Hello, Okay so a quick recap, I have been sick for a couple of years. I was pretty thin, kept myself up, had a job, went to the gym and just was overall a pretty outgoing individual. Well since getting sick I have slowly shut myself in day by day, week by week and month by month. It started out small. I quit working out, quit my job, started declining invitations to go out, stopped wanting to go on dates with my husband and then just got to the point where it was hard for me to even go to the grocery store. Well since my son was born I have decided that no matter how bad I feel I need to get out because I don't want him to grow up in isolation. BUT...I am SO extremely self conscious of myself that it is hard to go anywhere!!! I try everything I can to keep from going anywhere. I make up excuse after excuse. The thought of actually joining a "mommy group" terrifies me. In my head they are going to take one look at me and judge me. I just feel like I don't have anything to offer. Does that make sense? My husband took me to Old Navy about two weeks ago and I about had an anxiety attack right there in the store. I kept it together by just not speaking. When we got home I went into the bathroom and just cried and cried. I don't know WHY in the world I have become so self conscious. Well I mean I do know. It is because I essentially took myself out of society for a few years. I just feel so overwhelmed when I go out. I am self conscious about my hair, my body (pregnancy weight) my clothes, the way they fit, the way I walk, EVERYTHING about me I have become so timid. I rarely look people in the eye anymore because I feel so afraid. I really used to be a very outgoing person! Now I am like a wounded animal or something and it makes me sick! I am trying to force myself out. I take my son for a walk just about everyday up and down our street and the entire time we walk I fear someone coming up and talking to us. This is so ridiculous and I just wanted to know if anyone else was going through this? Thanks for reading. ((HUGS)) kate P.S. And if women today didn't have it bad enough... On my homepage I have a bunch of daily stuff that comes up and one of them is the daily "How To's" by WikiHow and today's subject...DRUMROLL...How to look like a Model. COME ON! Seriously. It is an entire aritcle on what to do to look like a model. It even goes as far as to saying that you should always smile because that is what models do because they are such happy and beautiful people. (don't quote me on that last part but that is essentially what it said) Anyway, how in the world is someone supposed to feel good about themselves when there is crap like that all around us. Okay sorry, had to get that out!