longer. I am so exhausted and I hurt so bad. I am going through the worst flare of my life and I can't go on like this anymore. I have appt to see that doctor 2 weeks from today but I don't think I can hang on that long. This morning my mom called me as usual and asked me how I was feeling and I told her worse than yesterday. She immediately starts in with don't you think if you were to get up and get busy and stop sitting there dwelling on it, don't you think if you got busy and clenaed your house, clean out your closets, clean out your cabinets, rearrange your furniture, wash all your inside windows, get off your A$$ and do something instead of just sitting there........ I just started crying, mom don't you think I would be up doing if I could?? I want to go back to work, I need to go back to work. I would love to be doing anything except sitting here/lying here in so much dam pain. I can't go on like this. I told John yesterday I want to be burried with my 2 favorite cats; Shelby and Elsa and my favorite ferret Mr. Beepers. He was trying to kid me out of my mood and I told him, no I can't take this anymore, I am going to bring this to a screeching hault. This is not living, this is pure torture. I don't think anyone can help me anymore.