Fibrofog + Poverty = BooBoo

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by kadywill, Dec 18, 2002.

  1. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    yesterday, I needed a few items at the old FoodLion, so I gathered up my checkbook and decided that I had no balance! So, I returned a gift from KMart and got the cash back. OK, so far, so good. Then I took a receipt back to my pharmacy after I'd found they'd overcharged me and got a little more cash. OK, now I thought I'd have enough to go to FoodLion, so I drove there. I was really feeling a little woozy and confused like I was driving around in circles, but I congratulated myself that I'd also mailed my Christmas cards and most recent onslaught of Social Security forms at the post office without a hitch, so I drove on to the store with my short list. I had the items in the cart and I handed the checkout lady my MVP card and coupons and, instead of giving her my newly-obtained cash, I used my ATM card!!!!!!!! Can you believe this??? I worked so hard to get this piddly amount of money so that I would not overdraw this checking acount and then I turned around and used the card that would do just that!!!!!!! I tried to stop it, but it was accepted and there was apparently nothing I could do, so I had to drive all the way to my bank and deposit a measley $37.00 in bills and quarters to cover the debit. I was embarrassed....see, I am not used to carrying ANY cash. I use my ATM card for almost everything because I overspend if I have cash. Now, I can't even hide this from my husband with whom I share this checkbook. I hate it when he witnesses my fogs!!!!
    I guess I *should* laugh, but it's too soon for that.

  2. LisaMay

    LisaMay New Member

    Kady. You could have "charged" more than you collected! It's so sad that we can't even keep small tasks in check, but then again... It will be alright.

    Thanks for the chuckle, Lisa
  3. AnnG

    AnnG New Member

    One time I was writing out the bills. I always keep a running balance as I write each check. Well, I wrote a check to the propane people for my checkbook BALANCE instead of the amount due! I can't remember how my husband found out thats what I did but he had to drive to their offices and get the check back! I felt like a fool!
  4. Rain122865

    Rain122865 New Member

    I think I win the award for this one......I deposited 1000.00 in the wrong bank account AND ended up with a foreclosure notice on our house...that I forgot to tell my husband we even got. We did find the 1000.00 a month later in the wrong bank in an account we do not even use, have no idea how I put it there still, and we did get the foreclosure stopped and paid for. Lucky for me he just blew it off when I told him what happened and just wanted to know what was for dinner...LOL. He is a great man.
  5. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    that *is* hubby would've *died* or *killed* over that one!!! LOL
    Oh well, crazy is crazy, no matter how severe!!
  6. dobegood

    dobegood New Member

    I used to be one of those who spent my CARD on everything I bought, including paying bills.
    The card I have is a "Direct" card, which means if there isn't any money on the bank account, I can't buy anything. BUT that was no problem, I could always use VISA and be charged later. Yabbayabbayabbayabba!

    It was easy to use the card because it didn't FEEL like I was spending real money.
    I had too much credit at VISA and paid huge amounts of interest and "other" cost, just to pay the interest!

    One day, I finally (a year ago), I sat down and took a look at what I had paid in 2000 JUST in interest and "other" cost for having those two cards!

    Want to take a guess?
    Try 700 $ in ONE YEAR alone!
    Along with some bank loans to cover the credit cards, I ended up paying over 1500 $ in one year for nothing!

    I changed right there and then.
    I still have my Direct Card but now I take out 1 ammount a month for food etc. Bills are paid over the Internet, free of charge here. The loans are paid off and I use VISA when I travel, that is all.

    I save money everywhere I can now. Use of electrisity, food, haven't bought clothes in two years (had 4 closets filled), borrow my audio books instead of buying them, save on free SMS'S over the Internet (several places you can send for free), use MIRC instead of phone calls to Iceland every day (used to have 500 $ a month in phone-bill, had a cable connection for the Internet instead of ISDN line, cancelled the magazines/newspapers (read on the Internet) etc etc etc etc.

    I am not kidding you but since I changed, I have saved over 300 $ a month at times and I have money in the bank.
    I know, many people doesn't even have the money we are provided here and it often seems hopeless, as "where do we begin"? I don't mean to be offensive but I was wondering how one can save in your country? We don't have coupons here, just to mention one difference.

