How do I back out of a job I took?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by doxygirl, Nov 6, 2008.

  1. doxygirl

    doxygirl New Member

    "warning long"!

    About 3 months ago my good friend who is the manager of a store in our local mall asked me to come work for her...I was honored knowing that she gets up to 20 applications per day for people looking for jobs and she called me and asked me to fill the position....

    she knows about my health with dd and said she would also work me only one to two days a week which is the most I could possibly handle!

    It has proven to be completely draining just working one day a week...oh I can do it,...... but I have also spent the next two or three days in bed after one day of working!

    But my husband is in construction and things are NOT good..he got laid off which put us ONCE AGAIN ( story of our lives) behind in our mortgage...so I feel even though it puts me in bed I have to try....I just have to!

    So...in the meantime another friend of mine who also in a manager of another store in the mall asked me to come work for her but only for the holidays ( approx 4 to 5 weeks) and the only thing I can think about is how this could really help us get caught up with our finances!

    Well....truth is, after I filled out all of my paperwork all the while thinking it will only be one or two days a week,,, she gave me my first weeks schedule and I almost passed out!

    The hours are almost full time on top of my other permanant job....

    If Iam sick and have to have bed rest from my other job which is only one day a week then how can I possibly work another job on top that is another 5 or 6 days?

    I feel so worthless that I cannot rescue our finances....it literally makes me sick...but I just cannot do this it is physically beyond my means!

    So...now that my friend is thrilled to have me on board..I have to break her heart and tell her that Iam not going to be able to do it after all.....

    and there is just no easy way....

    what do I say....Iam not asking to find white lies.....or any kind of lies at all.....I just want to tell her in a manner that lets her down easy.......can you please help me to find the words?

    Iam so sad that this dd robs me of so many things....mostly that once again the financial pressure is back all onto my husband while I wait and watch mostl from med!


    TY for your help!

    Love
    Doxy

    Doxy

    I
  2. gws

    gws New Member

    oh sweetie, i am so sorry to hear of your struggles.
    if your friend knows your health issues, i am sure she will understand.
    for me, i never know from one hour to the next what limits my body is going to give me for the day.
    it is so hard to accept that i am not who i once was, and what i was able to accomplish,
    i can't even imagine trying to work anymore, i give you much respect for trying the best as you can!
    the one thing that i am fortunate and greatful for is, my condition was service connected to the gulf war, and i am so very lucky to be able to be compensated financially by the VA.
    other wise, i would be lost.
    on top of my fibro/cfs/gws, yesterday, i was given blood test results on the ca125, that i am given every six months, this time it is quite elevated and i am having a fine needle aspiration tomorrow morning on some enlarged, painful lymph nodes.
    25 lb weight loss, in 3 weeks, needed that, lol, but am so weak, and exhausted
    im not going to worry about it right now
    whoops lost track, we must know our limitations and as hard as it is to accept, it is easier to let our friends and family know the things we can and can not do. just my experience.
    i will keep you and your husband in my prayers, and it is so great to see you back,
    something i read the other day that brought me some comfort....
    " if we learn from our suffering, and really come to understand the lesson we were taught, we might be able to help someone else who's now in the place we have just completed...maybe that's what it's all about after all......
    i know we can all get through this!!
    hang in there my friend
    love to you
    Becky


  3. landra

    landra New Member

    Better you let her know now that she has scheduled you for too much than to leave her stranded during holidays.

    I'm sorry that the finances are so hard. I'm sure you have explored things like consumer counseling to set up payment arrangements. I hope things get easier.
  4. 3gs

    3gs New Member

    I can't imagine how you can do this.

    Know the pressures of money woes are great.

    could you talk to your friend and maybe go on call as needed to fill in if you can? just tell her you didn't relealize she meant full time.

    retail is crazy at hhoildays besides hrs lots of sensory stuff going on.
    could you maybe work in back?

    take care of you. I kept pushing and thinking I could do it and have now payed a dear price. no life at all

    hugs