Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by ilovepink4, Aug 24, 2008.

  1. ilovepink4

    ilovepink4 Member

    Somebody please tell me something to cheer me up!!! I need your help....

    I haven't been posting much this summer due to kids home from school and me ACTUALLY able to do some things with them! It has been wonderful....every little moment of feeling normal again....it was brief and it was on and off....and now, I am getting bummed out, just like I figured I would when it ended.....

    This is really hard trying to get my mind back to the mindset of a bed bound person....

    I just need someone to talk to...there isn't anyone here, in my house, that is.... that gets it

    man this sucks....PS the worst of all? my daughter is leaving for college on Wednesday....I can't go with...she will be 8 hours from home...I probably won't see her until christmas because I can't travel...my hubby and boys will be able to travel to see her at thanksgiving....i will have to stay here in bed and also, taking care of our other daughter....I will miss my daughter horribly...she is my eyes and ears to the outside world....she keeps me updated on things...she keeps me company...I HATE THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
    [This Message was Edited on 08/24/2008]
  2. poets

    poets Member

    And I'm really sorry to hear how you're feeling. I know how it is when one of your children leave home. My daughter only moved 35 minutes away and I felt lost. I can't imagine her moving 8 hours away. If she was any further away I probably wouldn't be able to travel to see her as much as I do.

    I'm left with my son (who understands FM because he has it) and my husband who obviously doesn't. At least I have my son here because he's on disability for epilepsy.

    It seems you never know how you're going to feel from day to day, and I'm thankful for any time that I can get out of the house and do something. Anything.

    But.........at least we know that in spite of these bad days, there will be some good ones in the midst. That gives me something to look forward to. And even though I can't reach out and physically touch my friends on the board, I feel I have a "refuge" so to speak, where someone will understand and hear me, and really care. It's been a lifesaver for me.

    So I (we're) here for you. And I'm offering you a gentle hug, and letting you know that I care and that I'll be praying that your body and spirit as well will be uplifted and strengthened.

    We're all in this together. Keep posting. You can make it. WE can make it. Together.

  3. lvjesus

    lvjesus Member

    I wish I had some advice, but I don't. I just wanted to pop into your post and support you by letting you know that I know how you feel, at least in part. I was in remission for a year and a half and a few months ago it started up again. I was bummed out too.

    I have sort of accepted my fate in a way for now and I trying to just "roll with the punches". It sounds like you are much worse off than me, though. I do work full time, although some days it is a struggle to make it to the end of the day and I have suffered horribly the past week or so with PMS, but it has let up some now. You sound bedridden practically. I am very sorry and again, I wish I had some advice.

    I will say try to stay positive and not dwell on it too much. I know sometimes that is very hard, but try to do what you can do that you like, movies, tv, reading (if you can), wear soft comfy clothes, etc. Whatever you can think of that will make you feel comforted (except heavy drinking, of course!).

    Seriously, give yourself permission to pamper yourself, try to accept the limitations and remember what you CAN still do. You can talk to your daughter on the phone as much as she can talk. I know it is not the same as seeing her, but it is something. How about a web cam? You could get one and she could get one and you could talk "face to face".

    Take care of you and try to keep a positive outlook, even if you think that sound stupid, because it helps.

  4. ilovepink4

    ilovepink4 Member

    thank you Meg and Sonya for your kind and thoughtful messages.....you both gave me different things to focus on and it does help...the hardest part of this is getting your mind back to being content with a smaller world....I was doing okay but then, after feeling well enough to do some stuff this summer, it is difficult to go back to being sick in bed all the time...

    my family's expectations have changed again...they think that I can do more than I can...because i was able to keep the house neat and the laundry done for a few months...now hubby has to lower his expectations again...he has to adjust to it all over again...and I feel guilty all over again because I am not able to be the mom I used to be...

    and on top of this adjustment is i have a little over 24 hours left before my daughter leaves for college...i keep having these moments of pure panic...and I think," Shecannot leave! I am not ready. She is not ready. Who will help her when she is sick? Who will help her with...well, what ever she needs?" then I feel depressed and worried about what it is going to feel like with her away...

    we have web cams set up on her lap top and her sister's laptop...i recently got my daughter with the CP a laptop because she will be able to talk to her sister live instead of having someone type out an email for her...she can't type or use a phone due to her disability...she can talk just fine ON the phone but someone has to dial and hold it...or put it on speaker....so the web cam is going to be nice! I need to get one for my laptop...i should have done it already because if I have problems setting itup, my DD won't be here to help me figure it out!she was the one who got it ready in DD 1 and DD 2's laptops....she also hasn't set up my Ipod yet...

    sorry for the rambling...I just wanted to thank you both...
  5. poets

    poets Member

    And please keep us posted. You'll be in my prayers.

  6. jenn_c

    jenn_c New Member

    especially with your daughter leaving for college. My daughter will be 16 next month and we are extremely close. I am already having panic knowing that it won't be long before she goes off to college. I have a 9 yr old son and love him just as much. I can't believe I am already panicing about this. You mentioned having another daughter at home with some issues?
    No wonder you had a relapse. Stress can bring it on. Please knoe we are here for you and I hope you get some rest and peace. Jenn
  7. mujuer

    mujuer New Member

    Wow, you have a beautiful family. I am right in the trenches with you now. I live in WA state and have two boys down in L.A. going to college and a married daughter in Georgia along with my grandaughter who is two. When one left it was hard but not as hard as having them all gone. I hate it so much but do go see all of them as well as my family back in Kansas.

    I had a wonderful warm summer and felt as close to healthy as I could and now the weather is turning and boy and howdy I know how you feel. We have cold nasty rainy seasons here and very short summers so I suffer thru. Each year gets a little harder to hit the skids and go from feeling good to feeling awful all of the time. I only see my kids once a year and it is so hard but we talk alot via e-mails and the phone. I know that I did my job well since they all left and are doing really well. That is the best reward. I had to go see a counselor for a time just to get thru the first pangs of "empty nest syndrome". It helped me get thru the first year. Hang in there. P
  8. ilovepink4

    ilovepink4 Member

    again, thanks ladies for your words!

    mujuer, Washington state sounds like a place that would really irritate the fibro...all the damp weather would be hard on a body!! minnesota is hard with the bitter cold...and the extreme weather changes...but that damp, rainy weather is tough...

    tonight is my little girl's first night in her dorm room...sniffle...and she didn't text or call to say good night...but, we did talk numerous times when she needed help with some medical forms...and to tll me about how her room turned out...(roomier than she expected and she DIDN'T bring too much stuff after all! a big worry for her...)

    i discovered that she left stuff in every drawer, shelf and in her closet in her room....dirty sheets on the bed, pj's on the bed, bath robe hanging in the bathroom...it is like she is coming back in a ew days! she left lots of nailpolish, make up, hair stuff, clothes, (tons!!!), toiletries, even open boxes of tampons in the bathroom!!! this is so weird...and she is not lazy or a pig...it is like she doesn't really want to lose her spot here at home! we won't let her brothers move into her room....but, this is funny about the drawers in the bathroom...

    i better hush up here...this is off topic...

    but, i really do miss her...i think that is why i was flaring so badly....the stress of her leaving maybe...i hope i can get back some of the progress i made this summer...

    thanks again, friends...