Having Children

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by KK027, Nov 2, 2002.

  1. KK027

    KK027 New Member

    First of all, I would like to say how much that reading all of your posts and responses have helped me try to deal with my illness of cfs/fm.
    Thank you!

    I do however have a question...

    I currently do not have any children, but I have read that it is not safe for women, with our illness, to have children. (???) Because it could cause physical/neurological problems in the child.

    Does anyone have any information on this?

    I am just curious, because if there is some truth to this, I really need to do some re-evaluating in my life.

    I really want to have children. But I will not put a child through anything that I could have prevented beforehand.

    Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

    Thank you,
    KK027
  2. KK027

    KK027 New Member

    First of all, I would like to say how much that reading all of your posts and responses have helped me try to deal with my illness of cfs/fm.
    Thank you!

    I do however have a question...

    I currently do not have any children, but I have read that it is not safe for women, with our illness, to have children. (???) Because it could cause physical/neurological problems in the child.

    Does anyone have any information on this?

    I am just curious, because if there is some truth to this, I really need to do some re-evaluating in my life.

    I really want to have children. But I will not put a child through anything that I could have prevented beforehand.

    Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

    Thank you,
    KK027
  3. mistyb

    mistyb New Member

    I have not seen any literature that indicates a definite cause of harm to our children. There are people that have children, or siblings that have the disease. My doctor told me to not let this disease make my decision. I had two children before I was diagnosed, and am currently trying for a third. We have had definite difficulty conceiving number 3. Doctor told us to wait another six months before they do any testing.

    There are several others on this board who have had children while having this diagnosis.

    good luck.

    misty
  4. Hippo

    Hippo New Member

    while I have been sick. They are fine.

    Hippo
  5. LilSis

    LilSis New Member

    Hi kk027.
    For numerous reasons, I was told I could never have children. My husband & I had already sent applications for Visas & some other things to adopt a child from Romania.
    In the meantime, my rheumy suggested to give it a try. So...I came off most of meds for 120 days before we could start trying. That was pretty awful. Amzingly, I was pregnant in about 3 weeks! What is really wild is none of the information about adopting never showed up!
    My RA went into almost complete remission, only had 2 (really bad) flares. But, it kicked my FMS/MPS into overdrive. Regardless, I had a full term baby boy weighing in @ 8lbs/4 ozs. He was absolutely perfect. Now he is 4 years old - 1/2 Taz & 1/2 Dennis the Menace. Fortuantely, he is too cute to beat (just kidding).
    However, I will not have any more. I have a much higher level of respect for single parents, parents of mutilple children and especially those that have any kind of chronic illnesses. I am not worthy!!! :->
    I am only 31, but I just do not feel I could be a quality mother to more than one child. Particullary since he is so high maintenance.
    I will say this, if you keep finding reason to put it off, like until you're "financially stable" or in a "better state of mind", it will never happen. You just have to decide and follow thru with it. My personal opinion is that things happens in God's time frame & he makes no mistakes.
    Blessings,
    LilSis
  6. allhart

    allhart New Member

    i have 4 nautral children my oldest has health promblems but it has nothing to do with mine all my other are perfectly healthy i just had my last one in march,
  7. Rene

    Rene New Member

    I what children too. FOSTER children cause there is no way I can handle a child under 6. You may want to read the post under foster parent by me Rene cause its 50% for it or against it. People really don't want me to do it though its really in me to do it.
    Good Luck
    Rene
  8. Sandyz

    Sandyz New Member

    I have two and they are both as healthy and happy as can be.
    I have two boys- an 11 yr. old and a 6 yr old.

    My pregnancys went fine and they were very healthy babies and I`ve had Fm for close to 15 years.
    [This Message was Edited on 11/02/2002]
  9. klutzo

    klutzo New Member

    So far is showing that this is an autosomal dominant disease. That means if you have a female child, there is a 50% chance that she will develop it at some point in her life. I would not do this to my worst enemy. There are so many unwanted children in the world who need love.
    Just my opinion and will no doubt tick many people off.
    Klutzo
  10. Madelyn

    Madelyn New Member

    I have six children. Four of them were after I had CfIDS. They are all perfectly healthy. During the last(I was 39), I had almost total remission, and as long as I nursed her. The pregnancy before that was awful. I was ill for nine months. The other two were normal pregnancies but I felt some mild symptoms. My kids are healthier than their friends. Go for it! It's incalculably worth it!! Bearing and carrying children is always a sacrifice, and a risk--for anyone. It's a noble thing that you will be so glad that you did.
    I have never heard of anyone passing this on to a child.
  11. amymb74

    amymb74 New Member

    I had cfids for over a year before getting pregnant. My first pregnancy was ok, got a little worse after giving birth but bounced back - my 2nd pregnancy was fine but my health went way downhill after I stopped breastfeeding. Never bounced back and would not even consider having another because I cannot risk the little health I do have left. My children are both boys - 7 & 4 - perfectly healthy. Just my opinion but I have read numerous studies that cfids does not affect having a healthy baby. My children are not only healthy, they are both very smart. You're very smart to give this important decision a lot of thought. I wish you the best..AMY
  12. teach6

    teach6 New Member

    They have their various and sundry health problems, but so far nothing resembling mine. I have gradual onset CFS and more recent onset, probably due to very high stress levels, FM. Since I'm not really certain when my CFS began it's hard to say if I had it before or after having my kids. There are a few things that make me think before, but more point to after.

    I have one daughter and two sons. All are intelligent, contributing members of society. One son is a teacher, the other is trying to figure out what you do with a fine arts degree in painting. He is beginning to get some ideas, so that's a step in the right direction. My youngest is a junior in college and this week is thinking about law school. We'll see what next week brings!

    As your children grow older you discover that none of them is perfect, and noe has perfect health. Some of their health problems could have been predicted, asthma and allergies, since their dad has them, needed braces since my teeth were a mess. But some things show up as a big surprise, like congenital hearing loss, mental illness.

    There are no guarantees on our children's health, but as parents we love them, warts and all. One thing my ex and I agree on is that the best thing to come out of our 25 year marriage was our three wonderful children!

    Barbara
  13. azcrum

    azcrum New Member

    for all the support we all get from one another. I think it's a great place and it beats watching TV alone on a saturday night. I have two kids. I also beleive I have had FMS way before I had my kids. They are 5 and 7. They are fine. I have never heard of anything you have mentioned so I wouldn't worry about it. Good luck.