Just writing to say hi. I'm worried about my 'communicating'. That you might be feeling really hurt. I did the best that I could, but that doesn't mean it wasn't flawed. Just sending my love and prayers. I wish there was some better way of doing things than human fallacy! I don't like being "open and honest"! It's so risky. I wish I knew how you were feeling! I'm so sorry if I went about things the wrong way, but it was the only way I knew to try and clear things up. I hope you know how much you mean to me, how much richness you've brought into my life. How much laughter, and strength from your prayers. Finding a really good friend is so rare, and I hope that you will forgive any mistakes in judgement that I made. I have the 'brillo rat and scary stories' night printed out, it was one of the most fun times I've had in years. And a thread from around Christmas time under "Bah humbug", when I started out really depressed, and ended up laughing my head off with all the jokes and racing around we were doing. And, I have the responses to my poem 'In Desperation, that you and Georgia commented on. It encouraged me immensely how much you received from it. So, I see a mistake I made! I shouldn't have said "all", since I have some really valuable ones. And at home I have journals that I've filled for the past 20 years. And about 6 notebooks of pieces of poetry, that I need to finish if I ever get off my butt! Plus I have stuff under my own name to print out. I'm in an ocean of riches. I just need to listen to the Holy Spirit about what to do next. I just really lack confidence, and then there's the PTSD monster, which I picture as this creature from mythology called the Hydra, which had 9 heads, and when you cut one off, another grew back. TTYL, going to rest a bit.