Funny Sayings (maybe even wisdom)

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by rockgor, Feb 1, 2007.

  1. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    From various places on the net. No authors to give credit to:

    My wife and I had words. I didn't get to use mine.

    Just think: Every morning is the start of a new error.

    Seen it all (pretty much); done a lot; and can't remember most of it.

    In this journey of life, by the time you are old enough to know your way around, you are not going anywhere.

    I started out w/ nothing. Still got most of it left.

    A mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.
    On the other hand, I did have an open mind, but my brains fell out.

    I do respect my elders. Just keeps getting harder to find any.

    I can only hope that reading these will make you a better person. It has me.

  2. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    Liked the one about starting out wi nothing & still having most of it left.
    Thats about the same as you come into this life wi nothing & you go out wi nothing.
    Here's a piece of wisdom from Britney Spears in her younger days:
    "I want to wait to have sex until I'm married".
    I wonder where she went wrong,haha.
  3. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    "marriage is a sentence" before, Linda. Course I've heard it's an institution.

    Me too, Paul. Whenever I want some guidance and advice in my life I turn to Brittny Spears. She's one sharp cookie.

    Here's something I came across that somebody said (Woody Allen)? Thank God I'm an antheist!

    Well, have to see if I can get to the 99 cent store. It's good to have goals. That's been mine for the last 2 weeks.

  4. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    Loved the one from Woody Allen,gave me a right laugh.

    I think we're being ripped off over here,it's only pound stores we've got such as Poundland,Poundstretchers etc et.While you've got 99c stores,not fair,ah well it may because Americans are easier to please,lol.
  5. kholmes

    kholmes New Member

    You've certainly hit the iceberg on the head. Did you know that a cruise can run from $3000 to $20,000, if you want to go overboard?

    If you don't get this message, let me know.
  6. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Ken. Since I did get the message, I guess I should not let you know, yes?

    Once got a letter from another atty. The PS said, "Please notify us if you do not get this letter as it will indicate there is a problem w/ the mails."

    Them thar cruises sound like a lot of fun alright, unless you happen to hit the salmonella special.

    Yes, one can really go overboard on a cruise and one can also pay too much. About 20 years ago Gordon and I were at a bridge club in Sacramento. A flyer announced a 90 day bridge cruise: $1000 per day.

    Paul, do you guys still use a stone as a measure of weight? (I read it was 17 of our pounds.)
    Over here we don't use pounds or stones the way you do, but we have a commedian named Paula Poundstone. Just put her book on hold at the library.

    Here's something you might find funny, or possibly intriguing. Not from the net but from my very own personal life.

    One day many years ago when I was a Social Worker I walked by a colleague's desk and heard her say, "You mean they all ran away?"

  7. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    Who ran away??All the social workers??haha.

    Yeh rock,we still use stones & pounds over here in relation to weights but if the European Union get their way we'll be all dealing in kilos.All our local butchers,shopkeepers have been warned that all their goods must be displayed in Kilos,after years of dealing in pounds.
    1 stone=14 pounds
    1 pound=16 ounces
    & for comparison
    1kg =2.2pounds
    Very confusing don't you think.
  8. Denamay

    Denamay New Member

    I once heard a co worker answer the phone by saying "A----- Social Services, how may I hurt you?".
  9. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Well, even Social Workers can get out of sorts, I guess.

    I remember an insane study that went on for a couple weeks back in the 60s. It was called Random Moment something or other. It was pretty annoying.

    Twice a day the supervisor blew a whistle. You had to stop what you were doing and fill out some form about what you were doing when the whistle blew.

    I felt if the thing were truly random at some point we would have simultaneous random moments. Never happened tho.