don`t feel like talking,

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Sandyz, Sep 19, 2005.

  1. Sandyz

    Sandyz New Member

    Do you find yourself not wanting to talk when you are in a social situation? I have gotten to be such an introvert, I hate it. Like today for instance, I went to my sons football game. Most of the other parents were chatting away and I didn`t really talk to anyone. I just feel so isolated and my selfworth is in the toilet after being sick so long.

    I just seem to have nothing to say. Sometimes my brain is so foggy, I can`t string a sentence together. I can`t talk about my illness. They wouldn`t understand and don`t want to listen to me complain. But I am tired of pretending that everything is ok when it is not. I don`t do anything but lay around my house and be sick. It just makes me feel so all alone.

    I`m so glad I have my husband and kids and you guys or I don`t know what I would do.
  2. pgfnch2

    pgfnch2 New Member

    but it is mostly with the telephone! I used to love to talk on the phone for hours. And now when the phone rings, I look at the caller ID, and no matter who it is depending on my mood or how my day has gone, I'll just look at it! Sometimes it's my brothers, or someone I dearly love, and I'll just...look at it! My kids are amazed by this, but sometimes I don't care if it's Robert Redford or Brad Pitt! I don't want to talk ~ to anybody:))
    Sweet dreams:)))
  3. rigby

    rigby New Member

    My family is use to me not answering if I don't feel good. I do have to call someone by the end of the day or they will come over to check on me. I was so glad when my kids got out of school. There are days I can just talk away and other I can't think of anything. My son understands he will call and say just thinking of you and that is about it.
  4. Sue50

    Sue50 New Member

    because it makes me have more pain and makes me more tired,I know a lot of times I can't get the words right which is very stressful
    Sue
  5. nanswajo

    nanswajo New Member

    Me too. Takes too much energy.
  6. Rosiebud

    Rosiebud New Member

    I dont have much of a conversation for anyone as my life is so isolated and wrapped up in this illness. How can you escape an illness that is with you every minute of the day and dictates how each day will be.

    Also I get so tired if I am in a situation where there is more than one or two people, the conversation just exhausts me.

    This is a very isolating illness and I'm glad you have your family to support you and us of course.

    love
    Rosie
  7. CanBrit

    CanBrit Member

    I\ve always tended to be a bit of a recluse but since getting FM, I'm even worse. I get my hubby to answer the phone most of the time or I just let it go to the answering machine.

    I find by the end of the day, I'm so tired I just don't feel like idle chatter.

    Maybe they should add hermit-like tendencies to our multiple symptoms list!!

    Have a good one!

    Eileen.

  8. jana15

    jana15 New Member

    Thankyou Sandy.

    I just read your post and burts out laughing. My 21 yo daughter is back living at home at the moment and about an hour ago I had words with her about me having to constantly get up to answer the phone (so many calls and all for her). I reminded her that there are 4 telephones in this house and 3 adults! I don't want to speak on the phone - not even to answer it for her. It seems the family just think if they let it ring long enough I'll get it. Of course I eventually do just to stop the darn noise. This usually means me getting out of bed to go and get it and then having to go find HER to let her know it is for her. Of course she heard it but she thought I'd pick it up.

    God I hate the telephone and have announced to all in sundry tonight that from now on, not only will I not answer it if I am in bed, but I'm taking it off the hook so the constant ringing doesn't drive me nuts!

    I hate the phone, yet I was feeling a tad remorseful about my earlier outburst until I read your post. Now I think I'll suggest we have it disconnected and get a couple of pigeons for sending and messages :)

    Cheer Jana
  9. rileyearl

    rileyearl New Member

    I know exactly what you mean--especially about the crowd that gets together around the kids' activities. My son is only 4 and goes to a coop preschool. My husband does all the work with the coop and takes Ian to preschool. I'm completely out of the loop. When it's time to attend some fund raiser or other "mandatory" event. I'm off sitting by myself.

    This ailment is so isolating. I do not have the energy to spend on small talk with almost strangers.

    Jana, unplug the phone for a few days. They'll get the message!

    Take care!

    Francie
  10. JPach007

    JPach007 New Member

    I know what you are feeling...all of you! The people I work with think I am a snob because I dont talk with them, or have drinks with them after work. They are all younger than I am, and I dont think they would understand my/our illness.
    Hugs,
    Jessica
  11. Mareeok

    Mareeok New Member

    ...to get into conversations sometimes because I feel I have to explain from the beginning what is wrong with me and it's too long and too depressing. How many times can you say,"Nothing has changed, I still have pain."
  12. Juloo

    Juloo Member

    Unfortunately, I know a lot of people that think if I'm not talking, it's THEIR cue to talk...and talk...and talk. It just wears me out, especially on the telephone.

    One of the other reasons I withdraw is because when the hypersensitivity kicks in -- especially if I'm up late or am very tired -- I can't distinguish what people say through the background noise. I just stop trying to listen.
  13. nina2

    nina2 New Member

    I had no idea so many here felt this way too.

    All of your descriptions fit me to the tee.
    I am so isolated these days I may as well live in Siberia .

    I too cannot tolerate talking on the phone which at one time was a wonderful connection to friends and family. I loved kicking off my shoes, getting comfy and chatting for hours.

    I feel as though I have become an empty shell, just making it through the day, dragging all the way.

    It seems as though the spirit dies along with this DD.

    No one but all of you here can even come close to understanding this and I thank God everyday for finding this site and having an extended family here.

    I love you all!
    nina
  14. pumpkinpatch

    pumpkinpatch New Member

    I noticed in your previous post that you are being treated for various infections and viruses. Are you still on the meds for those? They could be making you feel worse.

    Cindy
  15. Sandyz

    Sandyz New Member

    I could indentify with all your posts so much. Yes, I still am being treated for the viruses and infections. It is helping, I have more energy and feel way better then I did. I wouldn`t have been able to go to my kids activities before. But I have been through so much the last 15 plus years with this, I do feel like an empty shell. I`m plain worn out.

    I also don`t like talking on the phone especially in the evening when I am tired. I do better in the morning with that.
  16. pumpkinpatch

    pumpkinpatch New Member

    I know exactly how you feel. We have 3 sons and a cockatiel so we have a busy lifestyle and let me tell you I've got to put on a brave face and don't like to complain too much to them.

    The oldest who lives in the States gets so upset when he hears about my health. I don't want him thinking about me all the time.

    I'm usually a very friendly, outgoing person but with the pain, dizziness and dysfunction it's overwhelming and some days I look and feel totally drained.

    In the meantime I'm continuing with the FFC with meds etc and get more results this week.

    Just to let you know you're not alone.

    Cindy



  17. jyl

    jyl Member

    I usually have the ringers on my phones turned off because I don't like to hear them ring and I don't want to talk. Most people know this so they leave a message on the answering machine and if I feel like it I'll pick up the phone. My mom was completely surprised when I actually answered the phone yesterday!

    jyl
  18. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    I, too, would rather stay at home; it just takes too much energy to get ready, go, sit somewhere uncomfortable or be with a bunch of people, hurting and feeling like running!

    It is easier to stay home...do my thing, alone. Be with my husband, do whatever, see my kids occasionally, visit parents, plan. But, at home where it is quiet, comfortable and I can control the situation.

    Think that's the big thing...control of surroundings and comditions. No surprises.

    My head tell me to "get a life," but I have one, just a quiet, solitary one. Suites me just fine.

    Sue