God takes some people by the hand and leads them and gently moves them. Me....... He always kicks my pants back into a reality check. Yes, I have been having depression, and flares. My flares all seem self induced when my emotions get out of control. I hestitate to think what I would be like if not already on an anti depressant. The kick........ God wants me to re evaluate. My son is a health care professional and lost his co- worker and friend Tony two nights ago. Tony, 37, single, working on his PhD and working in my son's office as the physicicist. At Christmas Tony's biggest problem was if he should continue working while studying for the advanced degree. A simple cough. A chest x ray. So loaded with a very, very aggressive form of cancer, it was surrounding every major organ. From a working man with a good career, to signing his own DNR before they put him on a vent as he couldn't breathe. My son saw him on Sat. and he had only enough breath for two word replies. 48 hours later after the breathing machine took over, his body relaxed and he slipped away. I am reminded my opinion that no parent should ever have to bury a child, no matter the age. Thus my tears have focused on this mother and family, and away from myself. God has reminded me to prioritize my life and my problems. I need to go and play "He Leadeth Me" possibly changing the words a bit. That is what I shall do right now. Play hymns that I find comfort in. Bless all of you who read this and can identify.