Had the dreaded mental testing today!!!!!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by silky17, Aug 15, 2005.

  1. silky17

    silky17 New Member

    Look at my little ICON and see what I thought of those tests. HAH!

    What a mind boggling episode! I was in there 3 full hours on a hard card table chair. I bet there was something to that. What do you all think? I had one 5 min. break. I tried not to complain at all ( I am sure that really didn't help the process), But unfortuanantly I feel I passed with flying colors.

    Where the heck did my memory come from today? I am not a good liar and don't think it is right anyway but I decided......if I am turmed denied then I have to look at things at a new prospective.

    I am now going to sue my private disability and hope that God is on my side here again with this one. I can hang but can my home?

    I am amazed at how I have been able to get this far on so little . That is why I can not believe that some have no belief on our higher power. My son would say that is my own belief that gets me there, Not a higher power. I say poohie! The nicest way I can say it here.

    Anyway I am through and not sure what will happen next. Heads up from anyone will keep me inspired. Thanks to you all again and again!

    Do you think that remembering numbers backwards and making stories up with pics will slice my own throat? I just kept saying to myself you have lost! But I will not compromise my integrity. Have a good day.

  2. catgal

    catgal New Member

    Hi Silky~~Can't sleep, so I am up late. I finally had to apply for disability in October/04 after having a mild stroke, MAJOR stroke followed by a moderate stroke. I am 56, was born with severe asthma/allergies & IBS; have had FM/CFS since my teens, later on life after losing my only pregnancy at the age of 29, I had to have a radical hysterectomy and gradually developed osteo, rheumatoid, and psoriac arthritis; I always throught the horrible pain in my back was due to the FM & flares because I hurt all over all the time, but found out in my 50's when I could not get out of bed one morning for work no matter how hard I tried--the back problem was extremely advanced degenerative disc disease with multiple other back problems to the point that I was classfied as "inoperable". With the help of my regular physician and a pain specialist, they gave me high powered narcotic pain relievers, soma, and bag full of other monthly scripts so I could continue to work as I loved my job though it was very painful to continue to work. However, they told me I needed to quit work and file for disability--which I did not want to do. The last two years I continued to work did alot of damage to myself, and I ended up having 3 strokes. All 3 strokes hit the same exact right side of the brain from my forehead to the spinal column. The MAJOR stroke wiped out my memory, severely affected my eyes, heart, and seriously damaged other brain functions. It has taken alot of hard work and physical therapy to just be able to improve this much. However, as some things got better--others got worse. My eye sight for one, and the specialists fear I'm going to end up blind.

    I was medically terminated from my job I loved so much in May/04. In october/04 I applied for disability. I went through the initial telephone interview that lasted 4 and 1/2 hours, and I so terribly sick that day with my asthma I could hardly breathe or talk, and I couldn't remember dates and things the asked me. But the gal who interviewed me over the phone took compassion on me, rephrased my answers in the language SSA wanted to see, and red flagged my chart as an emergency, and sent it to a SSA Team that very day, and had it put on top of the piles of applications.

    In January/05, they started sending me to a series of tests--5 in all, and one of them was a mental health exam. Like you said, I had to sit on a hard card table chair, and the first thing he said to me as he put down my chart was, "Life hasn't been very good to you over the past several years--and I did what I promised myself I wouldn't do--I cried throughout the whole exam as he went through all the questions and tests that brought up all the griefs and losses I had experienced. I couldn't remember things, and he had to repeat questions and redo the tests as the major stroke left my mental processes so confused. I failed the test miserably and felt so ashamed at my poor ability to do better--but in the long run--it was a big plus in getting my disability on the first try, doing the whole process myself {no lawyer or other assistance).

    Then every month after that I had 4 more exams: a memory test, an eye exam, a visual field eye exam, and the last was to see an orthopedist regarding my back problems. SSA gave no credence to my having FM/CFS, but as the orthopedist examined me, ordered a quick set of his own x-rays, and poked and prodded on me--he did note the FM/CFS.

    Like you, I kept honest and true to myself maintaining my integrity. And, I admire you for maintaining yours. These doctors & specialists hired and paid by the SSA to give the exams usually have enough experience to spot exaggerations and extended dramas in a person trying to get on disability.So maintaining your honesty and integrity shows your character and what kind of person you are--even if it gets you denied disability. I'm proud of you!

    That last exam was in May/05, and on May 28/05, I received my Letter of Award for 100% disability. I discovered through their 4-page Award Letter that they had decided I was disabled by December/04. The exams were to determine the percentage of award disability because they can give you anywhere from 10% to 100% disability. Within a week of my Award Letter, they sent me my retro monies.

    Stay true to yourself, but also remember to answer questions on what you feel like on your WORST days--leaving nothing out.

    I also put my Faith & Trust in God.

    I wish you the Best and hope you get your disability. Blessings, Carol....
  3. silky17

    silky17 New Member

    Thank you for the kind words and feedback. I could not live with myself if I chose to be deceitful in anyway. Like Toby says either way I will probably get denied.

    So honesty is the best policy. I couldn't beleive though I had such clarity. :(

    To catgal..........You have been through way more than me and my heart goes out to you. Thank you for taking the time and energy to write to me. I myself have feared having a stroke and I am sorry for you. You do sound like a strong woman, hang in there kiddo. and may God bless you.

    Hanginthere.......I feel the same way about committing to work. Like I told the phycologist, I don't feel like I can work a 40 hour work week now. I take my job to seriously when I am there and I would keep pushing myself and eventually do myself in for the next 3 days.

    I told him that I usually got in two good days and then I was out for the next 3. How does a person work like that with people who "have" to be made to be there, 50 and 60 hours? I have a hard time with that.

    The doctor did ask me if my stress level has decreased since I had'nt been working. I said oh yes it has. So I am baffled to what will happen. But I bet two dollars to a hole in a donut I get "DENIED"

    I am keeping the Faith.
    God bless you all

    [This Message was Edited on 08/16/2005]

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