Do you ever feel different from other "nonfibro" girls at work?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Chelz, Mar 17, 2006.

  1. Chelz

    Chelz New Member

    Do any of you feel so different from your co-workers? I am 40 years old, work only part time at a local hospital in the medical records department.

    I'm not married, have no children, and live at home with my parents because I can not afford to live on my owen. I have fibro, TMJ, migraine headaches, bulging disks, you name it. My job is physically and mentally demanding and then I come home to elderly parents with their own problems. I try not to talk about my home life and obviously, not my health to anyone at work. I feel so isolated at time, even though I try to have a sence of humor and do the best I can.

    I just feel so out of place when I hear the girls in the office have so much more of a life then I do. I'm trying hard not to feel sorry for myself, but it's so difficult at times. Even the older women who work there seem to have better energy and a better memory than I do.

    This had been weighing on me heavily for the past year or so, I haven't even been on these boards as often as I used to because of fatigue.

    I currently do not have a good doctor. When I was going to the doctors, they just made me worse. They would patronize me and make me feel like all they could give me were antidepressants, pain pills or muscle relaxers. All three of these drugs did SO MUCH MORE HARM to me than not taking anything at all.

    I wish I could quit my job, (or find a GOOD MAN) I'm just tired of hearing about the girls at work who have good health, or nice homes, or children or just a normal life, or at least what I perceive as a normal life. Does anyone else feel this way? I do have some good friends that I hold on too, my parents can be great, and my sister and young nephew is a God send to me. I try to hold on to these things to try and feel normal with my life.

    Sorry this post is so long, just had to vent. Hugs to all of you, Chelz.


  2. lenasvn

    lenasvn New Member

    This DD is alienating. I can totally relate to you! The things we can't do, all the people we don't have energy to see, or get to know.

    You are not alone in how you're feeling, and you are sure busy, working and coming home to eldery parents. Who could blame you?!

    I have resorted to close family and a few friends that I mostly talk to via email when I am too sick, I also live in a small town that is pretty darn boring, and the things I LIKE to do are not available here. I am pretty isolated because of it.

    I wish I could say something more incouraging.



  3. painandagony

    painandagony New Member

    It gets hard always putting a smile on your face when out and about working or otherwise. Even though you're happy for others successes and happiness, you just want a little once and a while for yourself. Sorry to hear you're living at home, it's just not the order of how things should be.
  4. Juloo

    Juloo Member

    We are different in that I have a husband and child, but yes, I do sometimes feel different.

    I was reminded lately when 2 of the 3 women in the office ran a 15K that they'd been training for for several months. One is young, unmarried and full of energy. The other is newly married and full of energy. Since they're a good 15 years younger than I am, we are just on different planes of existence, even without this CF to screw it up.

    The other woman is a few years older, but very active -- she and her husband hit the gym at least 3 times a week.

    I'm known all of them long enough to know that when they exclaim, "You just don't look *that bad*!" that I can say to them that they only see me when I let them see me, and I have planned my week (and day) so that I can function at work. My husband and son see me both ways.

    I was listening to a conversation between our family therapist and my husband talking about 'sometimes when you go out walking, do you suddenly break into a run because you have extra energy to discharge?' I felt like I was listening to a foreign language. This simply does not compute in any way, shape or form. I just don't have any experience that would let me understand that.