Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by jewels920, Nov 21, 2007.

  1. jewels920

    jewels920 New Member

    I'd like to know more about you, if you're game.

    I spend the biggest part of my three nights off recovering from my four nights of ten hour shifts, but I do like to read and I sometimes make jewelry--nothing fancy, but...nice. I am an avid student of Tibetan Buddhism and a Reiki practitioner. I also do tarot readings.

    I watch a lot of TV and it might be melting my brain. All those dating reality shows I used to make fun of? Can't take my eyes off them. Pretty sure I'm losing IQ points every time I watch "I Love New York". Luckily, I have a few to spare. Not many, but a few.

    Love and hugs.

  2. Doober

    Doober New Member

    my profile, I am as it says married for 14 years with 2 children, 9 and 13.

    When we got married we decided to have our children young so that we can be as young as we can in all aspects of their lives. We have the 2 dogs (both Australian shepards), hyper little things at times but it is their other qualities that we love in them.

    I have been working for the same company for the past 18 years. Started in the mailroom out of high school until I decided what field of work I wanted to get into which is the telecommunications field.

    I work in a major bank which I am sure you see their ATM's all over the place. My particular job is in support of the most demanding part of a banking/money management division. I support people who work and deal with the Stock market so things need to be done like yesterday. I do have a staff of 2 people who report to me so they have been very supportive of me and our work.

    I am a pretty outgoing person who tries to find the positive in people. I walk away from negativity when possible. I usually say the first thing that comes to mind and belive me, my tongue hurts alot from having to bite it. Friends and family who know me, know that when they ask me a direct question, they are going to get a direct answer. They have learned not to ask me anything that they may not like my answer.

    I am 1 of 6 children, youngest of the 4 boys with 1 sister who is younger than I.

    I have a hearing disability which left me more than 80% deaf in one ear and roughly 60% in the other since I was a child. So from that alone I have lived with many obsacles and adversaries through out my life, but I have never let it get in my way.

    Grew up with a drunk father who had no prblems with using his belt when he got mad. Had a mother that was not the most cleaniness person in the world and this caused many issues while groing up in school.My folks have used me as a reason to collect SSDI on my behalf until I was 18 and spent all of it instead using it plan for my future with a "disability".

    As a child I have gotten in many of troubles, I have done things that could have killed me but I manage to survive. I stepped on a nail when I was about 7, never told anyone and my leg got infected so bad to the point that I could not walk and it was not until my mother saw me crawling to get around that something was done about it. I spent over 2 weeks in the hospital because of this.

    several years later while my brother and I was playing with jig-saw blades we were throwing them around and one of them ended up in the side of my leg to the bone. I fell off a chain link fence and landed straight on my back, I thought I was going to dies that days as it took forever to get my breath. years later I fell straight on my back again after falling from a small cliff about 8 feet tall that wrapped around a hiking trail in New Hampshire.

    Along with these injuries I had several others that never resulted in any broken bones. several cases of illnesses that left me laying in bed with high fevers and I have let them run their course, so that may be a reason for my body acting the way it does several years later. I did totally tear my ACL and never repaired it until 18 years later.

    As with my brothers and sisters it was "every man for himself" when it came time to move out. As a teen I hung with what many would call the "wrong crowd" did my drinking and smoking. While I may not be proud of these moments, I am not ashamed of them either because without life's experiences we never learn anything that will help guide our way in the future.

    As a parent I teach my kids that they are not better than anyone else and that noone else is better than them. I certainly raise my children a whole lot different than my folks have. I have never raise my hands to them as I cannot stand to see the tears and fears in a childs eyes.

    These days I go to work in the Financial district of Boston. When I get home I usually eat dinner and head to my room to relax and watch TV because the work day has drained me out. As far as TV, I do like some documentaries and of course football on TV as well as watching poker tournaments. I play on-line poker (Not for real money though), I save trhe real money games when I play friends.

    Well, I have to run for now and I hope this is not too much to absorb? If I think of anything more and believe me with the life I have lived there is much more that I have not written, I will add later on.

