From Suzan..just an update...

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Suzan, Nov 3, 2007.

  1. Suzan

    Suzan New Member

    So many of you were so supportive of me the first weeks after my husband told me 'he can't and won't be my caretaker for the rest of his life'..

    "HE" has chose a path of mean spiritedness...toward me, toward my sons...and it is hard for me to believe that although all this was 'his' idea and choice, he has now seemingly fancied himself as a victim!
    Crazy what people do!

    I want to thank you all. You held me up during the lowest point I had ever found myself in. You were all part of the support group I depended on for my strength and my sanity.

    It has been 3 months since the 'announcement'.
    Much has happened and yet I still feel like I can't wait to be farther along in the whole process!
    FM has been rearing it's nasty little head as you would expect with all the stress. That is partly why I haven't posted in a while. Just trying to destress, and take care of my physical health. I have a doctor appt on Wed. The first one..breaking in a new doc..wish me luck!

    Right now I am waiting for my initial court date, my atty. has ,with my help, come to an amount of $$ that I feel is reasonable for now. It is only a temporary order..we will fight for the bulk of what I am receiving at the final hearing.
    Meanwhile, living at my son's home is working out ..but as you can imagine not with out it's own stresses. I can hear the pain in my son when we talk about almost anything that has to do with his daily life in his house with his mom and brother. I think that for him, it is worse having us in HIS house..than it is for us being here. I KNOW I had no where else to go...but sometimes I think my son is even angry with me for being here....but he would never say that. I imagine he has many feelings to work thru..just like his mom does!

    My younger son found a job, not the ideal job..but it will pay his bills. That was a huge relief for us all. He cannot wait to be able to be independant again, and will do his best to save money, so he can move out on his own.

    All in all, I guess you could say I am doing well, considering my circumstances. I am starting to see some friends..starting to paint small ways..starting to live again.


  2. tansy

    tansy New Member

    There is life after divorce. Once I made the decision it felt like a heavy load had been lifted. After the divorce was finalised and I had moved to another home it was like starting life over again.

    When ill being in a the wrong relationship is worse than not being in a relationship at all. My ex behaved badly initially but I made it clear this was unacceptable, he is not as tough as he likes to make himself out to be.

    20 years later I know this was one of the best decisions I've made in my life. I have no regrets because through that marriage I had our son, and there were other things to appreciate too.

    Good luck with your new doctor.

    TC, Tansy
  3. victoria

    victoria New Member

    I'm also wishing you good luck with the new doctor, hope s/he proves to be good!

    I admire your courage to do what you've done, I know it takes a lot of strength; I have a friend in similar circumstances that you had, complete with ill health (possible MS and other problems) but she doesn't see it for what it is. It's sad because even her own daughter is upset for her.

    But we do what we can when we can, I certainly understand that.

    Just a thought, since you're in a new place ... is there perhaps a local support group for CF/FM/ME, or even support group for "chronic illnesses"?

    Our regional hospital here offers the latter, altho we all basically have CF/FM dx's. But it has been a great way to hear about local doctors, what others are pursuing or have found out, as well as socialize (we try to go to lunch afterwards and at least one other time per month).

    All the best,

  4. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    How are you doing? It's been a couple of weeks since you posted and with the holidays here, it can be tough!

    I hope you are still painting and being with friends and moving ahead.

  5. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    Bumping up so you might see this!

    We are all wondering how you are doing? I hope you are facing a HAPPY Christmas and fun-filled New Years!

    Let us know how you are!