Wow, I look back to two years ago when I was bed ridden and had a terrible doctor who thought I was nuts. Then amazingly I found a Rheumy who wasn't afraid to listen, try different treatments, etc. I am so busy now, work full time, will be graduating with a 4.0 with my bachelors in the fall...my life is great and I do have a great quality of life. My pain has been so minimal thanks to my medications that I am taking. I know I have an illness because occasional annoying pain rears it's ugly head but not like when I was bed ridden and had no medication. Well today has been so very horrible. For the first time in over a year and a half I have no pain meds. It's my own fault, I forgot to call my Dr. before the weekend to get my refill. I feel like someone ran me over with a 4 wheeler. My body is stiff and pounding with pain and my cognitive function is basically shot. "forgetting" that I was ill for the longest time was good denial, but today I cannot deny that I have this darn disease and just how bad it is. I just want to crawl into bed and lay there until Monday when I can get my refill. I hate to have to be dependant on drugs, but they work and give me a quality of life in regard to being able to function. Anyone else ever forget they had this darn disease then get smacked in the face with it all of a sudden?