My medical records are still missing. And I had a long talk with my lawyer today. He said to let it go. He said the only way to fight it is to sue the hospital and that it would take tons of money, which I don't have, many years, and we still probably would never see them. I'm very upset because alot of long term CFIDS patients end up with their medical records suddenly missing. And I feel they are getting away with it one more time. And I'm not up for the fight. I'm just not well enough to be going to the local Senator's office and following up on it and making a big press stink over it. And this is exactly what they count on. Too ill to fight. So on top of that, I'm suffering terribly with a right hip and back thing. I'm suspecting it's related to my Armour thyroid med. I'm nearly crippled from it and it's only been since they changed the formulation. I think they put something awful in the fillers. So I've got a doc appointment this week to see what can be done. I'm really discouraged, disgusted and exhausted. And I just want it to stop already. I have no life from this disease. I do not see one coming in the future. And from what my lawyer just told me, without the vaccination records from my medical file, I could be very screwed in the future if I am ever well enough to want to go back to school or to travel far. I just feel like I'm in this cage. It's a nice looking cage, but I can rarely ever leave it. It's like some awful prison/hell dimension. I get to watch everyone else in the world have a life and I can't have one. And I have lost everything in my life from this disease. And it just won't stop. And I don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore because nothing works. And I have yet to see a light at the end of the tunnel.