do I have to beg the doctor

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by aquabugs, Aug 17, 2005.

  1. aquabugs

    aquabugs New Member

    to put me on short-term disability or what? I've had increasing problems with the fatigue all summer. In July, I worked less than half the time I was supposed to be working and August, so far, is worse. I have tried to talk to the rheumy about giving me some time off to recuperate while he tries this medicine and that medicine to see if anything will work. He told me quickly, "You can't just stop working!!" without letting me finish a sentence. I AM NOT asking to stop working...I am asking for a break before I collapse. I'm just about to the end of my rope here! I worked one day last week and it knocked me on my behind for a solid week. I finally came back in today but I am weak and shaky and so tired I can't concentrate...this after sleeping for about 9 solid hours last night.

    What have y'all experienced? It seems like my doc takes it as a personal affront if I ask for time off. He won't suggest it even when he knows I am missing more that half my time and he agrees it is serious at this point. However; I am clueless here. Must I spell it out to him? I have used all of my paid leave and now must take unpaid days when I can't work. I am just about to the end of my FMLA leave and still have 2 months to go before I can get anymore FMLA hours. I just want to scream!! (But I won't!) :)

  2. lvjesus

    lvjesus Member

    what you need for short term disability for work. Here is the up front news, which you probably know. Short term disability kicks in usually after 7 days and lasts for about 26 weeks.

    Since you are talking about an absense for something "undefined" (no operation, etc) you probably will need some sort of doctor's note.

    How about your primary care doc?

    Sonya
  3. aquabugs

    aquabugs New Member

    I am going to just lay it all out to that doc on Friday. My hubby is extremely worried about me and is going with me for moral support. My family knows that missing this much work or just wanting to get out of working is not like me. My boss knows I am not one to just slack off. She sees me as a hard worker (she told me so today :) But even her support of me can only go so far if the main office decides to fire me for excessive absences. It's just the doc that is not getting the picture. He isn't even bothering to make many notations in my file it seems...he put in "CFS - poorly controlled." As far as his recommendations: "avoid stressful situations and practice good sleep hygiene." I am sleeping just fine on most nights the last few weeks and my stress has lessened. But for some reason my fatigue has not let up...it's gotten progressively worse.

    The short term disability I have kicks in after I have been off for 30 days. Meaning, as soon as the doc says I will be off work for more than 30 days, I can apply for it. I spoke with the lady in HR about it recently and she was very kind and even went ahead and sent me the forms in case I need them. My job is very understanding too...it's just this fool doctor. Problem is, this rheumy is in the same clinic with my PCP, which is why I ended up with this idiot. The good news is the PCP gave me a referral today to the Diagnostic Clinic of Houston, so MAYBE I might find a doc who is more knowledgeable. I thought this rheumy, since he is relatively young, would be less likely to adopt an "all in my head" stance. Guess I was wrong!

    Thanks for listening...I'm just so frustrated. I can keep my pain under pretty good control most of the time...but the fatigue is stealing my life away and the doc doesn't seem too awfully concerned. *sigh*
  4. lovethesun

    lovethesun New Member

    that you not working makes him a failure because he can't control the disease.I'd definetly look for another Doctor
  5. tamsyn

    tamsyn Member

    in my experience, docs don't understand the difference between the words 'tired' and 'fatigued'. I've told docs that I am so fatigued I can't lead a normal life and all I get is a noncomprehending look and a shrug. I have also been told "Everyone is tired at this time of year" (it was January.) What -- he thought I was referring to a New Year's hangover or what -- ???? So what might work for you is to give really specicif examples of what you mean by the word fatigued ie. "When I do such and such, then I am in bed for x number of hours/days to recover". Or, you could give a list to the doc of specific things you can no longer do. Or, you could give a list of the specific symptoms you get when you have over-done it. Good luck with this!
    tamsyn
  6. Diagoras

    Diagoras New Member

    When I was fatigued last year for a different reason (sleep apnea), I told my doctor that I felt exhausted just from taking a shower. She didn't have any trouble comprehending that and I had no problem with her not taking me seriously. (In fact, she was smart enough to consider sleep apnea even though I don't snore!) You may just need to change doctors, though.
  7. lvjesus

    lvjesus Member

    you are right. No one understands the difference. Yes, I know someone said right after that her doc does. I don't really mean EVERYONE in the entire world, I mean most everyone. No one at my house understands it. I am not bitter over that anymore. I just take it as fact.

    I try to explain it in different ways to try to help them get it. Fatigue is I-have-only-the-energy-to-lay-on-the-couch. No energy to reach for the remote to change the channel, no energy to get up to go to the bathroom. No energy to turn over. My body tingles when I lay down like sand settling into the bottom of the hourglass and I don't want to even blink.

    That ain't tired. Tired is whew, I am beat, I gotta rest for a minute. LOL

    Sonya