Don't Know How to Pray for Myself......I Feel Selfish

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by futurehope, Mar 18, 2006.

  1. futurehope

    futurehope New Member

    Hi,

    I have been coming to this board for the past few weeks and have been reading a lot of posts, some even made me cry.

    I grew up going to church, but during my teenage years I swayed. I have had a lot of losses and heartaches the past 13 yeras and have been upset with GOD alot in my life because of all of my problems.

    I feel I have rejected GOD before because I remember being in church and actually an overwhelming feeling would come over me while everyone was praying and I would fight it off.

    I know I need to be closer to GOD, I can feel it in my heart.

    I have also broken a few of the ten commandments, I think that means that the door to heaven is closed for me. I have a few skeletons in my closet also and feel much guilt for what I have done and cannot get rid of it. Am I right about heavens doors being closed for me?

    I do not know how to pray for myself.

    I think that I am not worthy of his help. I also feel very selfish when I think about praying for myself.

    I have felt a little closer to GOD lately because of all of the heartaches I have been going thru (my own personal heartaches) with my illnesses. Is it really right to become closer to GOD because I am sick and want to make sure I make it in heaven's door.

    I hope that this all makes sense to someone and they can help.

    Thank you,
    Love and prayers to everyone,
    Brenda
  2. sixtyslady

    sixtyslady Member

    i just want to say that God loves you and you don"t have to wait until you feel your good enough, to reach out to God he will meet you right where your at.he knows whats in your heart.just recieve Jesus into your heart right now and he will be there for you. he promises he"ll never leave us.God Bless You. Sixtyslady
  3. justlooking

    justlooking New Member

    The fact that you posted and asked, means he's already reaching out to you.

    He works in ways we don't understand. I felt much like you do now several years ago. I had gone very astray but secretly wished for a relationship with God. In my heart I knew what I wanted, I opened up my heart and the doors started opening too. Very strange how it all worked.

    So my point is your heart is open, HE is there, accept the Lord by saying a prayer that you accept, and go from there.

    God Bless
  4. Pianowoman

    Pianowoman New Member

    You are already forgiven for past mistakes. God is reaching out to you now. Just talk to him like you would talk to anone else. He hears all of us and answers in his own way. We are all worthy of his love.

    Just wanting to be near to Him is enough. Try to have some quiet time with him every day. You will feel him reaching out to comfort you.

    Kathy.
  5. BLUEROSE7

    BLUEROSE7 New Member

    God will never leave you nor forsake you. For who so ever shall call upon the lord shall be saved!

    God LOVES you Brenda...

    He is knocking at your door(heart), just open your heart and let him in.

    As someone else posted, once you let him in hun your past is already forgiven. Your slate is clean.

    Never feel guilty for asking for prayers for yourself....God wants to hear from you....talk with him as if you were talking with anyone else.

    God Bless
    Love,
    ~Bluerose~
  6. lovethesun

    lovethesun New Member

    Jesus died on the cross for forgivness of our sins.In his name you are already forgivin.He just needs you to realise this.Linda
  7. Landy

    Landy New Member

    Dear futurehope, your heart is what God looks upon and
    the feeling inside is the Holy Spirit tugging at your heart.
    We have all broken at least one of the Ten Commandments.
    They were written to show us that we are all sinners and Jesus
    died on the cross for all. All we need to do is say the
    sinners prayer and ask Him in. It is our struggles in life
    that bring us to a closer walk with Him. Knock and the
    door shall be open, seek and ye shall find, ask and it shall
    be given. There is hope my dear and my prayers are with you.
  8. futurehope

    futurehope New Member

    All of your messages were very moving and made me feel better.

    I am on my journey to try to be closer to God now.

    The bible is so hard to understand, does anyone else have this problem? Some parts of the bible actually scare me too and some of the preachers on TV scare me also. There is one guy, he is heavy set, and I cannot think of his name. I remember watching him several years ago and some of the comments he made disturbed me. The few that I remember were "GOD likes to punish us" and "Women were put on earth only to please their husbands" and he went on talking about how women would say that had a headache when they would not want to (you know) and he said that was not acceptable. Maybe his name was John Hagee or something like that.

    My mother was a TRUE Christian and a very good woman. I wish she was still here to talk to me about all of this. When she had cancer and was dying, she was NEVER afraid. She actually told me "I am not afraid of dying, because I know where I am going". Incredible faith, not to mention the most loving woman I ever knew in my life.

    Thank you so much again for the wonderful replies. I understand so much more than I did before.

    Love and prayers,
    Brenda
  9. Lolalee

    Lolalee New Member

    Just ask God to forgive you, in the name of Jesus, and He will. Confess your sins to Him..all of them. There is not a single sin that He has not heard. The reason Jesus came to this earth and died was for us...so that we would be forgiven. He took our sin upon Him. And it is ok to be angry at God and tell Him so as long as you can move on and not stay angry forever.

    It sounds like God is calling you. Don't be ashamed. God thinks you are worthy...He sent His son to die for you.

    I think that sometimes God allows us to have struggles in our lives so that we will call upon Him. I am closer to Him now than I was before I got sick. I just asked Jesus to come into my heart and accepted Him as my Savior and that was the beginning of our relationship.

    futurehope, don't condemn yourself. Ask God to help you to learn how to pray for yourself and to remove from you any feelings of unworthiness or condemnation.

    I was raised in the Catholic Church and left the church and spent many years wandering and lost. I did things that were displeasing to God. But I have confessed my sins and I try to do that on a daily basis, because I'm human and not perfect. I know He never left me even though I left Him for a time. He was waiting for me, just as He is waiting for you. God is so good.

    Blessings,
    Lolalee
  10. Landy

    Landy New Member

    Your mother was a wonderful strong Christian. The Bible
    can be hard to understand but can get easier over time
    and with prayer the Holy Spirit will open it up to you.
    I love studying scripture and have many great books
    by writers and those who have studied it and make it easier
    for us. Your faith and love for the Lord dance across
    the page. If I can help I'm here, please ask. I know the
    preacher that you spoke of. Many come in the name of the
    Lord and many come deceiving. It's good to be able to discern the difference. You are in my prayers. God Bless you.
    Landy