Feeling very unsure of my future

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Ouch4017, Feb 22, 2007.

  1. Ouch4017

    Ouch4017 New Member

    Well, I've had FM for about a year now. I've seen uncountable doctors, rheumatologist, taken a bunch of different meds, etc. I think my family is finally trying to understand and my husband is being extremely supportive and trying to learn with me.

    I went to see a new doctor Monday that I really like and he is trying a new approach. Apparently my FM is a pretty severe case and very few doctors seem to be comfortable treating it. Anyway, He is slowly weaning me off of neurontin and putting me on Lyrica. He has taken me off Tramadol for pain and feels Percoset is more appropriate for now. I am taking clonazopam in the AM and PM with is fine and I actually slept last night!(I also have Anxiety issues) and in my next visit in two weeks he is going to start me on cymbalta. I'm also signed up for physical therapy for FM at the clinic. I'm pretty excited about the new approach and trying to keep very optomistic towards everyone around me. Honestly, I am scared to death. I'm down to working 4 hours a day, which seems to have a huge relief on my stress issues, but I'm afraid if I try to go back full time, it's going to be REAL bad again.

    I guess I'm trying to take one day at a time, but does it EVER get better??? Sometimes I just feel like crawling in a corner and dying. I feel like a burdon on my family, husband and co workers. I need some advice or maybe something that will make me feel better?????
  2. Ouch4017

    Ouch4017 New Member

    Thank you. It does help. I just don't know if I'm ready for disability yet. I'm just not ready to give up but on the other hand, it's so hard sometimes. I'm sure you know what I mean. I guess for now I'll give my new medicine some time and again, try and take it one day at a time. YOu are very right when you say it's been a very difficult year. FM is a very difficult and confusing "syndrome" disease not only for me but for my family. It's so hard getting them to understand what it's really like. I've come to the conclusion that the only ones that really understand are people like us and that's why I'm here and SO glad I found this "support group".
  3. aracari

    aracari New Member

    Hello "ouch",
    Skeesix is right: the first year is the hardest. Not only do you have to learn to cope with your new life as it is, but you go through a grieving process for your old life - the energy you have lost and the expectations you have had to set aside. I think it is important - and helpful - to recognize this AS grief. Understanding the processes and stages of grief, (and knowing that it does not continue forever) can help one find some much-needed objectivity and enable one to cope better. It can help family members & friends know how to better identify with what you are feeling (we are all familiar with grief). It also removes some of the self-inflicted pain that many of us struggle with (like telling ourselves "If I were a stronger person, I could handle this better..." or some such!). The circumstances of chronic illness are a burden, but YOU are not. You are not a burden to the people who love you, any more than they would be a burden to you if the situation were reversed.

    Do also consider the disability. It is a trying process in itself but in the end can free you to better handle the day-to-day circumstances of your life and relationships.

    All the best...
  4. padre

    padre New Member

    You can count yourself fortunate. Oh, not that you have FMS, but because you obviously have great support. Your doctor sounds like he/she really cares and understands. A family that is on your side is a big help.

    I agree with the folks above. The grieving and sorting things out is maybe the hardest part.

    Together, you and your support team (including this Board) will help you make progress.
  5. Ouch4017

    Ouch4017 New Member

    Just reading your responses brings tears to my eyes. You are all such wonderful people and I am so thankful for you all. I spoke with my husband earlier and I am going to try to apply for SSI. I don't know anything about the procedure here in Wisconsin, but it will give me something to do to keep my mind busy. At least I'll have an idea of what I need to do and it's always nice being informed of all my options.

    I am finally lucky to have found a doctor who is willing to help me try new approaches and give me some good pain medication that seems to help. I've actually slept for the past couple nights and woke up to my alarm, which has been almost unheard of for the past year! I'm sure the social security will be an interesting process but maybe it will work in the end. Thanks.
  6. I was just wondering how is the lyrica working for you and what dose are you on?