Not exactly sure how to explain this, but was wondering if anyone can relate to this. I spend way too much time worrying about what my future holds with this DD. I just turned 65, have a great second husband (been married 5 years). He is eleven years older than I and I worry every day that he will...how can I say this gently....die before I do and I will be left alone, not able to take care of myself because of this stupid, frustrating, painful, tiresome disease which I have had for almost 4 years. Prior to my second marriage I was single for 16 years, worked every day, supported myself and with the exception of an anxiety disorder, was happy with myself as a person and enjoyed my life. Now all this has changed. I'm just not the same person I was four years ago....mentally or physically. One of my worst symptoms is that I am just plain scared all of the time. And although I take care of myself day to day I have this unshakeable fear that I would not be able to do it alone...that I just wouldn't get out of bed and face the day alone. Sorry for being so depressing, but I guess I just needed to get that off my chest. Thanks for reading.