Hello Rene

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Busyknitter2, Oct 9, 2007.

  1. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    I decided to start a new post. The other one was getting very long.

    Alexis seems to be getting better. Alan said today that she must be getting better because she was getting her attitude back. We tease and say she is 4 going on 14.

    Andrea said Sunday when we took Alexis home that Draven was getting what Alexis has. It really upset Alexis. She took him to the Dr. yesterday and the only thing wrong with him is the fever from cutting both of his front teeth at the same time.

    I am having a really down day. I thing everything has set in. I could not sleep last night because I kept seeing Daddy's face when I went back in his hospital room. The vacant stare and no response. I do not plan to have much if anything to do with my brother. I got a bill today from Daddy's bills and it was addressed to the estate and they want to make a settlement. They can want all they want to.

    In answer to your question. I am still working on some things. I know it sounds goofy but Daddy had an ink pen that he had for years and always used it to write checks or sign anything I took it. I have things from Momma. I decided that I do not want the china cabinet I really do not have room for it and the china is gone.

    I hope that todays visit goes well with your Mom. Do you make fresh yams or canned? I know it is hard but you need to get some rest for yourself.

    I need to clean the spare room so will go. Take care of yourself and get some rest.

    God bless; Pam
  2. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam, sorry your having a down day. You've been doing really good but of course you miss your dad. I don't know what to say. That would be so hard to see his face. Oh I think that pen is the best gift for you that he had. You will see him again for sure.

    My mom is in pain pretty bad. I told the rn and then will call again to the second shift when the 2nd rn who is not on the rn registry to help.

    The dr cut her meds more then I wanted. Though the only good thing is she is not overdosed anymore like she was.

    My neighbor wrote me back and said he saw my brother at wal mart (which is 3 blocks) but not at the house. I don't know if I believe that. I bet anything hes in the shed like hes been for the past 7 yrs.

    Well I hope Alexis has a good school year. If you get to go on field trips with them that would be so fun.

    Oh I just make the yams from the can with the sugar and marshmello. My mom isn't picky and I don't have the energy! She loves them and Alice does too.

    Snuggles just ate so hes getting better.

    Take care of yourself.
  3. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    I am sorry to hear that you Mom is in so much pain. Is it possible to give her something for the pain without doping her up to much? Where the rns helpful when you called them? It seems like some are and some arn't where ever you go.

    I don't remember if I told you or not but when Daddy was in ICU one of his alarms went off and Bill went to the door of his room. There was a nurse standing at a station right out side of his room. She looked at Bill and said I hear the alarm but my post stops at this station. Bill got mad and said "so if a patient dies bcause it is not your room that is ok? There was another time that a nurse from there came in and checked Daddy because an alarm was going off. It depends on the person.

    Alexis has pictures at school today. Her Daddy took her to school and I am going to pick her up. I bought her a new dress. It made me mad Alan took it home and Andrea said it wasn't cute enough.

    I think she is mad because I won't agree to pay 50% of Draven's birthday party. Out of 70 people 18 would be from our side. If we weren't paying all of their other bills. She doesn't see that tho. I told Alan if they wanted to split the party up I would take care of our side.
    Draven is only 1. Give him a piece of chocalate cake and a few presents, take a few pictures and he is happy. I think she wants to have the party for her not Draven.

    I am feeling a little better today. I think the numbness wore off and everything hit me at once.

    I hope you are getting rest as you can. Take care and let me know how things are going.

    God bless; Pam
  4. Rene

    Rene New Member

    HI Pam, I agree with you about the party. You are already providing them a place to live and always help out. There is no rule that you have to pay for the party.

    She maybe should get a job since Alan can't. She can't have everything.

    That wasn't nice of her to say about the dress either.

    I only like some of my moms RNS. I didn't know that RNS don't have their degrees. SOme do but they make the same pay no matter what.

    I went in to feed her today. She was better today then yesterday. Her lens is missing from her glasses. So we have to get her some new ones. The dr will come in on the 30TH

    My neighbor who seems really nice but she doesn't speak english as I think she is from Afganistan, knocked on my door and gave me a complete dinner.

