Hit Low Point...

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by susabar, Oct 28, 2005.

  1. susabar

    susabar New Member

    Dear friends,
    Some of this is FM related.... of course that shadows everything in our lives. I've been sick for a few years now, I swear living with the stress of my Bi-polar / substance abusing husband drove me over the brink. He's been out of the house for one year now since I had no choice but to "intervene". I have a court order that's good until June of 06 to keep him away. I can't tell you how difficult I'ts been to be the sole provider, paying all the bills, being a single parent of a 12 year old., working full-time at a highly stressful job. And now I think my husband and his father are going to try to put me and our daughter out on the street. ( These people are wealthy and money has always come first ) Work has gotten impossible and I've been in a flare for the last three weeks. My life has been a living nightmare. I know I have blessings like the ability to work ( really NO CHOICE ) is more like it, but I am having trouble even taking. " One day at a time".
    Thanks for listening... Oh P.S. I have one really un-supportive co-worker and when I went to my FM doc this week he said I should be grateful I've had 40 good years !!
  2. stinker56

    stinker56 New Member

    First off, I am sorry you are having such a hard time but the thing that hit me the most was what you said about your FM doc saying "you should be grateful for the 40 good years you have had". How dare him? My first suggestion is to get rid of that "doctor" and I use the term lightly. Find one that is sympathetic to your problems and needs. No one needs to hear something like that. Second off, I know it is hard but just keep thinking positive. You know they always say it is darkest just before daylight. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there. We all care about you.
  3. alaska3355

    alaska3355 New Member

    They can be a great support system. You mentioned in your bio that you were not active recently in your church...maybe try attending when you are up to it. It's hard to let people know what is happening in your life (especially when it's tough times) but hopefully they will come to your aid, spiritually and emotionally. Ours has been a great support for us...just knowing that people care. Of course, you can always come here too...we all care about you. Love, Terri
  4. alaska3355

    alaska3355 New Member

    Happy birthday, a couple of weeks ago! Terri
  5. nanna4550

    nanna4550 New Member

    I'm sorry Susabar, I know how hard it is to be a single parent. If you can get Child Support and Alimony, it would be worth the cost of a Lawyer to file for divorse.
    I know it sounds scary, but you are strong enough to endure the abuse, so you can be strong enough to take the steps to make a better life for you and your 12 yr. old.
    This abusive jerk needs to be paying, and the law is there to inforce it. I agree that you need the support of your
    women's ministry at church - I had a few friends that helped to encourage me when I went through a similar situation. Now, I am happily married to a wonderful supportive husband and my children are grown and supporting themselves. The Lord has blessed me and He will also bless you (He doesn't like it when His children are abused). Trust Him. Love, Nanna
  6. Bambi

    Bambi New Member

    with him DO try to get a divorce and have it put in the decree that he pays for it. Get your child the support deserved and also yourself. I don't know about everywhere but here in Arizona if you've been married 5 years and have a serious health problem you can get indefinite spousal support. Get it if you can. It's also a felony here to quit a job
    to avoid paying. Talk to a lawyer ASAP!
  7. elastigirl

    elastigirl New Member

    ... but I hope things improve for you. It's very scary when you don't know what your future will hold. Sounds like you're not only worried about your illness but perhaps worried a little about your job, too.

    I was really panicked I'd lose custody of my son (no marriage involved) because I didn't have a job and my health was poor. But not working actually improved my odds because I could be home with my son. Ended up not being an issue, as his dad had a good job and could afford child support, and my father provided a home.

    If you find yourself with a little time, there is a lot of good information on the internet about improving your odds of getting custody -- and the home. In a worst case scenario, it's helpful to know someone with a cottage or second home. Sometimes they are more than happy to help out a single mom going through a rough time. I wish you well.