Have you ever been showed true compassion???

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by Asatrump, Jul 6, 2006.

  1. Asatrump

    Asatrump New Member

    I was replying to a post regarding prayers for our Mari. It made me recall the time a physician called me on Mother's day to inform me my test results were ok, and he wished me Happy Mother's day.

    I think I was so shocked I barely uttered a word other than thank you. A simple gesture from him, sixty seonds of his time. A good doctor but a better "person".

    How many people have showed you true understanding and compassion? I would be interested if you have time to share a story.

    One particular minister I worked for would often face me. He would take one of my hands between both of his hands and say: how are you? But he said it in such a genuine and loving way, and was prepared to stand there and wait for me to reply. I think tears came to my eyes each time he did that, because I felt true compassion. How often we run into people who say "how are you?" but they don't really want to know, it is merely a phrase of greeting.

    I try and say to people, hi, I am glad to see you.

    Probably only on personal email do I ask the question, "how are you?". Then I have a chance to reply and explain. Without this personal support that I receive through my email, my life would be much more difficult. Much.

    My doctors perhaps know my name , or my fms. Their schedules and insurance companies leave no time for compassion or putting us at ease. They ripple words off their tongue: " try to avoid stress." Merely the act of being in that cubicle causes me stress. They are expected to see X number of patients per hour. I get the feeling they can't wait to get rid of me and get the next body in the exam room.

    I feel like I should merely be lying on some assembly line table and maybe a nut or bolt should be added or removed.

    My last visit he had a new toy, a laptop with a stylus. So now, not only does he never touch me, he never looks at me either, just pointing to whatever on his screen. I feel why should I be there, I could phone "it" in. Plus his nurse, (yet another new one) took my bp three times and next day my arm muscle was totally sore.

    I find that life in general does not offer compassion. I try not to bring up my aches and pains, because other people have their own. I don't talk about how I feel with my own family, as they merely want wife or mom, not a list of complaints.

    Likely I should have posted this as OT on the other message board, but I feel this smaller group pulls together and it makes me feel good.
  2. caffey

    caffey New Member

    I have been so sick this past 11/2 years in and out of hospital. I would call my girlfriend and she would take me to hospital and sit with me for hours or if she wasn't home she would come to the hospital at all hours to see how I was and then contact everyone. She would go to my place and feed my cat and stay with her clean my condo and make sure I had food when I came home. I could write a book on all that she has done for me. I am so blessed. She has never asked for anything in return.
  3. Asatrump

    Asatrump New Member

    What a wonderful blessing to have such a friend. Thank you for sharing with me.
  4. gumbi

    gumbi New Member

    Hi asatrump,
    Over 21 years ago,I became very ill when I lived in Zululand South Africa. I received wonderful support from my wife. She was expecting our second son at the time and I do not know how she coped, but cope she did and 11 years ago I kind of managed to support her in a similar manner when she was rushed into hospital for radical surgery to halt her cervical cancer. I am glad to say she is fit and healthy now.
    That can be explained as love for each other but there are a few other wonderful things that happened from other people which I will always remember, such as the elderly neighbour who came several times to my house with a silver tray, tea and biscuits for my wife when I was away in hospital. This gesture really did help my wife keep her spirits up.
    After being in three different hospitals in various places in South Africa, over a period of six months and not getting any better, We decided to return to scotland to be close to my wife's family as things were not looking very good for me, my assistant from work, who being a genuine zulu and was being paid poverty wages (as was the way for natives to be treated at the time), offered me 5 rand to try to help me out financially. This act of generosity will always be remembered fondly by me.
    and finally, when I was in hospital in Durban, there was the Irish matron who spoke to me when I was running a very high fever, simply said "god bless you"
    All of the above are treasured true understanding and compassionate selfless acts which I will forever hold dearly.
  5. MamaR

    MamaR New Member

    You are such a blessing to us. You are truly a compassionate person..that we can truly feel.
    I appreciate you... and the many others on here that are so caring and compassionate. I don't know what I ever did without you all.

    I, like you have had a wonderful pastor that cared for me, but, he is deceased now and I truly miss him. There are many others that try so hard to understand me, but they can't know where I am with these illnesses. But, so thankful that they try.

    I agree that the medical field is only getting worse. After yesterday's experience...I am so exhausted.

    I sometimes just stand back and wonder...why am I even here? Like you said...we feel like we are on a assembly line. I leave the office feeling almost dizzy from how fast they pass you through. And, how they make our sensory nerves so irritated! The nurse comes in in such a hurry that she makes me so nervous. On my last two visits, she was out of breath because she was rushing so much.

    What are we to do?

    God bless you....Mari
  6. Asatrump

    Asatrump New Member

    Oh Gumbi, thank you for sharing your stories of compassion you received. Such blessings and memories. Wonderful to hear.

    Mari, yes it seems less compassion and more assembly line medicine. With the insurance companies I am not sure there is a way to get back to caring physicians who listen with their ears and not their mouths. We are just $$ in their pocket. It feels like that .

    Wake me up, I have found the world is made up of givers and takers. The problem is there are very few givers and far more takers. You show the real meaning of compassion. I believe that some of us come across as being very strong and self sufficient. People do not seem to recognize we also need the love and support. It is very draining .

    Thank you for sharing a bit of your time and your life with me.

    The biggest gift we can give to another human being is to listen. With our ears and our hearts.

    God bless each one .
  7. Asatrump

    Asatrump New Member

    Well said my friend. Well said. Picture a fat old lady with gray hair attempting to do a cheer leading routine!!

    Great words of wisdome for us all. Thank you .