    That was so nice of her. She is older and her grandkids who are in their 20s speak english. They are nice people. I live in a really super nice apt that charges half price in half of the apts. I only pey $380 and in CA that is cheap.

    Well guess I go for now.

    Take care,
  5. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    I am glad that your Mom was doing better today. Do you know what happened to her lense in her glasses? I hope that she continues to do better.

    That was very sweet of your neighbor to bring you a meal. You are right that is cheap rent any where. My Daddy paid $645 and that included his electricity.

    Alan has a few chances at a job and he went to a temp service today and they told him to come back Monday. I hope he will find something soon.

    Andrea has every excuse to not look for a job. With her spina bifida she could probably get disability but she told me it quit when she turned 18. We have thought for a long time that her Mom is still getting her disability check. She sure did not want Andrea to change her address when she moved out.

    Andrea can work she is not as bad off as so many others She would rather sleep and sit on the couch. She told me the other day that she cleaned for 12 hours. The place looked ok but it should have been spotless if she cleaned for two days. Of course my guys tell me I am a neat freak.

    I picked up Alexis from school. She is back to her old self. We came home and had tuna sandwiches and cream of brocolli soup. She laid down and took a good nap and when she got up we planted a few seeds in her flower pot, read a story, and just had fun. I promised her she could spend the night with me tomorrow night and I would take her to school.

    I am going to go relax for a while. Take care and let me know how things are.

    God bless; Pam
  6. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam, how are you? Glad Alexis is doing good. Hope the job work out with Alan. I don;t really know what spina diffada is. I would think she would get disability.

    That sounds like a nice day with Alexis you had. Are you gonna take her costume shopping? I would love to do that.

    Well my mom isn't doing so well just in pain. I finally called the supervisor and told her my mom isn't getting her meds at the right time. I can't go into all the mistake the rn are doing. Not dangerous though but bad enough.

    The supervisor brushed it off and defended everything. I swear you get better customer service at a fast food chain.

    My mom wants me back tonight but I don't think I can do it. The orth dr never showed up to see her. It was to be mon or tues.

    The only good thing is I called this old man Andy in our room and he can't really talk but he just smiled and smiled. He likes me and snuggles.

    Well take care and sorry for going on like I do- I think I'm PMS too!

  7. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    You did not go on. I am just glad that we can talk to each other. I am so sorry that your Mom is in pain and they can not seem to give her the meds as they should. I do not understand why people go into that line of work when they really don't like it or want to do the job right.

    A friend's husband was operated on for cancer of the jaw yesterday. The tumor was the size of a small tennis ball and the cancer is not very bad at all, they caught it early. I guess the male nurse he had last night came in and told him he had to take a pill. He had taken it that morning, it was for his blood pressure. I guess the guy kept coming in during the night saying you need to take this or that. Luckily he only had to stay overnight.

    I have Alexis tonight so I can take her to preK. We had dinner and made jello jigglers. We had a really good time.

    I went thru pictures today and sent some to relatives, I also wrote the bank about the car. It won't do any good but it made me feel a little better.

    I hope that the ortho Dr. shows up to see your Mom. You are so wonderful to be so freindly and helpful with the people in the NH. I am sure that alot of them do not have many visitors.

    Take care and let me know how things are going.

    God bless; Pam
  8. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam, oh I still wide awake so thought I'd write. Yea I think nurse who work overnight need stuff to do so the do it at night. The dr is starting my mom on Lidocane for her elbow. They are giving it to her at midnight!

    Do you know what lidocane is? I just read up on it.

    When I was talking to the supervisor today the brand new social worker (usually most are super nice) at noon blurted out "your mom was in good spirts this morning when I saw her" WE were talking about pain meds.

    One rn told me "everyone says my mom does better when I'm not there." That rn was on registry. That isn't true as I've never been there when she pulled out a cath.

    That is good you wrote the bank. I googled deceased parents bills and they had some good info.

    When is Dravens birthday? What are you up to this weekend? We are going to have a cool rainy day tomorrow. Guess its that time. Good thing we don't move the clocks back til november.