    Anyone else had these thoughts on "false" money that we pay for useage of checks, credit cards etc etc....
  7. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    have NEVER used a credit card!! Not ever!! We may not have the up-to-date gadgets and gizmos that a lot of folks have, but all we owe each month are our monthly bills, a truck payment and a mortgage. We can't buy ONE single gift for Christmas this year BECAUSE we won't use suits us best because we both worry so much if we owe anything. I'm going to try to refinance our home after Christmas because our interest rate is too high. Until we work out a budget without my salary (now that I am not working, we'll have to do without a lot of things we did have.
    Our ATM card is *direct* also and we can only deduct what we have in there! This is the only way I'd use it, believe me.
    I feel for my friends who have gone so heavily in debt for Christmas. Christ has no part of that, IMHO. These folks will suffer dearly for this during the year and do the same next year. It's just too much for me. I like things done simply.
  8. dobegood

    dobegood New Member

    Dear kadywill,

    It seems you you live a lot smarter than I lived in the past :)
    I don't know what ATM card means and I was wondering how people "pay" in USA. All I can judge from, are my travels and being in USA twice doesn't really make me an expert (far from it, I would say)

    Things are so different over here and I feel ignorant. I love to learn about how other people live elsewhere.
    In Iceland, my second home, I am the ONLY one in the village (350 people living there) who uses cash only.
    The rest of them will go into the supermarket, buy one Coke and pay with VISA. Then, once a month, they receive the bill with "interest" and other costs.
    My boyfriend lived that life for 53 years. He has now done what I do and uses cash only. He has also reduced his expenses that way.

    I would love to learn more about how people manage in another country. I could tell from your bank story that you are indeed an admirable woman who hates debts.

    I started knitting in early August (got bored in the small village, being a city girl) and have knitted almost all the Christmas presents this year. Pillow cases, mostly :)

    What the........It's the thought that counts!
    I don't like to be "stingy" but travelling back/forth to Iceland twice a year, as well as saving up for a later date, means I have to be careful.

    I suppose it's the same all over, really :)
    I feel sorry for those who have to place themselves in debts for Christmas. I can understand it though, especially if there are children in the family.
  9. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    ATM is "automatic teller machine" and, in the past, all you could do with it was to use it to withdraw some of your account $$ from a machine 24 hours a day. Now, ours is a "checkcard" meaning that it can also be used at most grocery stores, restaurants and Wal*Mart-type stores as you would a personal check, but it is easier and I don't have to provide identification proof at the checkout counter. I prefer it. It CAN also be used for credit as well as "debit". ( this is the way I use it) That way, ONLY the money I have in my account is used; even better than a check because I can't overdraw!
    I would love to be able to knit or *make* gifts for MD-inforced early retirement wasn't expected and I've only been out of work for 4 and a half weeks. I had not bought any gifts yet, as was usual for me. Now, I have just had to accept that I won't. My friends and family understand that this can't be helped and thry're fine with it. My son even offered to buy presents that I'd promised my granddaughters for me!!
    All is well and I shall celebrate the *real* reason for Christmas!
  10. dobegood

    dobegood New Member

    Thank you so much for the information on ATM card and other payments over there.

    Your reasons for celebrating Christmas are much more admirable than mine. I am not religious, I'm afraid.
    I love little presents, good food and good TV with a
    footmassage on the side, given by my boyfriend.

    There is one thing I do though that can "excuse" my selfish reasons for celebrating.
    I try to give to the less fortunate than myself.

    This year, I am bringing Christmas Dinner with all the trimmings, which my father makes being a Chef, to a couple of very old neighbours of mine.

    They live on the 8th and 5th floor here.
    Both men and in their 70's. They spend Christmas with each other every year, no family comes to visit.

    I am invited for a Christmas Drink in the afternoon and I leave their Christmas Dinner to enjoy later in the evening. I have also knitted them both a scarf this year.

    In the end, we can only try to do our best and give what we can. I suppose that is my true celebration, all things considered.

    May you too have a wonderful Christmas.
    It was wonderful "chatting" with you and I hope we may again one day.
  11. pam_d

    pam_d New Member

    Kady, thank you for your story---I think we have all done those things, not all of us would admit it! Today I left the mail in my refrigerator (set it down while I was putting milk away & my hands were full), luckily I discovered it the next time I opened the fridge before my husband or daughter found it---at least I can be a "closet" idiot (my husband didn't comment on the frigid temperature of the mail)...

    I just wanted to say, after the holidays, when you might have some time & if you feel well enough, do pursue the refinancing thing---you said your interest rate was high, and now they are incredibly low, you would probably realize a big savings each month---$$ in your pocket!

    And, dobegood---I just love your stories from your part of the world, I am so glad you are here on this board!

    Happy Holidays, everyone!

