how do you deal wth having to use a cane or something to help you walk

Discussion in 'General Health & Wellness' started by ravenelleb, Dec 8, 2008.

  1. ravenelleb

    ravenelleb New Member

    I've recently been diagnosed with fibromylgia. i have been having a very hard time walking any distance. Recently I had to use a cane to help me. I haven't stopped crying since. How do you cope with this? The pain is bad enough but a cane just put me one the edge...does anyone have any sugestions?
  2. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    If I understand your post correctly, you are having trouble dealing with now having to use a cane when walking after many years of not having to use anything to walk.

    The most important thing is to stop crying and know that this cane is a wonderful accessory to assist you and I am grateful you have it. Rest if you must, but don't you quit (from the Don't Quit poem). Being grateful is something I hope you begin to experience as it is important to not give in to self pity, because self pity is harmful, it can rob you of your will to do things, and you risk that you may never stop crying, you may stop walking and become homebound. When you become homebound, you completely lose your independence.

    I am now 56, I live alone, and became permanently mobility disabled in a accident several years ago. I was in the hospital for a week and had temporary paralysis from just below my chest all the way down to my toes--it was so scary. Within 3 days the paralysis lifted and I learned I wouldn't be able to walk on my own. But I wasn't paralyzed--HOORAY!!!!

    That left me unable to stand or walk for more than 2 to 3 minutes. I had to spend a year dragging my body leaning on a walker because I could not afford an electric scooter. But I dragged that body and just killed my arm and shoulders muscles not giving up--and resting in stores any place I could. When I finally got my SSD approved, I was able to get an electric scooter and it has been fantastic.

    I am involved in our local disabled group (which I suggest you also do) and you will see people who have had strokes who are now paralyzed on one side and unable to talk, you will see those with multiple sclerosis, some with spine injuries that have caused paralysis from the chest down, fibro, and much more. The one woman in the group even gave up her cane and got a wonderful carved "walking stick" and she prefers that--wow!! They are wonderful people, all inspiring, but all very motivated to stay independent and to keep going in life. I want that for you. Good luck and hugs.
    [This Message was Edited on 12/09/2008]
  3. klcooper

    klcooper New Member

    I totally understand how you feel. I guess I went thru the same thing. I had a real hard time using it, even spent more money on a folding cane and tried not to use it. I've finally realized that if I have to use it at this point I will. I was able to stop for a while but the cold has really gotten to me and having a death in the family and the stress of that, has made me use it for the past few months.

    It was hard having people looking at me looking sad for me , I'm only 43 - or asking why I'm on the cane, or back on it. I know they mean well and it's hard on the people that care about you too.

    Just look at it as help that you need, just like our meds. Hope it helps you but the others are right, you do have to stop crying and change your thinking on the cane.
    Feel better and know that we all are dealing with this!
  4. SnooZQ

    SnooZQ New Member

    I am thankful for every day I can get out of bed. Some days I use a walker, other days a quad cane. I often use 2 sport walking sticks/hiking sticks ($10 ea. at Walmart) when I am able to walk outdoors for exercise.

    A few times I have had to use a motorized scooter to get around.

    To me these devices are wonderful helpers. Just like my eyeglasses, they help me achieve my goals for the day.

    I watched a friend slowly succumb to ALS. My life is full of small inconveniences, but my glass is half-full!

    A cheerful heart and a common-sense attitude to assistive technology sets a helpful example.
  5. spacee

    spacee Member

    I have had to accept that I have more in common with disabled people than the normals. There are plenty out there and they are wonderful people. I feel "normal" with them.

    It is a big adjustment. I am sorry that you are having to go throught it but you will make it!

    We are survivors.

  6. TwoCatDoctors

    TwoCatDoctors New Member

    When you have to use medical equpment like a cane, an electric scooter, a wheelchair, etc., you are under no obligation to answer questions as to why you use it. It is none of the business of people who ask that and they have no need to know. Part of being disabled I have learned is that ignorant, rude, and gossipy people will come and ask questions that you should not answer and if they want to know how much you pay for your medical applicance, tell them "I don't provide financial information," and if they want to know your disabilities, tell them "I don't discuss my medical." This is all private info and you are not required to tell it to anyone.

    Please get in the habit of making people respect you and treat you with dignity and respect and they won't do it unless you require it of them. I've been there. A woman who was paralyzed was even asked about her sex life--that is how ignorant and rude people who are not disabled can be. Otherwise, you become the subject of gossip for the whole development where you life or the apartments where you live and that's not what you want. You want to live in dignity and respect and independence and not have people coming to you all the time to get the latest gossip talk about you.