Fibro/CFS Barbies

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by RockiAZ, Mar 14, 2006.

  1. RockiAZ

    RockiAZ New Member

    Since I have read some other humor on this site today, especially the one that Prickles bumped up (VERY funny stuff), I thought I would share one of my funnies that I wrote last summer and sent in to Fibro Aware. Humor is a must with any type of chronic illness. Hope this is okay to post and does not offend anyone.

    Live, Laugh, Love,
    Rocki

    *
    Edited Fatigued Barbie. Also - there is a new line of Fibro/CFS Barbies coming out soon!
    *
    *

    Light Heartedly Written 06/09/05 By “Rocki” Adams

    Introducing Fibro/CFS Barbie’s!

    Fatigued Barbie
    This little beauty represents all our Fibro/CFS Barbie’s, however with Fatigued Barbie, you don’t have to do a thing with her as she will just sit or will lay down where ever you place her! Goes by the nick-name "Crash" and comes complete with her own bed, couch, recliner and jammies. Warning: be prepared to carry her at a moments notice if she over does it.

    Fibro Fog Barbie
    Confused? Forgetful? No problem! You can rest assured that with Fibro Fog Barbie, she’ll keep all your secrets untold! Memory aids included: necklace pen, note pad and map.

    No Immune System Barbie
    Make sure not to take this Barbie outdoors or let anyone come near her that looks the slightest bit sick. This doll needs constant care, as she requires several medicines, supplements, vitamins and doctor visits. A list of her daily regimen included.

    IBS Barbie
    If you can handle bloating, cramping, constipation and/or diarrhea, then this dolls is for you!
    IBS pamphlet provided with a bonus recipe book Fiber Filled Foods!

    “You Don’t Look Sick” Barbie
    Sick? Awe, come on! Our “You Don’t Look Sick” Barbie is a quite a looker. On the outside she looks just like a “regular” gal. On the inside she’s in pain, feels sick, fatigued and hurts when hears negative comments that her illness isn’t real, yet forces a smile in return.

    Food Allergies Barbie
    With Food Allergies Barbie you will get to experience foods you’ve never tasted or even knew existed before since she cannot eat most everything you can. Signs of reaction vary, but you’ll know if she ate something she shouldn’t because she’ll get sick quick.

    Chemical Allergies Barbie
    Don’t take this little gal down the cleaning or a pool chemical aisle of a store as she’ll go into immediate allergic reaction and will be down for days! This also includes, but not limited to, perfumes, air fresheners, flowers, aromas, pollen, wind, air, etc.

    Pity Party Barbie
    Everyone’s invited, but most of the time, she’s at this party by herself. Comes complete with tears and pull string for blubbering. First year of Kleenex included.

    Pain Barbie
    Cannot touch, bend, move, or grab this gal. For display only, and NOT for small children.
    Caution: includes pain relief cream, ointment, heating pad and other pain relief items.

    Zombie Barbie
    If you are a night owl, then Zombie Barbie is for you! She doesn’t sleep a wink and will keep you company all night long – even if you don’t want her to.

    Active & Aware Barbie
    This gal also represents all other Fibro/CFS Barbie’s. She is determined to continue to educate herself and others about this invisible illness. She will continue to fight to stay strong and be positive that she will overcome obstacles and learn coping skills to better live with this. Please provide her with unconditional love, understanding, and care. She comes complete with a large supply of Fibrobands and information to be passed out to everyone.

    [This Message was Edited on 05/05/2006]
  2. Jen102

    Jen102 New Member

    with a sense of humor, i see. Funny, very funny. Blessings to you. jen102
  3. painandagony

    painandagony New Member

    That is hysterical!!! I am going to print that out. I have a number of people to send that to, who will get a charge out of that. I love it. Humor is the only way I have gotten through this illness. My friends say they feel like rock stars around me, because whenever they try to be funny, I'm laughing. I try and find humor everywhere.....laughing is healing, how am I not better!!
  4. jane32

    jane32 New Member

    so funny!
  5. angeljoe

    angeljoe New Member

    I love this post. I really like the fibro fog barbie. I have a hard time completing sentences these days. You have really been thinking about this one. Thanks for the humor. I needed that!
    Angela
  6. RockiAZ

    RockiAZ New Member

    Glad you liked it. I have more, but I'll post them once in a while.

    Here's to a "good" day, hour, moment....

    Live, Laugh, Love,
    Rocki
  7. libra55

    libra55 New Member

    One more for ya.....