  12. LauraLea

    LauraLea New Member

    I know what you mean I've done almost the exact thing. I did have almost enough money in the bank to cover, but I had to deposit $10.00 to cover it.

    Hey trust me the bank doesn't care if you deposit 37.00 dollars or 3700.00 dollars. I worked at a bank for 11 years and the teller don't care how much you are depositing.

    Do sweat it.....
  13. karen2002

    karen2002 New Member

    With the evening "fog" rolling in---you'll probably forget this incident and the embarrassment by tommorrow!

    My ineptness never ceases to amaze my family, and myself--lot's of raised eyebrows. Laughing's our only defense---humor saves our sanity.

  14. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    Your last sentence said it all, 'just laugh this one off!

    Lately I have been pretty good with the 'memory' thing, but if I get too tired, stressed or just plain upset, my whole world goes haywire!

    As for those credit cards, I have two that I ran up when I was so sick. It was so hard to go out and shop, that I got the cards, well I won't make that mistake again. Am paying them off and cutting them up.

    The only one that makes sense is the American Express, you pay if off each month, no interest. That one I have for 12 years without a problem. But some of the companies won't take it, so I had two others, and those are the problem that I am dealing with now. But no more!

    Checks I do fine with, but I don't use the ATM for anything but to get cash, no shopping.

    I started just getting cash to shop, that makes me spend less than a card. When I run out of cash, its time to go home!

    My family is small, so Christmas is not a big debt thing, plus I buy gifts all year, so when Christmas comes, I just have to wrap them. I do not go into debt for the holidays.

    I also quit all the decorations,and cooking, its too hard to deal with anymore, and my children have a dinner at one or the others homes now.

    Handmade gifts are just wonderful, I used to do that, but can't anymore.

    My daughter is seeing a gentleman from Wales, and he does not want or need the average gift, so each year I make him a Fruit, nuts, candy, cookies, basket, he loves it. Said it reminds him when he was a child in Europe that is what he got for a gift at Christmas.

    Yes, the true meaning of Christmas is long gone, its a commerical thing now, there is little or no meaning of the day set aside as the Birth of Christ anymore. Very said indeed.

    YOu ladies have a blessed holiday!

    Shalom, Shirl

  15. dlizard

    dlizard New Member

    her's my latest..... a freind came to visit,, she brought her keys to get here right?? well.... we searched and searched when it was time for her to leave but alas..... no keys... she had the keypad thing to get in her car then had a spare key in her purse.. so she left. I continued to search for the keys..... well.. never found em. The next morning,,,, I opened MY* purse and voila`.... there are her keys..... I have no recollection fo doing this and know that she wouldn't have..... fog, yeah its thick!!! Good luck!
  16. joannie1

    joannie1 New Member

    Don't come down on yourself for this Kaddy. Everybody does silly little things that are more imbarressing to themselves then anyone would really think they are. My Mom has done this type of thing and she doesn't have an excuse. Heck i just had a large letter written and instead of editing it I deleted it. GRRRR...
    Times are tough for us too with Christmas. We have large families on both sides of me and my Hubbys side. Plus we have three young children. I am very fortunate to be quite crafty and still able to do it. I do things from making swags, to wooden painted plaques to making wicker baskets into Holiday scenes. So, with things the way they are this year I pulled out all of my things I have accumulated throughout the years and began making Christmas gifts for everyone. I made 10 christmas ornaments out of plaster of paris, painted them and put felt behind them for my neices and nephews. For the childrens teachers i went to the dollar store and spent about $5.00 on nativity scene stuff and made all their teachers baskets. Our youngest has always been very sickly and is behind some at school from missing due to it. This year he is in the title 1 reading recovery group where he has one on one with the teacher. (He is doing great with it) anyway, I had made one of the baskets with the little childrens chior and he picked that for his reading teacher because they were holding books and she loves books. I took the basket to the children at school on Friday and Joseph and I walked down to her class to give it to her. She was so happy that she honestly had tears in her eyes. Joesph was so proud of himself and he said MY MOMMY made that just for you and the children even have books can you see them? She hugged him tight and said this is the best Christmas present I have ever gotten Joseph is it beautiful. He said I knew you would like it. He was so proud of it too. So, that is what really makes me feel good. My Mom knows our struggles and she insisted I MAKE her something. So, her and my step Dad are VERY proud grandparents and I made them a wooden grandparents are special plaque for their wall of nothing but 13 grandchildren. By making so many things this year I saved us a lot of money and I know that the things will be appreciated. I always say that Christmas is about being with family and love and everything I make I put my heart and soul into.
    Happy Holidays.