Feel like a bad person - but I'm envious!!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by bluegnu, Oct 19, 2009.

  1. bluegnu

    bluegnu New Member

    I have to say - October, although my favorite month in Colorado, always makes me feel a bit sad and downright envious. There is SO much support for Breast Cancer Awareness - and THANK GOD! What an amazing thing that we're helping to close the door on this disease.

    But, at the same time - when I see pink ribbons everywhere I go, and asked to donate everywhere I go (I donate $100 every October), see commercials every ten minutes, read it in every paper and magazine, see businesses supporting it - it's literally everywhere. How wonderful it must make these people with this horrible disease feel to have such an outpouring of support.

    And then there are those of us with CFS. My family doesn't believe it, my work doesn't know it, dozens of doctors have turned me away not knowing what to do with me, the press/media think it doesn't exist - and I feel so lonely and isloated. I wish there was some kind of support for us.

    I'm sorry if I sound like a terrible person.
  2. Elisa

    Elisa Member


    You are not a terrible person at all...you are amazing - you support charities. But you and all of us are human - and I think how you feel is very common. I feel that way - to desire support personally and for this terrible illness is totally normal.

    It has been a long a horrible isolating road - for many of us, there is no support anywhere - family, friends, doctors etc.

    To be ill is horrible and then to suffer the insults of others - to marginalize and belittle the illness - its unspeakably cruel. But this will change - it is right now.

    I feel God has heard our prayers and things are beginning to happen - maybe even He can't stand the cruelty a minute longer.

    I hope we have a ribbon to support our illness someday and I hope it is soon!

    God Bless,

    [This Message was Edited on 10/19/2009]
  3. Svette_Palme

    Svette_Palme New Member

    Besides these pains and fatigue, the denails are our cross to bear. It is awfull enough without that.

    I find it worst when a family member calls on me to help and I have to refuse because it will just be too agonizing. That just happened this month!

    But we have to take care of ourselves first because otherwise we will be of no use to anyone, and a burden too. So give yourself your due and shake off the guilt; guilt is very destructive and anxiety increases the pains.
  4. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    If you are an awful person, than so am I, bc I have had exactly the same thoughts. I do feel a lot of compassion towards those with breast cancer - towards those with any serious illness, actually, but I also feel like it's totally unfair that they get all the attention, the support and understanding, and the money for research and we have for so long seemed to get nothing (or worse, accusations that we are faking it, etc)......hopefully, the discovery of XMRV will help to change that

    please understand that I am not begrudging them the research dollars or support - just that I so wish we would have had it, too
  5. JLH

    JLH New Member

    No, you don't sound like a terrible person. You are just stating how you feel and you have that right.

    It gets depressing to feel badly all of the time. Pain and fatigue is no fun.

    My younger brother has stage 4 colon cancer and is suffering terribly. I feel like a terrible person when I can not visit him at times when he is in the hospital. But, due to other health problems, I am combined to a wheelchair. It's hard to get people to take you places when you are in a wheelchair--it's a real "pain" for them.

    I, too, really feel like a rotten person sometimes because I can't help him. But I know I am not. I'm just sick, too, just in another way. My brother understands, thankfully.
  6. quanked

    quanked Member

    HOnest person. I like honest. I do not know why many of us think that we are "bad" people just for daring to notice dispairties, injustice, and inequities and dare be so audacious as to comment on what we see.

    I applaud you for daring to speak up about what many others are thinking.
  7. sportsmom628

    sportsmom628 New Member


    I agree with the other post nothing wrong with being honest, I like that. And you are not a bad person for feeling the way you do, I feel the same way with other causes also, but just how it took so long for the FM commercials and awareness hopefully soon something similiar will be in the near future for CFS.
    But within hidden syndromes (lol) syndrome my butt I consider it a disease myself both FM and CFS but just my thought, anyways since you cant very much see it, it is hard for people to understand but some people are very ignorant! I was fired due to my disabilities because my boss could not point me out as an individual that had other things going on, there were 4 other fellow employees with just FM and they did not miss work as much as me. (sorry to get off topic, but just makes me so angry). But I truly understand what you mean.