Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by budmickl, Mar 31, 2008.

  1. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    I think my daughter is going put her dog down because of this. I can't bear the thought of causing her to do this.
    I am so upset now. I wish I hadn't told her what happened.

    [This Message was Edited on 03/31/2008]
    [This Message was Edited on 03/31/2008]
  2. ckball

    ckball New Member

    Don't let her do it. He was probably not feeling good after he got his shots and Sam was just too playful.

    Good dogs bite sometimes and does not mean they are bad. How old is he and what kind of dog is he, how long has she had him.

    You can change his behavior fairly easily. I am a big Dog Whisperer fan and use his priniciples with my girls and it does work. It is work for us humans but the dogs really play off of our emotions.

    I have seen Ceasar take dogs that were truly violent and turn them around. If this is a one time incident, please dont' do this. And don't show you are afraid if you are. They sense that and will do what you are afraid they are going to do.

    I am sorry this happened to you and hope you heal soon but please don't put the dog down-I will help you any way I can-Carla
  3. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    She has already taken her to the vet's.

    She is 12 yrs old, and has deteriorating hips, that is why she's at my house - no stairs.

    Thank you for your offer but like I said, it's probably too late unless the vet can do something else.

  4. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    Malichi (CUJO) is gone. I can't believe I caused her death. I can't deal with the guilt and pain.

    [This Message was Edited on 03/31/2008]
  5. ckball

    ckball New Member

    You didn't do ANYTHING to cause this, so don't think like that. I didn't realize she was older and had hip problems, so maybe she was just in pain and snapped out of response to the pain.

    IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!! You are a warm, wonderful, kind soul and would would never hurt a animal, you didn't make her bite you, you were trying to help break up a fight, which happens. Esp when one is sick.

    Please be good to yourself and take care of you, let the guilt go, you have to for Sam. Just rest and spend time with Sam. We are here for you-Carla
    [This Message was Edited on 03/31/2008]
  6. hugs4evry1

    hugs4evry1 New Member

    In no way, shape or form did you cause this.

    Part of responsible pet ownership is deciding at what time to help a pet end a painful life.

    Your daughter made her own grown up decision on which time was right for them...Please see it from her point of view for a minute....

    She must be heartbroken that her dog caused you this pain and a trip to the doc. You did need to go, having that much swelling from a dog bite is a good indicator that a doctor visit is necessary.

    If my dog bit my mother, I'd have been horrified and would have felt the need to do something about this.

    I understand where your heart is coming from. You went above and beyond for your precious pets, long past the time I would have waited to have something done.

    It's different for all of us....I don't disagree with her decision, I respect it. Please try to do so without the guilt, it won't help.


  7. sisland

    sisland New Member

    Carla and Nancy are RIGHT!!! You did not cause this to happen! I'm sure the Vet would have tried to talk her out of it,,if it wasn't necessary!,,,,,

    Please do not Blame yourself my Dear!,,,,,,,Hugs!,,,,Sis,,,,p.s.,This will pass too and you will feel better!
  8. 4everkid

    4everkid New Member

    I can imagine the pain and guilt you are feeling from this, but I agree, it wasn't your fault.
    Malachi was obviously in a lot of pain. So much, that your daughter had to bring her to your house to avoid the stairs.

    Then, there she was in another dogs house, still feeling miserable. Sam is all happy, energetic and ready to play, but Malachi is in agony. So she snapped. Whether you got in the middle of it or not, and even if you had not gotten bitten so seriously, it would have happened anyway to someone else eventually, or to Sam.

    I am sure your daughter realized that there was nowhere she could take her dog that it would be comfortable in it's condition, and simply decided it was time to put her out of her misery. She sees her dear mother get horribly bitten. That had to cause her a lot of guilt too. If that bite you took to the hand would have been Sam's neck, or a small child, or a major vein, imagine the damage that could have been done.

    Any pet owner would have jumped in without thinking, to save our pet from attack by another larger animal. Its a reflex to save our loved ones. I know if it had been me, I would have had a lot worse names to call it than "Cujo." So don't feel guilty about that either. Its just human nature.

    Your bite may have been the event that triggered your daughter to realize that her dog was in so much pain that it was a danger to others. But you are not the cause of the dog's need to be euthanized. You were simply the first and last victim. It was probably very hard for her, but she did the right thing. It was no longer possible to keep Malachi comfortable.

    I am sorry you have to go through this guilt on top of the injury from the bite. I am sorry for your daughter, who had to make the agonizing decision to put Malachi out of her misery. But in the end, it was the right choice, and really the only choice. But it was not your doing.

    Maybe after your daughter has had time to mourn, you can be the one to provide her with a new companion to fill the void left behind and bring a smile back to her face.

  9. fibromickster

    fibromickster New Member

    Please don't feel bad, I have to tell you if my dog ever did that, I would not hesitate to put him down. Especially with kids around. There is no reason to have a biting dog. My dog and I was viciously attacked when we were walking last summer. The lady even had him on a leash when he tore off from her and attacked both of us. Plus if his health is deteriorating, your daughter probably doesn't want him to be in anymore pain either.

    I will say some prayers for you. I am so sorry
  10. monica33flowers

    monica33flowers New Member

    Please do not blame yourself. The vet would not have allowed your daughter to put the dog down if their was not a good reason.

    Please do not blame yourself. Malachai was in a lot of pain and your daughter had to make a decision. I'm so sorry for the outcome of that decision but just think if any small children would have come in contact with the dog. No one wants a beloved pet to hurt a loved one and when it does happen something is dreadfully wrong with the animal and they are suffering.

    Lots of hugs,
  11. LenoreR

    LenoreR New Member

    We haven't officially *met* yet, but I'm Lenore. I was following your thread but kinda lurked because I haven't quite figured out how to introduce myself on different threads. So, I'm jumping in and doing it.

    You have been through so much in such a short period of time. I have to agree with everyone who told you that this sad ending is absolutely not your fault.

    Guilt is a very easy thing to come into our minds and a very difficult one to get out. Sweetie, no one can tell you how to feel, they are your feelings after all. However, so many of your friends here have given you examples of how this might have been different, how someone else could have gotten hurt, how agonized poor Malachi was from pain, and your dughter's possible perspective. When you can, process their comments and think about them. Hopefully you will come to some of the same conclusions, and then the guilt will lift. I loved the suggestion of when the time was right to gift your daughter with a new companion. That's not making up for guilt; that's a loving gesture from mother to daughter.

    Grieve with your daughter if it helps, alone if it helps, or on paper (or computer keyboard) if it helps. It looks like you have a great support system here to help you too; and I'd be honored to be part of that. When you process all this and grieve, I'll bet the guilt will go away as you realize you really had nothing to do with your daughter's decision. It really wasn't your *fault* that this happened; give yourself a little time to come to realize it yourself. But, don't be surprised if we remind you of that! :)

    I wish you quick healing; physically and emotionally. Take care of that hand, and of the rest of you too. I'm sorry we *met* under these unfortunate circumstances and I am so sorry for your loss; but, I hope to chat in the future about much brighter, happier things!

    All my best,
  12. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    Daughter doesn't feel ill toward me at all. She said it should have been done a year ago.

    The vet told me once that Mick wasn't bad enough to put down, that he still had some life left. When I took him in last month to put him down, the vet readily agreed to do it. So I know he did the same thing with daughter and Malichi. We go to the same vet.

    I know in my head it's not my fault. I know in my heart Malichi is not in pain, and is with Mick and Bud and Tiny. She is happy now, I know.

    Thank you all for being my friends.

    [This Message was Edited on 03/31/2008]