    Thank you for your time and and interest.

    To anyone else who reads this, feel free to ask any questions. Many of what is written here has not been discussed openly with anyone else, but I do feel very comfortable with everyone here to share.

  3. jewels920

    jewels920 New Member

    for sharing. I, too, grew up with alcoholic parents. My father passed in 1990 after many years battling heart disease. My mother is still alive, though in poor health. She has vascular disease, FM and arthritis, among other things.

    My childhood was more about psychological terror. I was only spanked once, that I remember, but never actually HIT. But the threat was always there. My father used to say things like, "Stop that or I'll break your little arm!" He threatened to kill my pet dog once. When I started to cry, I was ridiculed for believing he would do something like that. I had no reason to think he wouldn't. Dad called it 'psychology' but it was terrorism.

    I have two half brothers, both older than me. We have our father in common. But my mother raised them from a early age and they call her mom. I'm only in touch with one of my brothers...the other was an alcoholic/drug addict and did nothing but cause horrible disruption and pain when he was around. And he never owned responsibility for anything. I hope he has found some peace in his life, wherever he is.

    I went to college, managed to graduate. All while living at home in this oppressive environment.

    I've been through many destructive relationships in the past, trying to figure everything out. Counseling helped but I feel the real help came when I decided in my 20s that I wasn't going to be part of this cycle and started reading all the self-help books, psychology books, philosophy books, etc. I could get my hands on. I'm still an avid reader.

    Though I can trace some FM symptoms back to age 15 when I had mono, the more severe symptoms didn't present until in my late 30s. I find a lot of relief through meditation, chi kung, and yoga. I take medication as well. Hoping to keep the meds at a minimum through other techniques as medication is not getting easier to afford.

    Really disappointed in the FM board of late. I came to depend on the posts there to help carry me through my work week but the nastiness is getting intense. That and pseudointellectual BS. Thought I'd come over here and try to relax a bit.

    Thanks again for sharing so much about yourself.

    Love and hugs.


  4. Doober

    Doober New Member

    both have been through trying moments in our lives. Like you I have decided that if my future was going to be determined, it was going to be determined through my hard work.

    If I had listened to all the people in my life, i most likely would be still be working in a supermarket at the job I had when I was 16 and still living at home. But I made decisions to work hard and it has paid off for me.

    You going to college and working hard is a great acheivement in the environment you had to endure. In your bio it says you are a law enforcement dispatcher, this is no small task or easy job by any means. You must hear many things that would make even me cringe. You have a huge responsibilty at your job and I sense that this job is highly stressful and trying at times.

    While we live in a crazy world and bad things happen to good people, bad people get away with things. There are many times when good things happen to good people and the bad people do get caught and punished. I try to separate the negatives and focus on the positives.

    There are many things in this life I am not going to like or think is not fair, I just have to accept the fact they happen and are there.

    Much like the negativism that has been going on here at the board, I just ignore them pretty much. I will read them and move on.

    There is always going to be someone who feels the need to continually debate something and say the same thing several times with different words just to keep the post bumping to the top of the list. I am not going to be bashing anyone or call them out. If there is something to say I will.

    Many people want to act like teachers while forgetting that we never stop being students of life.

    There is no need for anyone to feel uncomfortable or feel the need to leave because of the words of someone else. I have a "whatever" attitude. Someone says something I don't like, I just say "whatever" and move one. The fewer words said sometimes is better to make the other person think. Sooner or later they will realize that they are beating their own dead horse long after it becomes a skeleton.
  5. jewels920

    jewels920 New Member

    Oops--started to type "Doobie" instead of "Doober"! That's quite a difference!

    Yes, we certainly have had our trying times. I feel to this day it matured me and made me more compassionate and tolerant of others.

    My difficult times have also given me drive to investigate the causes of human suffering and how to relieve it. Can't say I have any earth shaking answers yet, but I've managed to educate myself with a lot of different philosophies and schools of thought.

    I wouldn't go through it again. I also wouldn't change it for the world. :)

    With much love.