Hello. I am a 30 year old female from Wisconsin. I have just recently discovered these messages boards and I thank God for them! I have struggled with depression off and on (more on than off) for the past 15 years. I'm not just talking a week or two. I'm talking for periods of anywhere from 2 months to a year. It's definitely been a struggle. I prayed to accept Christ as my Savior when I was 16. But I didn't really understand what it meant or what was involved in following Christ. To make a long story short, in April of 2004, through an incredibly series of events, I came to realize that I was deceived and not truly a Christian. I still struggle with depression and often feel like a failure as a Christian because of it. I discovered the Depression board a couple of days it ago and it is nice to finally have some support and a place where you can vent and not be judged. It's nice to be understoood. Depression can make you feel so isolated and alone. My financial situation is extremely tight right now. But the non-denomination church I attend offers free counseling. I have had the number forever and haven't been able to make the call. I really feel like God has been stripping me of my pride and taking away all the things I trust in more than Him. It's been scary and really hard, but I know it's something that needs to happen. I'm also seriously thinking about talking to my doctor about going on meds. The last couple of weeks have been especially tough because my unemployment ran out and I have very little money coming in. Please pray that I would find a job very soon and I that I would continue to trust Him in the meantime. I know that God will get me through.