turn into months worth of things to be tackled and I just can't do it. I'm feeling so frustrated adding to the exhaustion and pain. With little sleep my cognitive function is so bad that if I do have a day when I'm physically a bit more able to try to accomplish something I can't manage to focus well enough for long enough and end up pulling things out only to end up with a worse mess. I try to do one area at a time, take the elephant on one bite at at time as they say, but with the Lyme disease, ME/CF and Fibromyalgia the brain and body are just not able to carry it out to fruition. I am not able to attend a church anymore or I would turn there, where I used to help others in my situation but I have humbly reached out only to be told I have to be a member. I can't afford to hire someone so I don't know what to do. Has anyone else successfully been able to find help with house maintenance? I have called elder services and another agency I can think of. Thanks in advance ~ Blessings ~ Sally Sorry this is so long.
  2. Soul*

    Soul* Well-Known Member

    Sally, I hope you find a way that works for you or find someone in your neighbourhood that can help you out.
    I have had help in the past that I still had to partially pay for but am in a different country so with other rules.
    And since the person didn't show up half of the time it was still like paying full charges.

    For me having help and all the stress that came with it (people not showing up, people showing up with a heavy nicotine smell around them though non smoker requested, people running of in the middle of chores, people doing the chores half heartedly, and simply having people over for several hours every week, was worse for my health then not having help and learning to cope with not having chores done that I normally did or with doing them in a minimized way.

    There is a thread on the homebound bedbound forum called household energy savers where we try to collect ways that work for others to get things done on low energy.

    Good luck finding a way to improve your situation. If you haven't googled yet on volunteers and your area then you might want to do that to see if there are more organisations you could contact or maybe social services could redirect you? Personally I feel it might be better to find a volunteer then a payed service even if medicare would help pay for it because it seems that often many people are just working in the cleaning industry because they need the money but can't get another job and don't really want to do the work and often do not get any training or guidance from their employer in what it means to clean and be around people with illnesses either whilst those volunteering choose to be where they are and really want to help.
    Last edited: May 9, 2014

    CHARNAE Member

    Hi Sally, sorry u having a hard time finding dependable, affordable help. I gave up on that long ago. My only answer to the household was to first declutter which I'm still doing, one area at a time. The less stuff, the less u have to worry about cleaning. My daughter came earlier last year & did my closet. I've been giving away & making donating boxes. Goodwill or a friend will pick those things up. I'm doing the best I can. She bought me wipes that I use to spot clean. Otherwise I make a spray bottle of vinegar(due to chemical sensitivity) to clean kitchen/bathroom. For the floors I use a swifter spray mop. The outdoors stuff is hired help. I use grabbers & other Help items. The key is I basically use one room & keep it along w/bath & kitchen picked up which makes it easier to maintain(what I use I clean afterwards). I never bring junk mail into the house. I check it & throw it in trash on porch so it won't become clutter. One step at a time, rest & get to it when I can. Take Gentle Care~
    Soul* likes this.