Help Wikipedia to define CFS

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by wildworld, Nov 14, 2006.

  1. wildworld

    wildworld New Member

    I can't sleep, so I'm entertaining myself by editing Wikipedia's entry on CFS. I added the following paragraph:

    As more is becoming known about the illness, many sufferers and doctors familiar with the complexity of the illness and its wide range of symptoms have launched a "Campaign for a Fair Name" due to the stigma which is sometimes attached to the term 'Chronic Fatigue Syndrome'. The campaign seeks to establish a name that reflects the debilitating and often painful nature of this long-term disease.

    Feel free to adjust.
    [This Message was Edited on 11/15/2006]
  2. Gothbubbles

    Gothbubbles New Member

    that's really well written
  3. kholmes

    kholmes New Member

    Isn't it neat that you can make additions to Wikipedia entries? A while back, I wrote an entry on the French mountain climber, Lionel Terray, just for fun.

    Some suggestions (from a former English teacher):

    For future readers, you might add the year in which the campaign was launched.

    Add a comma right after "term."

    Use the double quotation marks around "Chronic Fatigue Syndrome."

    The period goes inside the quotation marks.

    You might also add the words "more accurate" before "name that reflects..."

    Lastly, I'm not sure "often" is necessary before "painful," since it's unlikely that there is anyone with CFS without pain of some sort.

    Don't mean to be so nitpicky.

    Good for you for your addition! How about another paragraph on the CDC's public awareness campagin and their acknowledging that CFS is real illness?

    [This Message was Edited on 11/15/2006]
  4. Geegafer

    Geegafer New Member

    Yeah, Wildworld!

    You did a wonderful service.

  5. wildworld

    wildworld New Member

    you seem to have some thoughts. go back to the wikipedia page and put your edits in, It would be interesting to see what our readers could come up with that could improve it's entry in wikipedia

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