    I wanted to ask how you learned to knit? I'd like to do that.

    Well I'll go for now.
  9. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    I can not believe that the nurse said that your Mom does better when you are not there. Your right she doesn't pull out her cath when you are there. When you are not there they do not know what or how she is doing because they are not in there. Medical people kill me.

    I learned how to knit when I was 7 years old. I was in girl scounts. My Momma taught me how to do it as I was having troble doing it the way they where teaching in scouts. Do you know that is the one and only time I saw my Momma with knitting needles in her hands. I fell in love with it and she hated to do it.

    I have checked into the bills to. They can not make me pay anything that he owed unless it was in my name also. I don't have my name on anything. The reason they could take the car was because it was collatral. As Bill said these compnies are going to try and get their money.

    What is that medience that they are going to give your Mom for her elbow? Is it for pain?

    We are suppose to have a very cool weekend. It was 92 the first of the week and now the high will be lucky to hit 60.

    Take care and get some rest.

    God bless; Pam
  10. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam how are you? I may one day start knitting too. I would love to knitt my mom a throw. That would probable take forever.

    You're right about the bill. Though I did read they can come after the estate. With the car though I don't know if they can come after you if it goes to auction for the balance. I read they can come after the estate. I I don't know if they can come after life ins.

    Yea that nurse even said go ask others that my mom does better when I'm not there! That nurse has only been there like once a month! I have asked others if my mom is ever content and they said not really but sometimes shes ok.

    We didn't even hit 60 yesterday and it rained! Today and the rest of the week it will be in the 70's.

    I am gonna get me something a bath and body works as they gave me a coupon if I spend $10 I get something worth up to $11 free!

    That ortho dr never came in to see my mom like they said. I am angry. This was a Methodist hospital dr.

    We could have gone to UC Davis last thurday but chose methodist as we'd have to see THREE different drs for her elbow,hand and shoulder!!!!!!! I am not kidding.

    Well hope you have an good weekend.
    Take care,
  11. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    How are things going? It was a crazy weekend. I felt awful all weekend, and Bill didn't get in until Saturday around 11. We had ordered Alexis a new bed and me a chair and had to go get them. I will say that the bed sat up quickly. Alexis was so excited.

    We than came home and put my chair togather than Andy and his partner came out and they loaded the love seat up and we hauled it to their house.

    I felt bad because I slept on and off all day Sunday and it was the only day Bill was home all day. We had a nice dinner and evening though.

    I still can not believe the nurses saying that your Mom does better when you are not there. It almost sounds like they don't want you there as much because you see what is going on. They don't have to be on their toes as much and can let a patient just lay and not worry about them. You are so right to keep the eye on them that you do.

    Bill tells me not to worry about the car. I feel like they will sure let me know if it sells for under what was owed but they will not notify anybody if it sells for over what is owed. Daddy got a bill from the Visa saying his payment is overdue and it says $900 is owed I am almost postive that was the balance when we went in there the day after the funeral. If that is the case where did the $500 go? I will find out.

    I would be so mad at the ortho Dr. These Drs. just don't care anymore there are a few that do but they are few and far between.

    It is suppose to be up to 80 here again today. I am cleaning so will talk to you later. Take care and let me know how things are.

    God bless: Pam
  12. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam, I'm glad you were able to at least get the bed and chair this weekend. You needed the sleep so you take it when you can get it you have been through a lot and don't need to get even sicker then you are.

    I'm not sure that the bank can get the money from you. Maybe the life ins co would know.

    I called the orth dr today but they but me on hold-i'll call them later.

    I only like two of the rns and they are perm. RNs not registry RNs. The RNs are only in the room maybe 5 min if that twice a day to give my mom meds. They don't have time to hang around. They have 25 patients for one RN!!!!

    Where is BIll off to now? Sorry you weren't doing so good when he was home. That was nice of you to give the couch to Andy.

    Well I'm getting ready to go to the NH but I can't stay long.

    Take care,
  13. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    How is your Mom today. Man 25 patients per RN that is an awful lot. What do they do if a patient has more needs? It is wonderful that you can be there as often as you are with your Mom.

