Does anyone else have the fear of loosing their independence

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by azcactuslil, Apr 4, 2006.

  1. azcactuslil

    azcactuslil New Member

    I am starting another new job and am terrified that I won't be able to perform in the rpfessional detailed way that I always that I have in the past. It is a very good job with an excellant company. What if my mind is so fuzzy I can't keep thinks straight? What if I can't work out ther doctor appointments? What if, oh just what if.....

    Sometimes I feel I am on the edge looking over into a dark chasm that I know I will never find my out of. I am not ready to quit working yet. I want ot continue with my work and do what I have been trained to do and what I am good at.

    Please God... Let me be able to concentrate and learn!
  2. Shelbyeatenton

    Shelbyeatenton New Member

    Firstly azcactuslil you will do just fine at your new job because you will do your best. Not the "pushing yourself" best you can do. But the pacing yourself, taking your time and not getting flustered if things do go fuzzy.

    Do you employers know about your FM/CFS? If they don't it may well be a good idea to let them in. They will be able to help you. If they don't know, they can't help.

    If you feel things getting on top of you and getting confused with how things work, there is a very simple solution..... ask for help. I am certain, someone will help.

    I feel your title more than anything. I am losing my independence. I am unable to work and in a wheelchair. The council still haven't fixed it so there is a chair lift for the three steps outside my house so i can't go anywhere without someone helping me.

    I sometimes need help getting to the bathroom and in and out of the shower and i have always wanted my indepence. Always creved it. Hence getting the flat in the first place.

    I have lost my independence completely and i'm not losing it gratefully, on the inside. I'm angry, frustrated and hurt that i am no longer the person i used to be and that i've been forced into a person i don't want to be.

    Sorry got long.

    Many hugs and good luck in your job,
  3. maggie_d

    maggie_d New Member

    I understand what you mean. It has really been bothering me also, and at work I have more than once wondered how long can I be an efficient worker as in the past. Being active and a pro multi tasker has earned me high praises at work in the past, but I am feeling it slipping away a bit at a time. We can only be the best we can be and take care of ourselves, our health should be our #1 priority, however if we need to work for the money we need to be as kind to ourselves as we would be to someone else.

    Take care and congratulations on your new job.

  4. Crispangel66

    Crispangel66 New Member

    and I have in a few ways, there are many things I could do alone before that my husband won't let me do by myself anymore.

    He just worries I will get hurt, worse than I already am.

    I am going to be getting a wheelchair asap.

    I don't want to give in but I have had this dd for about 12yrs and it has done nothing but make me worse every year.

    Today is going to be a bad one I can already tell.

  5. azcactuslil

    azcactuslil New Member

    Thanks for the encouragement. No, my new employer doesn't know about my Fibro yet and I have decided not to make it public right away, at least until after my probation period is over with.

    I want to be judged on my own merits not against someone's preconceived idea of what they think they know about a disease. I refuse to be Carrie with fibromyalgia. I am Carrie. That is who I am. The fibro isn't going to define who I am, not yet.