Feeling judged when telling another Dr. about all your pain meds

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by shelby319, Jan 23, 2007.

  1. shelby319

    shelby319 New Member

    I had to go to my dentist yesterday to discuss my upcoming surgery on my gums and perhaps a tooth implant, so of course he had to update my medical files and what meds I'm on.

    So, I told him all of the medications, including my vitamins list, which is important to tell them that you are taking such and such for vitamims also, so there aren't any interactions between them.

    But of course when it came to what I take for pain meds, his mouth dropped and made a statement of, "how on earth do you manage being on morphine on a daily basis without being all drugged up and still function"!! "And why would you need the morphine for just fibromyalgia as that pain can't be that bad or he's never heard of people needing morphine for that type of a disease"!!

    I was so shocked along with feeling like a drug addict and he made me feel quilty for being on these meds, I didn't know what to say!! My mouth dropped as he was telling me, "well, I guess no wonder your not in any pain from the abcessed tooth because your so drugged up, so I guess theres no need to give you anything else"!

    He kept using the word "drugged up"!! I'm not drugged up, I'm living a normal life without pain, but I didn't say that!! I was too shocked to say anything, so should I have said something or just not tell any other Dr. I see that I'm on these meds? I don't need to be judged everytime I go to another Dr. any longer, as we have to deal with enough problems with Dr's as it is now!!!!

    Aren't we suppose to tell each new or all the Dr's we see, that we are on pain medication and what it is we are taking? I'm just so tired of Dr's passing judgement on me after my last experience with the pain management Dr. Who was a jerk by the way!!!

    Just another day in the life of living on pain medications!! YUCKIE!!

    Thank you to all, and I hope everyone is having a some what sparkling day without too much pain~~~
    Gentle hugs,
    Shelby
  2. apmimaje

    apmimaje New Member

    Dear Shelby,

    I've come to this board marny times and always felt better just reading the boards. I know how you feel and I feel awful for you. I went through a similar experience a few years ago when I went for a sleeping test. The Doctor entered the room and after reading my pain meds he asked, in a nasty manner, who my Dr.was. I DID NOT TELL HIM. After testing he said I had continuous alpha waves all night. This of course in his experience had only been seen in drug addicts----Not exact words. In tears I finally said to him that mow a days there are other thoughts on treating pain with real pain medicine. He referred me to a Psychiatrist. I could get my first appointment in three months. NEVER SAW HIM AGAIN and did not tell him the name of my great Doctor who is certified in treating pain.
  3. butterfly83

    butterfly83 New Member

    I've had many different people judge me for the pain meds I'm on, but my simple answer is that 'Obviously since I am fully conscious and speaking to you, I am not over-medicated, and my pain must be severe for that to be the case. I work very closely with my doctor and other medical professionals to manage my illness as best I can, and that combines includes using pain medications along with other therapies, so I can function. If you are uncomfortable working with me because of my Fibromyalgia, or because of the medications I am on, you can let me know so I can seek the care of another dentist.'

    I must say, that this isn't the case with all dentists. I recently got my wisdom teeth removed, and although my oral surgeon was initially surprised at the medications I had to take to manage my pain, I explained to her as best I could, the nature of Fibromyalgia, how painful it is, and my own concerns about how the stress of the procedure would effect me. During the surgery, she was prepared to give me more anesthesia because of the amounts of meds I am used to, and she was very careful to do the procedure as delicately as possible, to minimize my complications and pain afterwards. So there ARE good professionals out there, who won't make these kinds of comments to you, but will simply work with you and help you through whatever procedures you need.

    I really do understand feeling the judgement though, and it's really crushing. We're so tired and in so much pain already, it's so difficult to have to feel like you have to defend your efforts to try to simply FUNCTION. It's really a horrible feeling, so I'm very sorry your dentist made you feel that way.

  4. gidgetsmom

    gidgetsmom New Member

    If I could even "manage" to speak to this person, I would use the exact words of butterfly83 in that first paragraph!!

    Thankfully, I have a very up-to-date dentist who uses anything within his power to make things easier on me when I go.

    He knows I have FM and the medications I take and NOT ONCE has he EVER tried to pass judgment.

    I would never set foot in a doctor or dentists' office again if they ever spoke to me the way you were spoken to!!

    I'm sorry you had to go thru that!
    Shelley

  5. butterfly83

    butterfly83 New Member

    Oh yeah Shelby, Gidget's comment reminded me..

    Even though that is what you SHOULD say when someone is ignorant like that, if I were you, I would call the office, request my medical files be sent to me and cancel my future appointments, get a recommendation from a friend or even from one of your regular doctors who might know of a good dentist, and then send the former dentist a nice letter, saying something along the lines of what I said, and let him know that you won't be giving him further business, because his responses to your medical illness did not inspire confidence in you as to his abilities to treat you.

    I wouldn't give him the business. The way he reacted, and made you feel, would NOT make me want to give him money for services.