    I started feeling better today but I am going down hill again. Alan and Alexis came over and we went to Taco Bell for dinner and watched Raw (wrestling). It was fun but I am glad they have left so I can relax and get ready to go to bed.

    Daddy got a thing in the mail today from the insurance company that says they would not pay for charges on July 24 for Home Health Care. I don't blame them as he passed away on the 20th.

    I am beat so I am going to get ready for bed. I hope you are getting some rest. Thank you for the kind things you said.

    God bless; Pam
  14. Rene

    Rene New Member

    HI Pam how are you? Glad you get the house to yourself to get some much needed rest. How do you like your new chair?

    My mom was sorta doing good yesterday. She went to physical therapy for 5 min. It only lasts 5 min but that is better then nothing.

    I called that ortho dr office and told them that they were wrong in what that did. She apologized that the dr didn't call last week.

    Yea the rns have 25 patients. But like Tim, the 41 yr old with Huntingtons, doesn't ever need a rn cause he doesn't take meds. The aids have 7 patients which is one less then the law allows. They are busy.

    Well looks like fall is here. We had rain and its gonna rain the rest of the week. I've been home all day as I don't feel good. Did you see Oprah today? It was good.

    I may go see my mom for a few min but I'm so tired. I'll call her again as she is soooo miserable.

    Well guess I'll call her.

    Take care,
  15. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    I love my new chair. Alexis loves it too. She informed me that it is mine and her chair. I kept her tonight. Andrea's Dad won tickets to the Pacer game and they went so I kept her all night. We had a good time.

    I got a copy of the Visa bill today from Daddy's bank. It does show where they took the money out of his account and put it towards the Visa bill. It also shows where the last month of Daddy's pension was deposited and they also put that toward the Visa bill. His pension check was direct deposited. Between the two of those it would have paid the car off. I do not understand how they could decide where that money was suppose to go. The car was the only thing that could be considered collateral.

    How was your Mom today. Did the ortho Dr. ever get back with you? I hope that you feel better and got some good rest.

    It is late so I will talk to you later.

    God bless; Pam
  16. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam how are you? Glad you like your new chair. HOpe the kids had a good time at the game.

    I'm glad you told me about what the bank did to your dads account. I just wrote a check as my mom owes me $2500 and she only had about $500 left. Her credit cards are about $3300. I don't want them to take it as she said I can have it as she owes it to me.

    SO Bud never did come up with the money for the car? I wonder how the back could do that with the money. You would of had the car. Who knows though he may not have kept up the ins, and car maintained ect and wrecked it

    I am gonna have to pay for her homeowners ins in a few
    months and for cremation. If I don't pay the homeowners they repo the house.

    Saw my mom yesterday and she was saying her back hurt over and over. I am glad that she isn't so drugged up. I don't worry of her dying from being overdoesed as I did.

    I wonder if she hurts as bad as its always her elbow and she didn't mention her elbow like she does. I still feel sorry for her.

    This week has flew by so fast. Have you been getting crafts and such from Alexis from school?

    Chloe will come today so that is good. I'm not doing so good.

    Take care,
    [This Message was Edited on 10/18/2007]
  17. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    I changed the picture on my profile to one of Alexis and Daddy.

    I hope you are feeling better. I am not feeling well, it has been one of those weeks.

    I found out last night that a friend's husband has cancer in his jaw. They took out a tumor the size of a small tennnis ball and said it looked good, when they cut it open it was an active cancer. He had to go back in today and they are taking out the lymph nodes. He will have to take 5 days a week of radiation for 5 weeks. She feels bad because they thought he was only having his stitches out and she went to work so he got the news by himself.

    This birthday party for Draven is going to extremes. They are mad because we won't help pay or it. Andrea's 8 year old niece asked Alan why we would not help pay for the party. He told her because we where paying for him a place to live and food, etc. It goes to show that she has heard them griping about it.

    How is your Mom's pain, what are they giving her for it now. Did that ortho Dr. ever bother to get back with you? How is she doing on the food.