    Let's not forget "Overactive Bladder Barbie". Needs bathroom on a moment's notice. Comes complete with map of every public restroom within a 100 mile radius, three changes of clothes, and a month's supply of Depends.

    Great thread!

    Michelle
  8. RockiAZ

    RockiAZ New Member

    THAT IS TERRIFIC!! I SO agree and am the same way! Can't believe I forgot that one (forgot? forgot what?)

    In fact, I just sent a funny e-mail to my hubby and told him we didn't have to worry about "potty" breaks any more, even while driving 5 minutes from the house. I found a pic of an "outhouse trike"... it's funnier if you could see it: picture an adult tricycle with a toilet as the seat surrounded by 3 walls and a top. He wants to buy it for me and said he'll even put a "splash guard" on it!!

    Live, Laugh, Love,
    Rocki
  9. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    Now that is funny! What a nice laugh first thing in the AM here.

    Pain Barbie reminds me of last night....my hands, arms were hurting so badly that I actually used some 024! It is good stuff, but if you haven't tried it, the odor is very strong so I try to use it when my husband isn't at home.

    But, I had to do it. When he walked into the bedroom, he commented that I was using the stuff again! Yep, and I bet the people across the street smell it, too, I told him through my teary eyes brought on by the waves of 024 odor.

    He's a great guy and wasn't complaining, but the image of your Barbie and all her rubs and heating pad (mine's my constant companion) brought that back up.

    Thanks for the good laugh.

    Thanks for sharing your gift of writing.

    Sue
  10. berrytired

    berrytired New Member

  11. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    for funniest post of the week.

    By the way, I ran into Alzheimer's Ken at the Sr. Citizens' Center yesterday.

    He said, "Barbie who?"
  12. gymmbabe

    gymmbabe New Member

    This is great. I've had a bad day and this just brightened it right up! Thanks for the laugh--I really needed it!
  13. TwinMa

    TwinMa New Member

    I'm so glad people post stuff to make us laugh! This was a really good one.
  14. jenni4736

    jenni4736 New Member

    Way to go! This is a great way to explain this DD in a humerous way!
    jenni
  15. julieisfree05

    julieisfree05 New Member

    My sister used to have a bumper sticker that said,

    I want to be Barbie
    That b*tch has EVERYTHING!

    LOL!

    julie (is free!)

    I'm not as good as I once was
    but I'm as good once
    as I ever was! - Toby Keith
  16. RockiAZ

    RockiAZ New Member

    Prickles, thanks for bumping and glad you and the others like this (I've been down for a spell and haven't been on the computer much).

    We gotta laugh, what else can we do?!

    Rocki
  17. carebelle

    carebelle New Member

    Maybe we could get this packaged in a cute Drug store bag and sell them to raise awareness of this DD. LOL Or maybe sent Barbie to CONGRESS in a big box, that would get attention .we could even include directions for use in spanish. with a note attached made in the usa under strick government reg.with recall information in every state
  18. leubie

    leubie New Member

    I LOVE IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!LAURA
  19. mme_curie68

    mme_curie68 New Member

    DON'T FORGET....

    It's All In Your Head Barbie, also known as
    I Think You're Just Depressed Barbie

    Comes with a full list of symptoms that Doctor Ken will dismiss outright.

    Dr. Ken is also equipped with several action phrases -

    "Have you been to other doctors asking for medication before?"

    "I think you would be better off seeing a psychiatrist."

    "I'll give you enough Ambien to anesthetize a flea every other month - that's all I can do for you."

    "I don't believe fibro is a real disease,Barbie."

    Hours of fun and enjoyment for the entire family!

    Don't forget, for an extra $9.95, It's All In Your Head Barbie comes with family member Sullen Skipper.

    Sullen Skipper has an embedded voice chip that activates as she passes by Barbie on the couch. Who could forget these gems -

    "You know, if you just lose some weight and exercise, you'll feel so much better..."

    "You're home all day, can't you at least do a couple loads of laundry?"

    "I think you're faking it to get extra attention."

    Warning: If Sullen Skipper's voice chip is activated more than 20 times next to It's All In Your Head Barbie, Barbie will convert to Going Postal Barbie!!!!!!

    Going Postal Barbie's Robotic Arm of Revenge will grab any object within reach and clock Sullen Skipper within an inch of her life...


    [This Message was Edited on 05/05/2006]
  20. windblade

    windblade Active Member

    This was awesomely funny - majorly laughing all the way through!!! Wonderfully written - I want to read it again already.

    Also loved the 'additional' Barbies. :)