How do you maintain a successful life????

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by goaska29, Aug 29, 2005.

  1. goaska29

    goaska29 New Member

    A year ago I was working full-time, in graduate school, and had an active social life. I now do none of the above because of my CFIDS. My question is, how does everyone else with this illness make a living and go on with life? My boyfriend and I decided to move in together about a month before I got sick. This was a new thing for both of us, and being in our mid-20s, it was an exciting new progression. Now I'm afraid to do it. What if I can't work to support my part of the rent? What if he can't take the fact that I'm "tired" all the time? I'm just really scared and I'm not sure how to know I can continue with a "normal" life. Should I stuff envelopes? Start my own website? I just don't get it, I've never been a real home-body. Any suggestions would help.

    Thanks,
    GoAskAlice
  2. 30feeling80

    30feeling80 New Member

    I know how you feel. I was employed with a job I loved and was newly married when I fell ill. My life now is nothing I ever dreamed it would be.

    It's hard when you've been defined "successful" by other people's standards. Graduate school is something to be proud of. I'd say you were successful and very well rounded, educationally, socially, with a job and a serious boyfriend.

    But I found that I had to redefine Success. I am lucky enough to have an understanding husband and a very supportive family. My family relationships define my success. I feel like the richest woman in the world most of the time.

    But I have my doubtful days, too. I wish I had a magic answer for you. If you have any energy at all, try one of those self-employment things; MaryKay, PartyLite, Home Interiors. You can set your own hours.

    From my personal experience, Mary Kay worked best for me. It's easy to get started, it sells itself. But most important, the support from the other women is incredible. Many other consultants will make deliveries for you when you're too sick to get out. I swear there is something special about those women in pink.

    Go to their website and locate an Independant Sales Consultant near you. She'll be able to take it from there and answer any questions you may have.

    I sure know how you feel. Good luck.
    Darlene
  3. KMD90603

    KMD90603 New Member

    Unfortunately, there's really no definite answer to your questions because this disease affects everybody differently. While some people with CFIDS are totally bedridden, others are are able to hold down jobs, go to school, raise children, etc. And of course, there's all shades of gray in between. Also, it is important to remember that while you may not be doing well right now, it will not always be this way. I also have CFIDS and I have days where it is unbearable and I'm stuck in bed with the fatigue, achiness, fever, chills, etc. Other days I can carry out a half normal day. I am also determined not to let this disease stop me from accomplishing my goals in life. I am in nursing school and look forward to having a good career one day. I work part time right now and have a wonderful husband and a perfect little 4 year old son. I also have hope that one day there will be diagnostic tests and a treatment for CFIDS, and someday we will be taken seriously.

    Sorry, I'm rambling now. Just give it time and you will learn new skills to help you live with this illness. I've been sick for 8 years now..since I was 15 years old. My disease reared it's ugly head after having mono, although I was just diagnosed in June of 2004. I must admit, I'm getting better at understanding and acknowledging my limitations and allowing myself to stop and rest if needed.

    Gentle hugs,
    Kim