    I am glad that you took care of your Mom's account. You have to pay for the creamation before?

    No Bud neve did a thing about the car. I got a dun for Daddy today on the car and one for the Visa yesterday.

    I see all of Alexis' papers from preK some of them I keep and some I send home. There are times when she will say Nana that is for you.

    She had me in tears yesterday. I laid her down for a rest and reached down and hugged her and she said "Nana I want you to be my real Mommy" and started tearing up and said "I don't want you to be my grandmommy I want you to be my real Mommy." That sweet little angel

    Well I have went on long enough. Let me know how things are going. take care.

    God bless; Pam
  18. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam, how are you? Hope better. Is your friends husband gonna be ok? Do you know what stage its in? The dr should have let him know ASAP about the cancer. I doubt the dr found out exactly the time he came to his appt.

    No that dr never called. I can't believe it. He has a super nice brand new office. Its very fancy.

    I can't believe they are expecting you to pay for the party. I have never heard of that. She should have just a cake. What is it that she wants at the party? What do you do at a 1 yr old party anyway?

    what is a dun on the car?

    Well I saw my mom last night and brought her yams. I will say she loves that and her pudding. The whole time she commanded and went on and on. My pillow my pillow like 20 times, (meaning adjust it) then something else over and over.

    Then shes yelling over and over for the aid. I told her don;t do that that. I'm helping her and hes busy feeding tim. She wouldn't stop.

    I was gonna go tonight but I can't. I;m to tired. I was only out for 20 min today.

    I am glad she isn't sedated so bad but she needs to be calmed down some. I feel so bad for her. Today she pulled out her cathator again. I asked he why she said she didn't know.

    I feel so bad for her. SHe is so miserable except for pudding and yams. I wish I could make her happy. I've been trying to do that my whole life.

    Alice asked me yesterday if she could go home with me. She is always pleasant. I told her I wish. SHe is 95. Her daughter is in LA 7 hrs away. I don't know how people can throw there mom in a home and hardly go see them. You need to be there.

    Well that is sad about Alexis. You could tell her you are the mother but your the GRANDmother. The mother of all mothers. Does she mention her bio mom?

    Well I'm gonna call my mom see how she is.
    Take care,

  19. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    I still feel awful. I may have to break down and go to the Dr. in a day or two.

    I did tell Alexis that I am her Grandmommy but she said she don't want me to be that she wants me to be her real Mommy. She does not mention her egg donor. She was looking at pictures here a while back and said that is my old Mommy, I don't remember her holding me. It breaks my heart.

    She wants all kind of games, decorations and a great big show. He is one, I beat all of the people are going to over whelm him. We must put on a show though.

    Is there something that they can give your Mom to calm her down a little bit without doping her up? You have done every thing that a daughter could possible do for your Mother. In her right mind she know this. You are with her as much as you possible can be and do all that you can to make sure that she gets the care she needs.

    I just talked to my friend and the Dr. said that the nodes looked good but they won't know for sure until they get the pathology report back.

    The dun meant that I got a past due statement or I should say that Daddy did. I have not heard a word from my brother, it will be two weeks tomorrow.

    I have a couple of things to do before I go to bed so I will talk to you later. Take care of yourself and get some rest.

    God bless; Pam
  20. Rene

    Rene New Member

    Hi Pam how are you today? Hope you don't have to go to the hospital. Thanks for posting the picture of your dad and Alexis. Is that at his place? How long ago was that picture taken? That is a nice picture. He looks content and she looks carefree and happy.

    I'm glad your friends dads nodes are good-that is important. My neighbors dad who is 94 died. We just talk a little bit. I offered to take her to the airport as he lived in LA.

    My mom is miserable as always. I just called her. I will be there but I'm not so good. I won't stay but to feed her the yams.

    I want to get her some sedative though she is on ativan. I'm scared the dr will give her to much as he does what he wants.

    Is Bill home now? Hope he can take care of you. You have been through so much thats for sure.

    I'm gonna eat and get in the shower and get ready to go see my mom.

    Hope you are feeling better.