Dang it , I sure wrote a tear jerker didn't I.

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by rosemarie, Jul 1, 2006.

  1. rosemarie

    rosemarie Member

    When I sit here and write how I feel I don't stop to read what I write and I don't often go back to see what I did write. So after I read all of your posts that made me cry too , I read what I wrote and I cryed too.
    I tell you what happend to the little girl who went looking for friends , she found some and lived in the same place for all her childhood. That young mother who loved to hold her babies and yes they did grow up to fast. Now holds her grandbaby on her shoulder when he will let her.

    I was told by my daughter to quit telling them to stop growing up so fast because they wanted to grow up to do things and see what was out there for them.
    Now my yongest has a baby of her own and she told me that he is growing up to fast and he won't stop it. She went on to tell me that she understood how I felt watching her go from a tiny baby to a grown woman with a babe of her own. She found out a few months ago that she is expecting again, although she was not thrilled as she wanted to wait a little longer as my grandson is 15 months old. She is happy now and is almost ready for this again. She is more understanding now that she has a child and that has helped me so much.
    I love it when she calls me just to tell me what my grandson did that day and how mad she was at him ,and he looks at her with his big blue eye's and she just can't stay mad at him for long. She shares her life with me her joys her sorrows the misunderstanging that she has with her husband and I understand what she is going through. I wish that I could make her problmes go away but I can't . Just as I can't make what I have leave me too.

    I have to accept that there is life out there though it may not be the life I thought it would be. It is still there for me to find and enjoy.

    I still have a little hand to hold as he wants to walk around out side. I still have 3 daugthers who are so beautiful and dear to me. NO my life is not what I wanted it to be. But maybe this will not be as bad as it could be after all.

    I still have a good husband who loves me so and daughters that love me too. So even though I have to much pan in my life I still have lots of love in it too.
    Thanks for your posts, I really had tears running down my face, I didn't know that you could care for some one that you never met before. So thank you all so much.
    may God bless you all and know that you are loved.
    Rosemarie
  2. optimistic1

    optimistic1 New Member

    I have been reading your posts and your feelings have affected me so. I feel you are going through a period we all have to go through with this DD. But, you are recognizing it and are aware of it and this makes it all the more painful.

    I too was very aware of what I was experiencing and this causes such pain. Others go through this passage and aren't even aware of it.

    In my opinion (for what its worth) we all must grieve for what we used to be and for what we have "lost." We lose our old selves and must adapt to becoming someone new.I've been told that this grieving process is very healthy and necessary before we can go on to the next stage of our lives.

    Our children and families must know how difficult this is. We certainly recognize it just as much as they do---even more. Hopefully their love for us is unconditional.

    We are very aware of what they have lost and even feel guilty for it. This loss is not our choice and surely they must see this. I hope you can hold your head up high and be proud of how you are coping. You are doing your very best. You have always been there for your children and husband and now they must be there for you. Works both ways.

    This has turned into a much longer post than I intended and I hate to tell others how to feel. I just speak from experience, For me it has been and is still quite a journey but so worth it. I have reached this point with some most valuable guidance.

    I send you love and wish you much luck. This new revelation is so important for us to accept and to feel well.

    Arlene