Do you feel isolated from having fibromyalgia?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by kriket, Jun 14, 2008.

  1. kriket

    kriket New Member

    Hey all,

    I have noticed since I have been dx about 7 yrs. ago that my pain is worsening and I keep isolating myself more and more. It seems as if people just irritate me as they just do not understand your pain and discomfort. I dont even feel like getting out of bed most days and just ringe when I have to even got o the store. I had just rahter stay home and away from people. Anyone else this way?

  2. willruthie1965

    willruthie1965 New Member

    I don't know why but I isolate myself.I THInk it is part of the illness. We are all so sensitive to noises,smells and anxiety. Maybe it's a way we try to protect oursleves from the stress of our enviroment. It also doesn't help we feel like crap most of the time. It just seems easier to stay home. Then you have people who can't understand why you can't do anything. I use to love people but now I can't be around people.

    Sometimes I just tell my good friend that I am sorry but I can't talk on the phone tonight. RUthie

    JJMMRJ New Member


    I understand what you mean. Even though I am in college and should be out having fun, I tend to be a homebody. I have close friends that go out a lot, but I never feel in the mood to be super social. I guess I am lucky in the sense that I have my fiance to spend my time with, but he still sometimes has a difficult time understanding what I am dealing with.

    What has worked for me, is that I have accepted the fact that Fibromyalgia is a part of me, and focus on doing what makes me happy. I have had FM for 10 years, and it has only been in the past 3 or 4 years that I have been able to do this. I would recommend finding something that you love to do. For me, I began reading a lot again and I taught myself to knit and crochet. These are things you can do at home to begin uplifting your mood, and they will also get you out and about. Like uou can then go to the bookstore and search for awhile for new books, and then maybe find a favorite spot, like a park, to sit and read in the sun. Little steps like this make a big difference.

    Having Fibromyalgia can definitely be isolating, but just realize that people will never understand, and that you are now a stronger person for having to experience dealing with it.

    The best of luck. I just want you to know that it does get better, and I have personally experienced it. I know what you are going through.
  4. erinwilburn

    erinwilburn New Member

    with everything said so far! I know I try to protect myself from stresses, because I know what happens when I get home. Sometimes the crying and pain just aren't worth it.

    I also have found reading as an escape but, like others I have delt with mental stresses that make it hard to read. I have found that 1st person written books work best for me. Some days I can only read a few pages but it is still something. We have to keep our minds active even if our bodies can't be.

    My friends have learned to be social with me on line! there are some great social networking sites that can help you feel conected. And this board helps all of us know we are never alone!

    I am still working on acsepting FM as a part of daily life but then I have only been dealing with it for 3 years. All in time.

  5. Honora88

    Honora88 Member

    It's hard to feel connected to people when you are experiencing something they aren't
  6. cookie1960

    cookie1960 New Member

  7. pansylady

    pansylady New Member

    I think if we let it like I have done for a while you can feel very isolated. My family & friends just dont understand what FM is & all the symptoms I have like allergies, memory loss, Sweating & Pain that go with it.

    I cant stand crowded places which stress me out so I cant go on holiday very often. Even flying for one hour stresses me out. Crowds at airports.

    I try to avoid people who cause me stress as its stress which really effects people with FM. Also being very sensitive doesnt help either. I have lost friends due to my over sensitivity.

  8. lvjesus

    lvjesus Member

    I agree with what you said about doing things that make you feel happy. I think it is important to find them out and do them. What makes you feel better, comfortable.

    Here is what I mean. Yesterday morning I did not feel well, not real bad, just that unwell feeling like all was definitely not right, you know? So I set out to "comfort" myself. I woke up at 6 am, not because I wanted to be up at 6 am on Saturday, but because I was having some anxiety. So I couldn't sleep, tried the tv but it was too bright and I was not in the mood anyway. So I lay there a little while longer. Then I got my bible and read for a short time. Then I got some cereal and fed the cats.

    Then I got in the shower because a hot shower makes me feel good. After I washed my hair, I was tired, so did not soap, just stood in the warm water. I got out and sat on the bed on the heating pad for awhile and watched some tv. It was very nice.

    I don't like clutter, it makes my mind anxious and unable to rest, so I got up long enough to make the bed and straighten up my room. That made me feel a lot better mentally, even though I physically did not feel like doing anything.

    So I guess what I am saying, is figure out what makes you feel better, like comfort food, find comfort things, like soft pajamas or your heating pad, a pet or a stuffed animal even and then do them for yourself. Pamper yourself. It really helps.

    God Bless
  9. harmony21

    harmony21 New Member

    Yes kriket i sure do, I too feel things have got worse and am so much more anti social

    i too worked with people as a job, in a school, very intense work and then a very intense, dysfunctional famil after work

    I now do my shopping and paying bills in other suburbs so I dont know wo many people and in do it times where there are less, like first thing in the morning, yeah a hassle but worth the quietness, no children especially

    I love isolation now yet i miss my close friends, who dont understand

    angel hugs

  10. coolma

    coolma New Member

    Years of isolation in this darned FM.
    But, as I felt stronger, and the flares were more under control, I got outside. I walked my dog every day.
    I said hello to every neighbour I could.
    I did telephone volunteering, just a few calls a week.
    I networked through my local library.
    After several years, I was able to volunteer for just a 2 hour period once a week, at a local senior's centre.
    Also, crocheted in little time elements, read in little bits, played the organ in 10 and 20 minute intervals, and once a month had someone over for dinner.
    Now, as time passed, I have structured a new life formyself. Still don't like crowds or noise, and I live a peaceful life in the country, and I love it.
    I think it is essential to develop some passions in your life that will carry you through isolation in this condition. Movies, music, books, crocheting or knitting, all in little tiny intervals daily. You can build up your strength. Walking 10 minutes at a time, twice a day. Anything, to give you a life.
    Good luck and hope this helps.
  11. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    Sometimes I feel isolated and mostly irritated.
    I work. I have kids. I take care of the home. I try to live as 'normal' as possible. I find myself 'ticked' off when I have too much to do, when I have to go somewhere, even to dinner sometimes. I'm very sensitive lately, crying when I'm overwhelmed. Went to a family dinner Sat. night. I started hurting, I was tired, irritated, got the big lump in my throat, had to excuse myself and go to the bathroom. I just wanted to go home.
    I yelled (I rarely yell) when I got off the phone w/someone who said they were stopping by on their way home from somewhere. What is wrong with me???!!!
    I'm just mad sometimes. Mad that I have a list of things to do (like we all do) and no energy to complete it, so my list keeps getting longer and longer.
    I don't want to hear anyone ask me anything about Fibro - I don't feel like explaining, answering..

    So yes, I feel isolated. No matter how understanding some people are, unless you're living it, I just don't think you get it.